


Simplicity

by iatearepublican



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - College/University, Awkward Romance, Blowjobs, Car Sex, Cards Against Humanity, Carnival AU, Fluff, Homophobia, Ish ...??, LMAO, Love Live!, Love Live! References, M/M, NaNoWriMo, Praise Kink, Semi-Public Sex, Sexual Tension, Slurs, Smut, a lot of guys being dudes, handjobs, idk if i should tag that but dont come for me for being problematic, im losing my goddamn mind right now, it's lowkey tho, its a good idea i swear, its like theyre in college and kuroo and kenma work at a shitty carnival, rarepair hell, rarepairs, rip kuroo tetsurou, sapiosexual!Tsukki, the word 'gay' being substituted for every emotion i dont know how to convey, tsukkiken
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-01
Updated: 2016-11-30
Packaged: 2018-07-11 12:16:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 50,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7050601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iatearepublican/pseuds/iatearepublican
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kuroo gets a part time job at Kenma's parents summer carnival. Kuroo didn't know what he signed up for when a strange guy his age spends his entire college tuition on a stuffed owl, gets lost right before closing, and catches Kuroos heart all in one.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I have no idea where this is going but my friend Kelsii had the beginning idea and I'm in love with it so I must write.

   

   
         Kuroo is a simple man, he likes simple things, and he has simple needs. He likes watching the snow melt and the flowers start to bloom when the seasons change. He likes the sound of birds in the morning. He likes knowing he has high grades, and he likes knowing he's gotten into college in the first place. Some simple things, though, can be the hardest.  
  
Like, for example, having a job.  
  
How else was he going to pay for his shitty apartment in his shitty complex in his shitty neighborhood? It's something Kuroo knows he's always made himself avoid; money, jobs. It isn't the responsibility of it all that got to him, Kuroo was fine with paying bills, being an adult. But he hated, _hated_ , having to work at something he didn't give a fuck about.  
  
He grumbles about it while he fixes his stupid, brightly and ugly coloured hat on his head that makes his messy, untamable hair look even messier. He had thanked Kenma for the job, because he was just that desperate for one. He never liked carnivals, even as a kid, there were so many people and even though Kuroo really did love kids, one hundred of their sticky, grease covered hands colliding into his legs he didn't appreciate so much. Another negative to this new job was that the stand he ran wasn't even near the one Kenma ran, and was on the complete opposite of the park.  
  
Kuroo spent his days watching small children play darts for prizes and yelling at people to, basically, waste their money trying to get things that they most likely wouldn't get.  
Kuroo, being the complete pure hearted, kind person he knows he is, always felt terrible for the kids that left, because the stand he runs is rigged. The darts are dulled at the end, so they don't ever stick in the target and just hit and then fall off. Kuroo knows he was told just to take the money and sympathetically pat the kids on the back, say "better luck next time!", and then let them leave. But sometimes the kids would cry, and Kuroo would cave and give them a prize anyways.  
  
It's 8pm and 2 hours until closing. Most kids have already left with their parents, and Kuroo is bored as hell. He plays with a dart in one hand while he plays Neko Atsume on his phone with the other, sitting down on a stool he keeps in the corner of the small enclosed stand cluttered with stuffed animals and key chains. When he see's movement, Kuroo always looks up to check if someone is at the stand so he could help them, but what catches his quick eye is someone running around a bit away on the other side of the path his stand is sitting on.  
A guy who looks about his age, dressed in a normal t shirt and shorts, but with a bunch of stuffed animals underneath both arms, is running around frantically.  
  
Kuroo puts his phone down for a minute to watch, chuckling to himself as he observes. He's looking and walking around the path so quickly he bumps into a child, crouches down and says something that Kuroo assumes in an apology, before he's at it again.  
He watches him for what feels like a solid three minutes before the two actually lock eyes. The guys face brightens into a huge, happy, cheery smile, and he starts to run, full speed, up to the dart stand.  
  
Kuroo practically jumps, setting his phone down on the stool and approaching the shelf he stands behind.  
  
"Hi!!" The guy yells excitedly, and Kuroo almost laughs at just how excited he sounds. He clears his throat, seeing as this guy is his age, so he doesn't bother with what he's actually supposed to say to customers.  
  
"Ay, you here to play...or....?" Kuroo says, leans his elbow on the wood in front of him and places his cheek in his hand.  
"Yeah!" the other says, pointing up at a giant owl plushie hanging on display at the top of the small shack,  
"I want him!"  
_him_ , Kuroo thinks, smiles, finds this guy amusing.  
  
"Sure, five bucks for three darts," Kuroo says, jaw moving awkwardly as it presses hard into his hand while he talks. The guy instantly pulls out a five from his pocket, grinning and hopping slightly from foot to foot as he places it in Kuroos open hand. He places his bag on the ground and dumps the small and medium owl stuffed animals ranging in many colours down next to it.  
  
"Cool," Kuroo mutters, turns around to pluck three darts from the large bucket behind him, and then he hands them to the other.  
He smiles, backs up a bit, and then looks at the dart in his hand, confused.  
"How do I do it?"  
  
Kuroo chuckles, flips the dart in his other hand that he'd been holding to place his fingers in the proper position and bring his hand up to show the other how it's supposed to be held. He nods, grasps the dart, closes one eye, and throws it at the target.  
Just as expected, the three darts hit the target and fall to the ground, and Kuroo sighs heavily while he picks them up off of the ground.  
When he stands up, three more five dollar bills are being shoved forcefully into his face.  
  
"Uh, dude, you sure?" Kuroo blinks, and the boy looks determined.  
"Yes!" he yells.  
Kuroo watches him shuffle back, stick his tongue out of the side of his mouth ever so slightly, close one eye again, and throw the dart. It hits and falls to the floor, and Kuroo lets out a big sigh.  
  
"Hey- you" Kuroo is about to say, but the other shakes his head and shushes him, taking another dart in hand and getting ready to throw it.  
Kuroo takes this opportunity to get a good look at the guy in front of him. He hasn't been able to take in just how good he looks because he was so occupied with trying to stay caught up with him. He had a strong build, arms like some kind of greek god. His face was undoubtebly attractive as well, but with some crazy weird hair and eyebrows that were kinda off. Wild streaks of white flowing through dark grey and spiked up on two sides. It reminded Kuroo of something, but he couldn't quite name it. Bright, big golden eyes countered with muscled, rough features was a great clash. If he didn't have his hair spiked up he would look like he could kick someones ass, but with big eyes and a playful, pretty smile partnered with the jumpy, energetic and excited way he carried himself, Kuroo found him both hot and cute at the same time. Whenever his shirt would ride up a little when he threw, Kuroo breathed heavily out of his nose, watching his abs clench just a little before it was quickly hidden underneath his navy shirt again. The guy never noticed and Kuroo felt blessed because of the others obliviousness.

  
       Kuroo doesn't know how this happened.  
  
185$ later, Kuroos head is in his hands, watching and flicking his eyes back and forth from the guys hand as he throws another dart and it hits the ground. The guy is breathing heavily, and he shoves his hand into his bag that he brought with him again, but this time, emerges with nothing.  
  
"But- but!" the guy says, voice high pitched, and Kuroo snaps his head up. Was he....?  
When he turned around, Kuroo noticed the considerate amount of tears in his eyes.  
  
What the fuck.  
  
"I just! That's... oh no..." he says, wipes his eyes with his arm, and when he pulls his arm down and looks at Kuroo, Kuroo gawks. He was crying? Well, Kuroo would probably cry too if he let himself waste almost $200 on a plushie and not even _get it_.  
"Dude, you-" he says, tries to say something but nothing makes sense so he can't.  
"I just wanted," the guy says sadly, before he looks up at the owl plushie above him, and bursts into tears, " _him!_ " He points up at the owl, and Kuroo doesn't know what to say.  
  
His mouth opens, closes, opens, closes, as he watches the boy sniffle in front of him.  
He already decided $100 ago that he was just going to give this idiot his stuffed animal so he could help other customers that were about to approach but turned away when they noticed the stand was in use, but every time he went to say something, the other would shush him and say "I'm trying to concentrate."  
He walks out of the side door of the stand, out onto the path, and walks around the back and reaches up on his tip toes to unhook the bright pink and purple plushie from the hook. When he hands the guy the giant owl, the other lights up, and quickly grabs it from Kuroos hands. Enough to startle him and make him jump and eyes widen.  
  
"Thank you!! Thank you so much!" He says, snuggles his face into the side of it, and Kuroo resists the urge to whine out an 'awww', so he lets his eyebrows come together tightly and his lips press together instead.  
"Do I not have to pay you!?" He smiles, and Kuroo almost groans.  
"N-no, you, um," he feels the need to shake his head, maybe this was a dream, it was way too surreal, "you don't have to pay me."  
"Great! Because I don't have any more money I don't think!" He says, and there's two hands on one of Kuroos and it's shaking his. Kuroo is dazed by the way the guys eyes are almost as glittery as the owl plushies eyes.  
"Thanks, bro!" the guy says, before he turns around on his heel, picks up his backpack, stuffs all of his owl plushies underneath his arms, and bolts the fastest Kuroo had ever seen anyone bolt away. Kuroo blinks, looks down at his hands, blinks again, looks up. He lets out a breath he didn't know he had been holding, and checks his watch.

**9:32**

Kuroo takes his hat off, runs a hand through his hair and tugs a little when it catches on a small knot. He looked over at the stand, and then took another deep breath. He gets his things and puts the plushies away in a big bin that he slips into a locked cupboard inside of the stand, collects the money he made for the day, and locks the door to the stand before making his way to the ferris wheel.  
  
Kenma is there, the blond in his hair shining brightly underneath the flashing lights. He's watching the wheel turn, lollipop in his mouth, watching the controls for any kind of malfunction. When he sees Kuroo, he smiles softly, but doesn't wave. Kuroo hops the fence of the little box Kenma is enclosed in with the controls for the ride.  
  
"So did you work this properly all day? Or did you take a game break and accidentally end up killing someone?" Kuroo says, words coming out of a smirk. Kenma rolls his eyes.  
"Ha, ha, funny, at least I can do my job for the whole day."  
"Hey! I do my job!" Kuroo laughs, crosses his arms and leans back against the small fenced in area.  
"We're probably _losing_ money because of you," Kenma says, notices something and presses a few buttons while looking at the ride before backing off again.  
"Rude," Kuroo laughs whole heartedly, watches the ride go around for a while.  
It's pretty, the sky already dark but illuminated by the bright lights of the ferris wheel, and the faint laughter and chatter coming from it made Kuroo feel content, in a way. He suspects Kenma feels the same by the soft smile playing on his features.  
  
"Hey, have u seen some weird guy running around here at all?" Kuroo says, and Kenma squints at him in suspicion.  
"What kind of guy?"  
"Uh," Kuroo searches his mind for something other than 'fucking hot but fucking crazy', "around my height, around my age, weird white and grey hair and weird eyebrows, he had a shit ton of stuffed animals with him."  
  
Kenma lets out a long groan.  
  
"So you've finally met him,"  
"What?" Kuroo laughs, pushes himself off of the fence with his back to swipe Kenmas Pepsi and downs half of it.  
"Fucker," Kenma says, reaches up on his tip toes and waves his hand around before jumping and hitting Kuroos hand. He loses his grip, and the can goes flying to the ground and spills all over.  
  
"Oh shit, sorry," Kuroo smiles as the two look down at it.  
"You owe me another before we leave," he says, and Kuroo nods, so he continues.  
"The guy's name is Bokuto. He's obsessed with owls and he lives next door to here, he's been coming here for like, 3 weeks straight, and all he does is spend outrageous amounts of money on owl merchandise."  
Kuroo laughs, places a hand on his hip.  
"You're kidding?"  
"I wish I was," Kenma grumbles, eyes the spilled pepsi on the ground, obviously still bitter. He looks up to the ferris wheel and begins to control it to let people off slowly after announcing that the ride is coming to an end into a microphone that blasts out the speakers.  
  
"My parents love him, and honestly?" Kenma says, raising a brow at Kuroo before he chuckles lowly, "if he didn't spend his entire college tuition here every few days I don't think I'd be able to eat three meals a day."  
  
Kuroo bursts out into a fit of laughter, places his hands on his knees and lets out an ugly, cackling laugh.  
  
"Does he really spend _that_ much?" He laughs.  
"He came to the darts, I'm guessing? How much did you get from him?"  
"A'hundred and eighty somethin' " Kuroo says, leaning back against the fence. Kenma smirks to himself, turns his head away, and walks towards the small gate of the area they're in to leave and unlatch the gate to the ride enclosure for the people to get out.  
"That's not unlike him," Kenma says, and Kuroo smiles.  
"Weird," Kuroo says, asks, "will I see him again?" before he can stop himself. Kenma quirks another brow in question, but luckily brushes it off as nothing, just like Kuroo is.  
"Probably, now shut up and go buy me another soda," Kenma says, walking back into the control room to shut everything off. Kuroo chuckles, before he turns and leaves to do just that.

While Kenma sips on his new, colder Pepsi and Kuroo slips his wallet back into his back pocket, the two do their usual routine of checking if all of the rides had been turned off and secured correctly. It's originally Kenmas job to lock up the park, but Kuroo always offers to help, no matter how many times the other complains about it. Kuroo would be lying to himself if he said one of the reasons he stays is because he doesn't want to walk home alone at the normal time all of the other employees leave, but he just keeps that to himself.  
The two lock up, and walk home together, and that night, Kuroo stays up thinking about a particular guy he ran into today, Bokuto, wonders if he'll ever actually have a chance to talk to him again. 

 

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He was odd, and Kuroo couldn't figure him out. He was simple in the most complicated of ways and it made his hands shake, made it hard for him to speak around his choked out words.

It's warm again, a slight July breeze and the quiet hum of crickets can be heard if he pays enough attention. There's laughing, giggling children and carnival rides that are making normal machinery squeaking and rumbling noises that drown out most of the crickets chirping, but Kuroo's used to blocking out those sounds now.   
He pulls on two ends of a candy wrapper until it twists and opens, pops the candy into his mouth. He sucks on it while he hands a kid that's tried three times for a Mario key chain, both that key chain and a stuffed pig. The kid smiles big, his dad giving Kuroo a little appreciative nod, and Kuroo smiles softly and nods back.   
In a weird way, his fear of losing this job dwindles every time he makes a kid stop crying and start smiling, and that's way too heart warming for Kuroo to admit out loud.

It's three weeks after Kuroo met that strange guy named Bokuto.   
Ever since that day, he, for some odd reason, after Kenma told him he came here regularly, he felt himself almost looking forward to seeing him again. Every day he came to work he'd rest his hand on his cheek and drum his fingers on the shelf that held the cash register, eyes darting around the visible area of the park to see if he could find a fast moving head of black and white streaks. He never did.   
  
Kuroo had reluctantly asked Kenma a week ago where the weird guy could have been, and Kenma gave him a weird look.  
  
 _"What are you so engrossed in him for?"_  
  
Kuroo had said nothing, shook his head and raised his hands in defeat, dropped the subject.  
But it isn't nothing, Kuroo _is_  curious. The guy was odd, it was an odd experience, and he feels like there was something unfinished about it. He feels like he was too overwhelmed that he didn't react the way he would have if he was ready for it, and boy, does Kuroo hate being caught off guard.   
  
Kuroo yawns, checks his watch to see that it's almost 10, before he pulls his hands behind his back and locks them together, bending back and stretching. He pulls up his phone, searches through his games to play, but looks up when he sees a flash of blonde hair glimmering in the dim carnival ride lights.  
  
"Hey," Kenma says, "time to lock up."   
Kuroo sighs, slides his phone into his back pocket and takes out the shack key. Just like every other day, he takes the prizes and stuffs them into a box in which he locks up, with the help of Kenma. He locks the shack as well after he steps outside. The two begin to walk in a comfortable silence, besides Kuroos absent minded humming, towards the tilt-a-whirl. Most of the time, Kenmas parents would ask Kenma to stay late and double check everything before locking the gates and going back to his house. Kuroo, being the wholehearted guy he is, always tagged along to help, and totally did not stay because he was a bit afraid of the dark, of course not.   
The two had done a lot together since they were kids, being neighbours and all for most of it. Kenma was like his brother, his small, salty, unsocial but endearing little brother.   
Kuroo sighs, licks his upper lip, his bottom lip, sucks it between sharp teeth.   
  
"Did'ya see that guy today?" Kuroo says, trying not to make eye contact with Kenma.   
"No," Kenma snaps back quickly, almost startling him, "why?"   
  
"I don't know," he says, grumbling as Kenma locks the gate to another ride, flicks it lightly with his finger and watches it jostle against the metal.  
  
"I think I just don't like carnivals,"   
"Why's that?" Kenma says, takes a deep breath and shoves his hands into his jacket pockets.   
"It's always so loud, I can barely hear myself think," Kuroo sighs. Kenma laughs quietly at that.  
"Maybe it's because theres nothing to hear?" he mutters, and Kuroo didn't expect that blow, but damn did he ever walk right into it.   
  
"Uhg," Kuroo says, not in his right frame of mind to come up with a better remark. Kenma looks at him, and Kuroo looks back, and then the other turns away. He doesn't say anything, just gives Kuroo a narrowed look before walking away again towards the next place he needed to check.   
Kuroo is out of it, mind hazy and overworked and tired. Despite all this, his ears still pick up the faint humming coming a few meters away.   
  
"Kenma!" A voice yells, and Kenmas back shoots straight up, eyes go wide, pupils small and like slits.   
"Kenma!" The voice says again, and the two look over towards the Starbucks that's near the far west side of the park, farthest from the gate. Kuroo sees a guy sitting in the middle of the road, in front of the Starbucks, crossed legged and waving an excited hand at them both.   
  
He had black and white streaked hair, and Kuroo immediately knew who it was.  
  
"Bokuto!" Kenma yells, but it was Kenma, so it was a lot softer than a yell.   
  
Bokuto stands up on wobbly feet and skips his way over.  
  
"What are you doing? We're closed," Kenma sighs, folds his arms over his chest.  
  
Kuroo looks at the guy, questions his strange appearance with a quirk of a brow, but simple watches the conversation take place and doesn't get involved.  
  
"I got lost! I couldn't find the exit," Bokuto groans, rocks back on his heels and winces, crosses his arms as well.   
"I've given you a total of three maps in the past two weeks because you kept getting lost, Bokuto," Kenma says, taps a foot impatiently on the ground, and Kuroo taps a foot too, anxiously trying to pull his gaze away from Bokutos shapely forearms.   
  
"I lost them too," Bokuto says, sighing.   
  
"You're.." Kenma says, realizes any attempt at talking to this guy was in vain, and groans to himself.   
"Kuroo and I are locking up, come with us so I can keep an eye on you, and then we'll walk you out."  
"Sweet," Bokuto says, gives Kuroo a smiling glance before he's rushing up beside Kenma. Kuroo feels his head spin, the guys eyes so gold and shimmery and warm and inviting and Kuroo shakes his head, strides long legs up to quickly walk beside Kenma.

After Kuroo smoothly decides he wants to buy him and his new trio some slushies from the snack bar before they lock it up for the night, completely unnoticed both by Bokuto and himself that he did it to be smooth, the three make their way towards the gate.  
  
It's still warm out, but humid, and the sticky wetness in the air threatens to screw up Kuroos hair more than usual. He drags a hand through it as he follows Kenma, slightly behind him, staring at the ground and hunched over in thought, taking quick steps. It didn't go unnoticed by Kenma, Kuroo knew, that kid could see everything, but he didn't care.  
  
He searches his mind, licks his bottom lip and sucks it between teeth. He felt obligated, for some reason, to help this guy out. He felt a pull towards this guy. He felt like giving him a giant stuffed owl like he wanted wasn't enough for 185$.   
  
Something clicks, and Kuroo takes a breath in and smiles at himself. When they approach the main gate, Kuroo checks something on the wall, before stepping out and chaining and locking the gate behind him and the other two.   
  
"Thanks Kenma!" Bokuto chirps, sipping on the blue slushie happily. He looks down into his cup, takes the straw between two fingers and stirrs it, then looks up into Kuroos eyes, and it catches him off guard and he almost, _almost_ jumps.   
  
"And thank you for the drink dude!" He says, and Kuroo swallows thickly.   
"No problem, bro," Kuroo says, and then he looks down at his hands. He feels Bokuto watching him, happy and seeing Kuroo wants to say something else. The uncomfortable part was Kenmas eyes, he felt them all over, analyzing him. Kuroo took a deep breath, tried to seem as chill as he could. He sips his green slushie and speaks around the patterned straw.  
  
"You wasted like 180 bucks when you came to the darts stand a few weeks ago," Kuroo starts.   
"Nah, dude! I got that big stuffed owl remember?" Bokuto says, and Kuroo feels like laughing, but he knows it would come off nervous so he doesn't.   
  
"The game was rigged, dude," he says, and he feels Kenmas eyes bore into him deeper, knows he's gonna regret letting that information slip. He continues nonetheless.   
"And you used a lot of money that you didn't need to waste, so, if you're cool with it or whatever," Kuroo swallows again, throat tight.   
He crosses his arms, leans his weight to his left in a pose that he tries to make look nonchalant.   
  
"I took all that money, and I should pay you back for it, y'know, by buying you something, or something.." Kuroo says, and he bites his lips when the words come out. He looks up, Bokuto is contemplating something, looking up at the sky in thought, and Kuroo latches his eyes to the crease in his neck that leads to his collarbone, dipping down and carved divinely out of his form.   
  
"Yeah, sure," he says, smiles, and Kuroo smirks, tries not to let Kenmas knowing glare break him down.   
  
"So I'll like, give you my number, and I'll buy you lunch or something?" Kuroo says, "y'know, just to pay you back," he quickly covers himself.   
  
Bokuto nods, and the other gives him his number. Kuroo is all smiles and half lidded eyelids and holding his hand on Bokutos a little too long when he places the piece of ripped notebook paper into his palm.   
"See'ya," Kuroo says over his shoulder, and Bokuto is waving and walking away practically breathing in his drink.

Kenma is quiet for most of the walk to the bus stop, but Kuroo can feel something unpleasant churning in his gut and he can feel an awkwardness radiating between the two of them.   
Kenma is the one to break the tension, a block away from both of their houses, with a big exasperated sigh.   
"Is it just me, or did you just ask Bokuto out on a _date?_ "   
"Of course not!" Kuroo laughs, throws his head back, "I'm doing what any kind person would do in my situation."   
  
Kenma chuckles to himself, stuffs his hands back into his pockets, where he plays with his house key that can be heard jingling around.   
  
"You've never done this before, don't tell me you find him endearing.."   
  
Kuroo shakes his head.  
  
"Nah, just being a bro," Kuroo smiles to himself, small enough Kenma couldn't see it in the darkness. They turn the corner, bus stop in sight. Kenma kicks at a piece of loose gravel, and they both watch it tumble through a sewer drains bars and make a loud cracking noise when it hits the bottom.   
When the two board the bus they don't talk any further, Kenma too busy solving some kind of puzzle in the game he was playing on is psp. Kuroos stop is first, and after they say their goodbye's, he makes his way quickly up the steps to his apartment.   
Once he's settled, flopped down on his messy bed in his messy room in his messy apartment, he takes a short nap before getting up to browse the internet and enjoy the rest of his night in silent comfort. Kuroo, throughout his night, can't help glancing at his phone almost every minute. He watches a few videos on Youtube, listens to some music, opens and closes Twitter about 5 times, all while keeping on eye on an inactive phone. He had the next two days off, and he was excited to hear back from Bokuto so he could get something started.   
  
He didn't know what he wanted, just knew that this guy was hot and absent minded and that he loves owls, and he doesn't know anything about what this may turn out to be. But he sighs, knows he should get to know him more before he makes up his mind, but that's just so not Kuroos style.  
  
The text he's waiting for breaks him out of his thoughts.  
  


 **Unknown Number**  
 **Hello? :0 Kuroo?**  
  
  
Kuroo quickly creates the number as a contact, labels it "hot boi" with a winky face emoji, and then taps out a message back.

 **To: hot boi**  
 **yea its kuroo, is this bokuto?**  
  
 **  
From: hot boi**  
 **Bokuto here!! :) How are you???**  
  
  
Kuroo smiles at the message, feels a warm feeling in his cheeks and chooses to ignore it. They make plans for the next day at lunch at some shitty burger joint of Bokutos choice. Kuroo smiles before he gets up to make himself some coffee. He's all confidence even though he's by himself, excitedly and nervously waits for the next day.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading!!! follow me on twitter @owlfuker bc i love bokuroo and bokuto and i love meeting people who love those two things.   
> Also check out my other Bokuroo work bc it's like 10x better than this lmao


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "It's so pretty," he hears Bokuto mutter softly.  
> He's sweating, and he let's out another breath, before he lightly lets his fingers dust over the knuckles of the two boys. He flinches, but doesn't tear his hand away, so Kuroo lets his hand rest half on top, not completely holding his hand, but enough to feel the skin underneath his own hand.  
> The air falls silent again for a few minutes, the two enjoying each others company before feeling the weight of their droopy eyes remind them that they have used a lot of energy and the day needs to end earlier than most for both of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been over two months since I've updated!!! IM SO SORRY I've been so out of ideas and motivation. I feel terrible, here 6k as an apology. (I'll be really editing this soon so sorry for mistakes!!)

               He pushes the glossy door open, steps inside and immediately he's hit with the thick, greasy smell of fries and burgers. He bites his lip, leans in to his glassy reflection in the door to check his teeth and brush a hand loosely through his hair, straighten out the long black shirt he was wearing and pat around his blue skinny jeans for his wallet, just in case.  
Kuroo tells himself that he doesn't know how he got into this situation, which he immediately regrets thinking because _yes_ , he does know. His palms sweat, the top of his forehead where his bangs won't cover prickled with nervous sweat as well. He's baffled, confused, at the way he's acting. Kuroo swallows thickly.

_Am I actually....nervous?_

He spots familiar wild hair on the other side of the diner, and checks his face and hair quickly in the glass again before he's making his way over. His heart leaps, a deeper pit digs into his lower stomach with every stride towards Bokuto, who is staring out the window with a slight smile, obviously entranced in something outside.

 _do I look too eager?_  
  
He shakes his head,  
  
_snap out of it, christ.._

He slips into the booth, watches the pretty round eyes in front of him flick towards him, and a big smile follow and send a warm shiver up Kuroos nerves.  
"Hey," Kuroo says, and he plans to say something else but he's cut off.  
"Hey! What's your name again? Also is this an okay place? I don't really know anything about you, so I don't know much about what you like to eat and stuff.." Bokuto smiles, and there are too many questions he asked for Kuroo to answer them all, so he settles on just one.  
"Well," Kuroo says, leans his elbow on the table and rests his cheek on his hand, smiles softly into the side of it, "we're here to get to know each other, aren't we?"  
It wasn't much of a question as it was something playful, but Bokuto didn't get the hint.  
"...no? You said you were paying me back!"  
"Uh, yeah..that," Kuroo says, eyes wide, blinking.  
There's silence for a moment, and Kuroo feels like kicking himself.

 _where did your game go, Kuroo Tetsurou? What the fuck..._  
  
This was so unlike him, absentmindedly scratching and playing with the bottom of his shirt.  
He's scared out of his thoughts when Bokuo leans over the table to get a better look at Kuroos face, and mutters, "hey, 'you nervous or something, my guy?"  
Kuroo snaps his head up, and whispers out a suspicious "no!" that was way too loud and came out way too rushed. Bokutos eyebrows go up, and he sits back.  
Kuroo rubs a hand through his hair, smiles and laughs nervously with dark eyes glued to a spot on the tiled floor. This was going to be a long meetup.

They had gotten their food, both of them already almost finished. Light conversation was hard but once they got into it and once Kuroo peaked Bokutos interest on birds, the guy went off about them. Kuroo drank in the excited hand movements and bright passionate eyes as he talked about birds and his favourite owls, and then his favourite owl plushie (who's name was Bambi, after his favourite Disney movie, Kuroo learns).

"And then he says 'Bokuto watch out there's pot holes around here', and right then I fall to the ground and I skin my knees!" Bokuto explains, hand gestures flailing around everywhere as he tells Kuroo a story about his best friend Akaashi and him. Kuroo laughs, and Bokuto does as well, biting into his burger. A small amount of ketchup dribbles out and settles itself on the side of Bokutos mouth. Kuroo smirks to himself at an idea that pops into his head, one that will save that famous Kuroo Suave Game™.  
  
"You've got something there," Kuroo says, and points to the side of his own mouth. When Bokuto goes to reach for it however, Kuroo is quick, leaning across the table and whispering "I'll get it", before doing just that and swiping the ketchup away with his thumb. Still close to Bokuto, he makes sure to make eye contact when he slips the digit into his own mouth. He smiles as he sits back in his chair. Bokuto blinks a few times, eyes wide, shoulders tense, before he looks out the window with a very obvious blush forming on his cheeks and spreading down his neck.  
  
"Th-thanks," he says, and swallows thickly, unable to make eye contact with Kuroo for a few minutes afterwards.  
Just as Kuroo is about to drop in some more oh-so-suave comments to try and get the other boy to get a hint of his intentions again, he's cut off when Bokuto checks his phone for the time and gasps a bit too dramatically.  
"I have to get home!" he says, and slips his bag over his shoulder. Kuroo blinks, and Bokuto gets up and turns on his heel without saying anything else, but Kuroo catches him quickly.  
  
"Wait! Will I see you again?" Kuroo says, and then swallows because that was not the right way to word that sentence.  
Bokuto turns around and looks over his shoulder, blinks, and then turns around fully to face Kuroo.  
"Yeah," he says, and looks down at his bag, then his hands, then out the window.  
"I was actually wondering if maybe," Bokuto sighs, and Kuroos eyes light up and he straightens out his slouch and listens closely, "maybe you'd like to maybe, like, on one of your days off we could go to the carnival together or something...?"  
Kuroo lets a slow smile spread across his face, watches Bokutos eyes flick to meet his gaze before flicking away again, a light pink dusted across his cheeks.  
"Yeah, sure, I'm off Friday, if you wanna go then."  
Bokuto nods twice, looking down and smiling softly to himself in excitement, before he's waving goodbye and walking away and out the doors. Kuroo watches him leave, paying special attention to the sway of his hips, and watches through the window as he exits the restaurant. Bokuto pulls his hands into fists and jumps up and down quickly a few times, shaking his hands and then pumping one into the sky before he's skipping off towards his car. Kuroo laughs at the display, and then he smirks to himself, leans back in the booth bench and puts his hands behind his head, feeling content and triumphant.

          Friday couldn't roll around slower, the calendar and his phone clock becoming Kuroos worst enemy. Eventually Friday afternoon comes and Kuroo is quick to hop in the shower, brush his teeth, style his hair, and pick out a nice dark blue silky collared shirt to wear. He takes the bus on a whim today, not taking his usual walking route. He arrives 20 minutes earlier than he's supposed to, so Kuroo decides to scout around the carnival to try and find Kenma. Eventually, he does, working the Ferris Wheel again for the third time that week. Kuroo sees Kenmas expression change as he notices Kuroo walking towards him, from bored to confused.  
  
"You know you don't have work today, right?" Kenma asks, blinking up at him. Kuroo fake pouts and crosses his arms.  
"The first thing you say to me isn't even a hello? Not even a 'Kuroo I'm happy to see you'?"  
  
Kenma chuckles lowly to himself, watching the controls.  
  
"Saying I'm happy to see you wouldn't be my most honest answer."  
"Wow, fuck you too, dude," Kuroo smiles and sighs lightly, leaning on the fenced in area of the ferris wheel control room. After a few moments of silence and watching the ride turn against the pretty blue sky, Kenma gives Kuroo a side glance.  
  
"So, what are you doing here then?" he asks, and Kuroo gives a halfhearted shrug.  
"I thought I'd spend my day here and go on some rides and shit, I do get a discount and all."  
"That's bullshit, you're bullshit, Kuroo you would never step in here if you weren't getting paid," Kenma laughs, quirking a brow at Kuroo, silently asking for the real reason he's here.  
"Well now, this bullshit is off to ride the big boy roller coaster all by himself," Kuroo smirks, "have fun working this for two more hours, loser." With that, Kuroo tousles Kenmas pudding hair just enough to mess it up before he's running away towards the place Bokuto told him to meet him at.  
The heartwarming big smile and weird hair has Kuroo smiling back when Bokuto runs up to him, waving a hand above his hand in excitement.  
  
"There you are!" Bokuto says, rocking back and forth on his heels. He's wearing a casual plaid shirt unbuttoned to show his black shirt underneath, sleeves rolled up halfway, and casual jeans. Kuroo smiles softly, this guy was just too cute.  
"Here I am," he says nonchalantly. Before he knows it two strong hands firmly grab onto his wrist, and begins to tug him along.  
"Where do you wanna go first? Do you like rollercoasters? Food?"  
Kuroo, yet again, is taken aback by Bokutos bold behaviour and short circuits for a moment.  
  
"I, yeah, I, I like r-roller coasters," he says, eyebrows furrowing as he listens to himself speak in the least cool way he possibly could.  
"I love roller coasters, have you been on Vortex?" Bokuto smiles, letting go of his hand to walk backwards while facing Kuroo. Kuroo shakes his head.  
"Nah,"  
"Flight Deck?"  
"No,"  
"Spitfire!?"  
"Not that one either,"  
Kuroo watches Bokuto pout slightly.  
"Leviathan? Thunderbolt? Obliterator? Silver Streak?"  
"No, dude, I've never ridden anything in this park before," Kuroo laughs lightly, and Bokuto stops in his tracks.  
"Wait hold on...you work here, and you haven't ridden...ANY.. of the rides?" Bokutos fuckin' weird eyebrows are raised high in disbelief.  
"Nah, dude."  
  
Bokuto gasps.  
  
"We have to ride all the rides here today! I'll show you my favourite ones!" Bokuto smiles, and grabs hold of Kuroos hand again. Kuroo smiles softly.  
"Actually, Bokuto," he says, moving a little bit closer, shoulders bumping together and Kuroo slips his hand out of Bokutos grip to move it lightly up his arm and then down to place on his lower back.  
  
"I have an idea of what I want to ride," he says smoothly, watching Bokutos expression turn into a confused one.  
"What one?" he says, and Kuroo laughs lowly, softly kneading his fingers into Bokutos shirt and dipping his fingers underneath to touch lightly at the skin there, giving Bokuto a side glance and a confident sultry smile. He watches Bokuto go pink and wide eyed, practically jumping out of his skin.  
"Oh! Oh that! I-"  
"That one, right over there," Kuroo says, pretending he didn't mean exactly what he did, as he points towards the nearest rollercoaster in sight.  
"Oh...oh, yes, oh okay!" Bokuto says, giving a shaky smile.  
  
Kuroo watches Bokuto stare at the ground in muddled thought for a moment, trying to stop the blush splaying down the back of his neck as they walk towards the coaster.  
  
          "So you've never tried funnel cake before either?" Bokuto says, cutting a piece of his off and shoving it into his mouth. The day had gone by quickly, Kuroo found, Bokuto tugging him all over the place to go on every single ride and coaster that he could see, explaining to Kuroo where everything was. He found it endearing, Bokuto being basically an expert on the carnival Kuroo himself works at and not realizing Kuroo has to know where everything is.  
It was 3 hours before closing and the afternood sky had already started to fade slowly into a pretty evening purple. The sun had set to various bright hues of orange and pink and purple, painting the sky and urging Bokuto to talk for a while about how he loves to watch clouds go by.  
Kuroo puts his hand on his chin, and smiles back at Bokuto.  
  
"No, no I haven't," Kuroo says, and Bokuto smiles.  
  
"Well, I'm not giving you any of mine," he says, and Kuroo, not expecting that answer, laughs without filter for a moment. When he looks up, Bokuto looks a little triumphant. Kuroo just watches the other with half lidded eyes not-so-chalantly grazing them over Bokutos features and making sure to let their eyes catch every so often. Kuroo takes the darker the blush gets on Bokutos face as score points. He lifts up a foot and strokes it along Bokutos calf under the table they're sitting at, laughs and covers himself with "haha, footsies!" when the other jumps and giggles nervously.  
  
"So, um," Bokuto says, only a few bites left of his funnel cake, Kuroo was surprised - this guy could eat a lot, "it's getting late," Bokuto sighs, and Kuroos eyes widen, and his suave cool filter rejects him for a moment.  
  
"What? You sure you want to leave now?" Kuroo says a little too eagerly, and he cringes and clamps his teeth down on his lower lip as punishment to himself for being such a dildo.  
  
"Well, I really kind of want to go on the Ferris Wheel. It's my favourite thing to do before I leave," Bokuto says, looking down at his thumbs twiddling in his lap. Kuroo smiles.  
"Yeah, of course," he says softly, and stands up, tossing his Pepsi can into the trash. Bokutos nervous expression has quickly turned giddy with excitement again, and Kuroo loves how quickly his mood could change, it made him just that more exciting and unpredictable.  
They're on their way to the ferris wheel when Kuroo realizes that Kenma could still be working at that particular ride. Each step closer Kuroo gets lost in his own thoughts of what he's going to say, how he's going to explain this without sounding...fucking....gay as hell. He accidently blocks Bokutos constant chatter out for a moment as he runs through the things he could say.  
  
_"Yeah I found him over there, he's been looking for you"_  
_"He stole my wallet and won't give it back until I go on this ride with him"_  
_"I'm a shithead dude, sorry for lying to you but I really wanna fuck this guy"_  
  
"Kuroo?"  
  
"Fuck!" Kuroos eyes open wide a bit at the sight of Kenma right in front of him, a questioning look on his features.  
"Ah, fuck, I," Kuroo clears his throat, "I mean, ah fuck! Look at the time! Kenma you think your shifts almost over, eh?"  
Kenma rolls his eyes, collects a ticket from a person boarding the ride and tells them quietly to not rock the cart, not stand while the ride is running, and to wait for the ride to come to a complete stop before standing up to exit.  
  
"Why is Bokuto with you?" Kenma says afterwards, looking at Kuroo only through a side glare.  
"Oh?" Kuroo says, and turns to Bokuto, "oh, well, um, I didn't know he, uh, he was here," Kuroo says, and got he wants to die. Can the ground swallow him right now? Or his guardian angel fly down and kick him right in the balls for being such an uncool loser right now?  
"...uh-huh.." Kenma says, obviously not convinced, but he looks to Bokuto and then Kuroo, then back and forth again, and sighs. Kuroo gives an unconfident, nervous smile.  
"Are you both riding together?" Kenma asks, tucking part of his hair behind his ear.  
"Yeah! Also Kenma did you get a new haircut?"  
"No, Bokuto," Kenma sighs through his nose, "here's your tickets, don't rock the cart or stand up or anything... Kuroo I swear to god," Kenma says, and Kuroo throws him back an 'a-ok' gesture and a wink. The two scramble into their cart and wait only a few minutes before they're being lifted up with the rest of the carts closer and closer to the night sky.  
  
The two sit in a comfortable silence together, waiting for their cart to get to the top, and when it does, Bokuto lets out the tiniest gasp and claps his hands together three quick times so softly it's almost inaudible, and Kuroo has to try so hard not to literally say 'aww' out loud.  
Looking up through the finger print muddled glass they can see the last few remnants of the sunset far in the distance. Slivers of pinks and orange twisting and blending together to make the prettiest of hues. A light layer of stars has started to paint through the skies, peeking through the clouds and twinkling for the world. The air was warm and humid, a little thick. Kuroo runs a hand through his hair and lets out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding.  
  
"It's so pretty," he hears Bokuto mutter softly from beside him.  
"Yeah," is all Kuroo can manage to say. He's sweating, and he let's out another breath, before he lightly lets his fingers dust over the knuckles of the two boys. He flinches, but doesn't tear his hand away, so Kuroo lets his hand rest half on top, not completely holding his hand, but enough to feel the skin underneath his own hand.  
The air falls silent again for a few minutes, the two enjoying each others company before feeling the weight of their droopy eyes remind them that they have used a lot of energy and the day needs to end earlier than most for both of them.  
The cart slowly rolls back down to the ground, and the two get out. Kuroo getting off first, he reaches out as Bokuto steps down the thin steps to get out of the cart and onto the ground and places his hand yet again on the small of Bokutos back, guiding him down. Bokuto lets out a low chuckle Kuroo hadn't heard from him yet before, so he quirks a brow and smirks to himself.

_Maybe I'm finally getting through to him?_

They're walking out of the exit gate when Kuroo catches Kenmas eye, which was a frantic one, and arms flailing telling him to get over there, fast.  
  
"Sorry, uh, hold on," Kuroo says, patting Bokuto on the top of his hand before jogging up to the controls stand.  
"What's wrong?" Kuroo says, cutting the usual bullshit in half.  
"Tanaka fucking left, literally just got up and left ... Oh I am going to _murder_ that guy.."  
"What? What do you mean?"  
"The darts stand, Tanaka was supposed to be working until closing.. but I just saw him walk away with some girl."  
  
Kuroo quirks a brow and laughs in confusion. He feels Bokuto walk up behind him but pays no attention at the moment.  
  
"Who even..." Kenma says, holding the bridge of his nose between thumb and forefinger, eyebrows knitted tight together and words spat through a grimace, "who even can get... y'know.... at 8 pm..."  
Kuroo keeps his confused and crooked smile, and bewildered eyes locked on Kenma, wondering why he was called over.  
  
"Okay," Kenma says, clearing his head with a light clap of his hands, "you need to run the stand for the new two hours, Kuroo," he says through a sigh and a roll of his eyes, knowing this won't end well.  
"What!?" Kuroo says, hands gripping the side of the fence as he leans his upper body into the boxed in area. "This is my day off!"  
"It's two hours Kuroo, come on, I'll buy you lunch or something!"  
Kuroo sucks in his lips, stares blankly at a tree in the distance as he tries to get through his mind that he's gotta cut this date short.  
"Fine," he says, runs his fingers through his hair again and stares wide eyed at the ground for a moment, "fine, fuck, god you owe me."  
"Yeah, I owe you, now go."  
  
Kuroo starts walking, but only a few steps away he stops and turns on his heel.  
"My uniform's at home though?" Kuroo says, hoping Kenma will say,  
  
_"Oh okay Kuroo! Then it's okay, you go home and make out with Bokuto for a while. I'll come by tomorrow and bring you subway, don't sweat it!"_

but instead he's met with a,  
  
"Kuroo if you don't get that freeloader ass over to the darts stand-"  
  
"Okay, alright, I'm going, jeez" Kuroo says, laughing. Kenma seemed pretty distressed, and a distressed Kenma was an angry and snappy Kenma. Kuroo starts walking in the direction of the darts stand, Bokuto running up close to his side.  
  
"Hey so, uh," Kuroo says, "I'm so sorry to cut this short, but, duty calls! Y'know?" Kuroo says, giving Bokuto a half hearted smile, still a little pissed he has to do this at all.  
"It's okay! I can help you run the stand or something!"  
Kuroos brows turn together and he wheezes out a disbelieving laugh.  
"No, god no. You need training for this stuff," he says, when Kuroo sure as hell knows you don't. He would rather cut this short than for it to be awkward for two hours sitting in a stuffed animal and keychain covered wooden stand for two more hours. How romantic.  
"Please, hey," Bokuto says, and Kuroo walks faster, but a hand grabs his and forces him to stop. Kuroo takes not of how strong his pull is.  
"I don't want to leave yet," Bokuto says, looking into Kuroos eyes, and fuck he feels a knot forming in his stomach and butterflies threatening to come up his throat. He looses his cool, for the thousandth time that night.  
"Uh, yeah- fine.." he stammers. Bokutos big toothy grin doesn't help his rapid heartbeat.

They're in the stand together, and it's been about 45 minutes since they had gotten there. Bokuto was playing some game on his phone on the back stool Kuroo usually sits on, and Kuroo was standing by the cash register, drumming his fingers along the wooden edge of the counter to a never ending tune he's creating on the spot in his head. Kuroo's not that over the fact he has to stand here, and it's more awkward than he imagined. There was one batch of young teenagers that came by half an hour ago, but there hasn't been anyone at the stand since then and they were both getting bored as hell. Bokuto being Bokuto, wouldn't be able to stay happy with playing a mobile game for another hour. Kuroo just didn't know what to do. He was completely stumped for ideas.  
  
So Bokuto had one instead.  
  
"Hey," Bokuto says, standing up and stretching a little bit, "can you teach me how to throw the darts right..?"  
Kuroo laughs nervously, the silence breaking quickly and unexpectedly with Bokutos rough voice.  
"Yeah, sure, c'mere" he says, a little sleepy.  
  
He pulls a dart up with expert hands and turns around to find Bokuto a little too close to him, excited to try something new.  
Kuroo shuffles a smidge away, and puts the dart in Bokutos hand, bringing it up to get his fingers in the right position and his elbow bent right. It's warm between them, the silence a little odd, the only sounds being crickets and the low hum of machinery.  
  
"You just, kinda, clasp your fingers around it like this," Kuroo says. He feels Bokutos thumb caress the underside of his own thumb, it tickles, sending the slightest of shivers up his arm.  
"No, you gotta keep your thumb here, like this." Kuroo adjusts Bokutos fingers again, the right way, and finds his own hands to be sweating a lot. The air changes, thickens, thins, Kuroo can't tell, but it's different.  
"Like this?" Bokuto says, voice a little softer than usual, and Kuroo jumps lightly at the other one of Bokutos hands that slides oh so obviously down Kuroos side and rests down on his hip, making him jump.  
  
"A-and then.. then you just, um," Kuroo says, momentarily forgetting everything he knows about throwing darts.  
"Um, you take, you're....uh..."  
  
Bokuto listens, patiently, gold eyes boring into Kuroos with slight curiousity. Kuroo doesn't understand when a soft smile plays on Bokuto features, eyes going half lidded, and then in a harsh whisper, he says "you're all red."  
Kuroo visibly swallows, hard, at that, but he tries to ignore it.  
  
"No...I'm not...uhm, okay so you just, bend your elbow back just a little-" but his voice trails off when slow circles start being rubbed into his hip.  
"Hm?" Bokuto mumbles, and Kuroo almost loses it.  
"Shit, uhm, s-so," Kuroo manages to get out, and he can feel his voice shaking and he can feel his body give in and start to shake lightly too, feel the heat radiating off of his cheeks and neck and forehead, wants to wipe the beads of sweat forming on his brows.  
  
"You're shaking," Bokuto mutters in the same tone, and Kuroo laughs so nervously it sounds more fake than anything.  
"Y-yeah, well, the.. so, so the dart-" Kuroo says, and his voice just keeps getting shakier, and he tries to distract himself by adjusting Bokutos fingers again, but his other hand creeps around slightly to give his ass a hard squeeze, and Kuroo just fucking jumps. He's lost for words, unable to really figure out what's going on, just able to feel. Like how the light scratch of Bokutos nail up his spine when Bokuto lifts up his shirt a little to expose his heated tanned skin underneath, how it sends an electrifying shiver up his back that reaches his ears.  
  
"Ah," the tiniest moan makes it's way out of Kuroos mouth, that he tries to cover up with a cough. He mentally curses at himself for letting that slip. Although in that moment, Bokuto tugs Kuroos weak fingers off of the dart, and he drops it to the ground.  
  
"You're such a tease," Bokuto sighs, lightly pushes Kuroo back a little so his back is against the side wall of the inside of the stand. Kuroos eyes widen, pupils dilate, but he can't respond, only lets his mouth open just a little.  
"All day today, at the diner... you think I don't notice?" he mutters, faces oh so close.  
"I-I um... I just, I was just, flirting... y'know?" Kuroo manages to get out. Bokuto slides his body up tight with Kuroos, one hand playing lightly on Kuroos collarbone and the other still firm on his ass.  
"Yeah, I know you were," Bokuto chuckles lowly. Kuroo feels his heartbeat skip, speed up, skip again, and he feels frozen. Not in fear, ... but... Kuroo remembers what he said earlier, and he was right, ... about Bokuto being unpredictable.  
As if it couldn't get worse, Bokuto dips his head down to rest in the crook of Kuroos neck, and licks a long wet line up from collarbone to the back of his ear. Kuroo takes in the quickest, sharpest of breaths. He then lifts his head up to look back at Kuroo, who's standing there, not able to process anything, and he's mentally killing himself as well as trying to figure out what the hell to do but it's not doing him any good. He just stands there, in a trance, almost.  
"You're so pretty, Kuroo," Bokuto says, a barely audible whisper, and Kuroos throat seizes up for just a moment.  
  
So Bokuto get's right to it.  
  
Bodies already flush against each other, Bokuto grips his hands on Kuroos hips as he dips down again into Kuroos neck, placing sloppy and opened mouthed tongue kisses all along it, up and down, then up again to bruise-kiss his lips. Kuroo doesn't know what to do with his hands, sliding up and down the arms holding his hips in place as he's kissed breathless.  
  
"Shit, I-" Kuroo says when Bokuto pulls back for air, but he's cut off again with harsher, harder kisses that are making his head spin in a thick haze.  
Bokuto slides his grabby hands from Kuroos hips to trace up along the bottom of his chest, and Kuroo bucks up by accident and then whispers a light "fuck" to himself. Bokuto just giggles, fucking giggles, and then continues to slide his hands up Kuroos stomach, under his shirt and up his chest, bunching his shirt up as high as it will go. . Kuroo tried. He tried to grab first, unbuckle his belt first, but Kuroo is learning quickly that when Bokuto wants something, he goes for it, pretty aggressively, and he's not complaining. Just, surprised. Who knew someone who collects an embarrassing amount of stuffed owls and flushes bright red when someone holds his hand could shove Kuroo against the wall and kiss away every breath he's drawn out of him. Bokuto places even more kisses along the expanse of Kuroos chest, up along his nipples, which earn Bokuto some pretty whines, and back down to suck a dark, dark hickey into the quivering part of Kuroos stomach.  
  
"I- Boku-to... I'm..I'm working.." Kuroo manages to croak out. Bokuto moves lower and slides his tongue down and onto the part of Kuroos pants that's straining against him in the worst way possible right now. Bokuto looks up at him through half lidded, golden, shimmering eyes.  
  
"So?" he whispers against him, hot breath urging Kuroo to buck up against Bokutos warm mouth. He reaches a shaking hand down and runs it through Bokutos messy hair, gel worn out long ago through their en devours.  
  
"Okay...okay....t-true.." Kuroo whispers, eyes locked on the cieling as he feels the zipper of his pants being tugged down ever so slowly.  
"Fuck...." Kuroo swallows thickly again, " _fuck..._ "   
Bokuto chuckles again, responds with a, "keep your voice down," and Kuroo tries. He bites the bottom of hit lip so hard when Bokuto shuffles his pants down to his ankles, licks a line from the bottom to the top of the straining bulge in Kuroos underwear. He shivers, rolls his hips up, but Bokuto pushes his hands lightly but firmly down on Kuroos hips so he stays still for him.  
  
"A-ah..mn" Kuroo huffs out. He's so hard, it doesn't hurt but if Bokuto doesn't hurry up and get going or do _something_ already Kuroo thinks he might scream. He doesn't want to beg though, his pride won't let him do that for sure.  
"C..." Kuroo slides his hand through Bokutos hair again, scraping his nails lightly along his scalp that makes Bokuto let out a high little hum.  
  
"If you keep doing that I'm gonna have to stop and make you just give me a head massage, dude," Bokuto lets out. Kuroo whines at that, fingers tightening on Bokutos head as he stops his ministrations to watch Kuroo above him.  
"No no..no don't stop..." Kuroo breathes out, and he can feel Bokutos smile on him again as he sucks him lightly through his underwear. Wait, was that ... did Kuroo just beg? Surely not, he... he didn't say please, right?  
Kuroo almost doesn't notice when Bokuto pulls his underwear down in one fluid motion, mouth immediately hovering above the tip of Kuroos dick. He blows softly on it before using the tip of his tongue to dig lightly into the slit, and Kuroo fails to hold back a whine.  
  
"Be quiet, okay?" Bokuto whispers against him, and Kuroo nods, nods so damn quickly. He shuts his eyes, hopes the pleasure will come soon, tries to roll his hips up but they're pinned firmly down by Bokutos strong hands.  
  
"Wait.." Bokuto says, and Kuroo looks down, breathless.  
"Fuck...fuck...c'mon, fuck.." Kuroo gasps out, eyes barely open.  
"Kuroo.." Bokuto sighs against him.  
"Oh come on _fuck_.. dude, please," Kuroo says, winces at the begging but is too far gone to care as much as he usually would. Kuroo tries three times to roll his hips up, but Bokuto keeps him there, head leaning away from him as if listening for something. Kuroo feels like crying, his dick almost hurt at this point.  
"B- _Bo_ kuto..." he sighs, whines more like it, but then he hears what Bokuto is talking about.  
  
"Kuroo!? Did you leave!? I swear!" from outside the stall. Kuroos back straightens, and he looks down and locks in a stare with Bokuto for what was about 10 seconds but felt like forever... it was Kenma. Kuroo didn't know how much time had past, all he knew was the Kenma could not, ever, ever, EVER, see him like this. It's already bad if your best friend sees your dick, but god is it so much worse when you're not even dominating when you've told him... countless times... what a good dom you are.  
Shit.  
Kuroo takes in a sharp breath again when Kenma yells out his name again. Bokuto, as if on cue with Kenma's voice, grabs Kuroo by the top of his hips and forcefully guides him to sit down on the ground. Ass against the cold concrete, legs open, Kuroo quirks a brow at him through his lustful haze. Bokuto smiles as he moves in closer, gives him a light kiss, before he's kissing down his body again. Kuroo kicks off his pants and underwear that were pooling at his ankles. Kuroos long legs twitch in the air as Bokuto keeps moving lower and lower. Kuroo can feel a moan bubbling in the back of his throat, eyes watering as he tries to keep himself contained.  
  
"Kuroo!?" Kenmas voice can be heard around the back of the stand, and Bokuto decides that's the right time to deep throat him.  
  
"Aa-" Kuroos surprised, loud moan is cut off when Bokuto grabs Kuroos face forcefully with his one hand, gripping his jaw and covering Kuroos mouth with his palm so he can't let any more sounds get through.  
  
Kuroos moans turn to heavy, wet breathes filtered through Bokutos fingers as Bokuto slides his lips up and down, sucking and going to town on his dick.  
  
Fuck..fuck, fuck oh my god... is all Kuroo can think, because he can't speak at this exact moment.  
  
"Kuroo? If you're in there hiding from me I swear..." he hears Kenma shout. Bokutos mouth is quickly off of him and Kuroo would whine at the loss if he could. Bokuto tightens his grip on his mouth and grabs a tighter grip onto Kuroo as he starts to pump him fast and hard. Bokuto reaches up to kiss lightly under his ear and then suck into Kuroos neck. He ghosts his lips back up to the shell of Kuroos ear, making him shiver.  
  
"Don't make a sound," he sighs into him, and Kuroo shuts his eyes tight. He can feel himself starting to reach his peak, and he's subconsciously jerking himself up into Bokutos slick palm in an out of rhythm desperate motion. Four loud, hard knocks on the wooden door make Kuroo almost leap out of his skin, and Bokuto almost at the same level too. Kuroo remembers that he locked the door earlier and thanks any gods that will take his prayers. The knocking on the door scares a high whine from Kuroo.  
  
"If you're in there I'm wringing you neck tomorrow!" he hears Kenma yell, knocking on the door again a few times. Bokuto slips two large fingers into Kuroos mouth, reaching his throat and making him choke a little around them. Bokuto leans up again into Kuroos ear and whispers a "shh.." and Kuroo almost whines again, tongue encircling each digit in his mouth as he tries to accommodate the weird feeling in there.  
"You close?" Bokuto smiles into his skin.  
Kuroo nods his head, hears Kenmas footsteps far away, pounding angrily at the concrete.  
  
"Good, go ahead," Bokuto licks his neck, bites the juncture there, speeds up his hand a bit, and Kuroo loses it. He cums, cries out, Bokuto quickly covering his hand more on Kuroos mouth and sticking his fingers a little farther in to stop the rest of the noise from making it's way out. Kuroo chokes again, coughs mixed with rough whines as he rides out one of the most intense orgasms he thinks he's ever had. He feels too hot for comfort but the cool night air on his skin does him good. Bokuto, once he sees fit, slips his fingers from Kuroos mouth, a few long lines of saliva still sticking to them. He wipes them on the side of Kuroos shirt and then kisses his lips again, slowly, both of their lips puffy and wet from the reckless kissing. They're breathing heavy, Kuroo unable to do much but sit there and pant, waiting for the afterglow to set in. But it doesn't.  
  
"Fuck, holy shit, it's late, I gotta go," Bokuto says, and stands up. Kuroo stays there panting, the back of his head against the wall with his eyes closed as he tries to collect himself. When he finally processes what Bokuto had said, Kuroo jumps, eyes snapping open to see Bokuto already out the door.  
  
"W-wait," he says, voice hoarse, but he's already gone.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again sorry for the delay!! I'm hoping to figure out an ending soon. I promise I'm not giving up though so don't worry!!
> 
> Follow me on twitter for more Bokuto and Bokuroo related shenanigans, @owlfuker


	4. Chapter 4

A familiar buzzing sensation woke Kuroo up the next morning. It was too short to be his phone alarm, but as he rolled over and groggily reached to check, he saw that it was only a text.  
  


**From: hot boi ;)**  
**Morning!! :)**  
  


“Ah, fuck me,” he grumbled to himself, locking the screen and ignoring the text. Regretted memories of the night before flashed through his mind despite how hard he was trying to block them out. He showed 

too much submission for his liking and wouldn’t mind just lying in bed all day in shame. Not to mention, Kenma is pissed at him for “wearing headphones on the job,” which happened to be the excuse he used to explain why he didn’t respond to Kenma trying to search for him. It’s not exactly like he could just be like “oh, sorry ‘bout that buddy! I was busy getting off with Bokuto while literally working at a carnival where children come and go!” and Kenma would respond with something along the lines of, “oh, you! Just don’t do it again, you crazy kids!”

 

He wished it were that fucking simple.

 

The clock read 8:27am, which meant Kuroo had woken up about a half hour before his alarm was set to go off. That allowed him the extra half hour to maybe make coffee or shower longer, so, in a way, he was thankful that Bokuto had texted him.

 

He set the coffee pot up to start brewing while he was showering, and thankfully, his roommate, Tsukki, was still asleep on the couch. Kuroo didn’t have to energy to keep up banter that was as witty as it was bitter, which was about the extent of where his conversations with Tsukki would go. 

 

The water felt good on his skin, warm and light as he drags his hands through his hair and shakes it to wash out the shampoo. He feels clean, smiles, hums a toon lightly to himself. He grabs his little red loofa that hangs on the side of the shower and starts to wash himself when he notice a streak of dark on his skin. The soap in his eyes didn’t help, so he blinked it away and leaned his head down to inspect the dark bruise that rose on his skin near his navel. Kuroo didn’t feels so clean anymore, as he swiped his thumb back and forth over the mark, face twisting in frustration at being brought back to this... _problem_ , that he had gotten himself into. Eventually with a groan and a big sigh, he finished his shower quickly and stepped out. 

His shift started at 10 that day, but it was the first Saturday in awhile that he _wasn't_ closing, so he didn’t mind having an early clock in.  
  


What he did mind though, was receiving another text from Bokuto right as he was leaving.  
  
  


**From: hot boi ;)**

**Are you still asleep ?? I’m gonna be at the carnival again today if you’re working !**

  
  
As if having to avoid remembering the previous night was difficult enough, having to actually _see_  Bokuto, face to face, was almost nauseating. He couldn’t figure out if seeing him would be stressful because Bokuto had seen him at his most vulnerable, or if he knew there was a pretty good chance he would turn back into a blushing goddamn mess all over again if they even looked at each other a bit too long. He was gonna have to put some intense extra effort into dodging a conversation with him.

Kuroo was running out of time to develop a game plan though, seeing as he had about two minutes to leave the house if he wanted to make it to work on time without being late. He couldn't  risk that either, with Kenma already being upset with him.

He reluctantly got into his car, and by the time he pulled up to work, he had twice the amount of dread he left with. Stepping out of his car and running his fingers through his hair, he glanced over and as if God him-fucking-self wanted Kuroo to have a terrible day, he spotted the black and white streaked hair of Bokuto across the parking lot.

So he immediately got back in the car.

Pulling out his phone as fast as physically possible, he called in to tell Kenma he was too sick to come in.  
  


“Really? You’re too sick after your date with Bokuto last night?” Kenma deadpanned, clearly aggravated with Kuroo slacking off lately.  
  


“It  _wasn't_ a date,” he groaned, adding in a pseudo-cough afterwards for dramatic effect. “I just woke up feeling like shit and I don’t wanna infect a bunch of kids at the stand today. Think of the children. I’m dying.”  
  


Kenma inhaled on the other end of the call in a way that Kuroo could tell was him trying not to lose his shit. “Fine. But I don’t owe you for making you work last night now. And Tanaka’s gonna kick your ass when he finds out he has to work longer.”  
  


“Yeah, yeah, I’m not worried about Tanaka. I’m preoccupied with my own health and wellbeing.”  
  


“Whatever. You’re coming in Monday for sure though, Tetsurou. No getting out of it.”  
  


“Thanks, Kenma,” Kuroo sighed, relieved. “Love ya.”  
  


“Yeah, fuck off,” Kenma grumbled before hanging up.  
  


Kuroo had never been more thankful. He pressed his head into the back of the seat and sighed, kicking himself for being too much of a pussy to even face a boy who was kind enough to get him off literally 12 hours earlier. Speaking of the devil, Kuroo’s phone buzzed on his lap.  
  


**From: hot boi ;)**

**I guess you’re not working, I just got here. Maybe we can hang out again whenever you’re awake ??  
**   


He groaned and smacked his head against the steering wheel. “Why are you such an asshole?” He grimaced to the empty passenger seat, letting himself wallow in his own asshole-ish-ness for a few minutes before sucking it up and heading out. Just being in the carnival parking lot had given him anxiety over seeing Bokuto, so he figured if he was going to sit in his car and be emo, he could at least do it in the comfort of his own shitty parking space at his apartment building.

He refused to waste his two days off being angsty though. Eventually he got up, lingering around town and his apartment for the next couple days, catching up on doing basic household shit, like grocery shopping and cleaning the bathroom. It earned him Tsukki’s respect for more than .04 seconds, so that was a plus, but Kuroo was still struck with guilt every time he received another text from Bokuto. There were a lot more on Saturday, and they eventually stopped coming in by Sunday evening. Kuroo still felt guilty though, and he knew that he couldn’t avoid Bokuto forever. The impending doom of going to work the next day was making him twice as nervous, but he knew it was fucking now or never, and the longer he waited, the worse it would be.

He had an afternoon shift that Monday, which was good for him because his overthinking and anxieties kept him up late into the night prior, so sleeping in helped. Eventually though, he did have to haul his ass up off the couch and get to work before Kenma actually slit his throat.

He decided to be a good employee and show up a few minutes earlier than necessary, just to not seem like as much of a hooky-playing sack of shit. It paid off though, because Kenma acknowledged it upon his clocking in.

 

“You’re usually here barely on time,” he commented, not looking up from his DS. “Glad to see you’re either feeling better or sucking up.”

 

“Why not both?” he countered, half-assing a playful smile because he was too worried and exhausted to actually put forth effort into joking around today.

 

Kenma was too engrossed in his game to really notice though. “Whatever. Just go do whatever it is you do all day at the stand.”

 

“You mean work?”

 

“I can hardly call it that.”

 

Kuroo just rolled his eyes, pulling his visor over his head and heading to the dart stand, hands shoved down into his pockets and his eyes scanning the small daytime crowd for the familiar bizarre hair that would indicate that Kuroo needed to get the hell out of there.

He managed to make it to his station without seeing Bokuto though, and he felt more relieved knowing that he could worry less while within the protective barrier of 3 ½ walls surrounding him. It was a slow day, mostly just middle schoolers on their summer break and college kids who craved overpriced fried food on their lunch breaks. Good things only last so long though, because right as evening began to settle in, more people started showing up, and one of those people was exactly who Kuroo was  _not_ ready to deal with.

Bokuto was 2 stands down, trying to play a ring toss game. Kuroo  _had_ to get out of there as quickly as he could, so he leaned over to the bored teenager running the stand next to his and asked her to make sure no one messed with the dart stand while he was away. Unfortunately though, Kuroo had caught Bokuto’s eye, and he was now abandoning the ring toss and beginning to head over towards him. So, of course, Kuroo did what any rational, mature human being would do in that situation.

 

He fucking bolted.

 

He ducked out the back of the stand, running to find Kenma to see if there was anything at all that he needed to do that would relocate him to somewhere else in the park,  _anywhere_ that Bokuto wouldn’t be able to find him. But when Kuroo finally came across his boss, Kenma had no other work to give him besides carrying some boxes from storage so he could start restocking his stand, as well as delivering some of the boxes to the stands surrounding his.

Kuroo rushed to the storage trailer, grabbing a stack of boxes so tall he couldn’t really see over them, but only had a moment before he heard what sent pricks of anxiety up his spine.

“Kuroo!” a not-so-distant voice called out from behind him.

Of course it was Bokuto, and despite how childish Kuroo felt while running from him, it wasn’t as humiliating as he knew it would be to face him. So, once more, with a stack of boxes in his arms, he began to run.

 

Thankfully, the contents of each box consisted mostly of stuffed animals and little prizes and candies, because if they had been anything even a little more fragile, they would’ve been jumbled around too much to have survived the high speed chase that occurred throughout the gravel roads of the carnival grounds. People who were walking around stared and some laughed, mocking him by whispering to their friends. Bokuto was still calling after Kuroo as the two wove their ways through crowds of giggling children and confused parents, but that motherfucker was determined to lose Bokuto in the sea of people behind him.

 

By the time Kuroo made it back to his stand, the boxes were falling out of his arms. He high-jumped over the counter at his dart stand and collapsed onto the rocky ground with whatever boxes hadn’t tumbled over before he did. In retrospect, he had no idea how he thought he’d be able to lose Bokuto when he stood out more than anybody else in the entire fair. So when he stared up as puzzled golden eyes peered over the counter and down onto the ground where he lay, Kuroo sucked in a breath and let his 3 days of mistakes smack him in the face.

 

“Why were you running from me?” Bokuto asked, his brows furrowing in and his head cocking ever so slightly. “You haven’t answered my texts in days, did I do something wrong?”

 

Kuroo opened his mouth to reply, but was interrupted by Kenma bursting in through the back of the stand, practically fuming, but in the scary Kenma way where he has a look in his eyes like he’s already planned out how and when he’s going to kill you, and formulated a body disposal plan.

 

“What in the  _hell_ are you doing, Kuroo?”

 

“I was, uh, y’know...restocking.” He gave a sheepish half-smile while still on the ground trying to catch his breath, in an attempt to soften Kenma up, but failed miserably.

 

“Restocking by running through half the goddamn park and nearly knocking over everyone in your path?”

 

“I mean...when duty calls.”

 

Kenma pinched the bridge of his nose. “I almost wish you were still out sick.”

 

Bokuto’s eyes widened with concern upon discovering this new information. “Wait, you were sick? Is that why you weren't replying?”

 

“Well, no, I mean, yes? It’s...complicated.” He didn’t want to lie to Bokuto about being sick but he couldn’t say the real reason why he was avoiding him as long as Kenma was standing there. He was just overwhelmed and confused and so he took a moment to close his eyes and recollect himself before starting again. “Yes, I was sick, but that’s not the reason I wasn’t replying.”

 

Bokuto went right back to being more confused than worried. “Then what was?”

 

Kuroo realized too late he had dug himself into another shithole. Thankfully, Kenma is apathetic towards Kuroo’s personal life during work hours, so he cut off the conversation there. “Here’s a thought: Kuroo, get your ass back to work before you do even more damage, and Bokuto, please, just go find _something_ to do.”

 

Kuroo pushed himself off the ground as quickly as he could and grabbed one of the boxes that was beside him. “It won’t happen again. I’ll restock now.” Kenma nodded before returning to his own job, but Bokuto stuck around as Kuroo began to unload the box.

 

“I didn’t mean to bother you if you weren’t feeling good,” Bokuto finally said after a few minutes of tense silence.

 

“No, no, it wasn’t that,” Kuroo sighed, pausing his work for a moment to look over at Bokuto. This was one of the few times he hadn’t had a goofy smile plastered onto his face and it sent another wave of guilt through Kuroo’s insides. He kicked himself yet again for being so self-absorbed in thinking that the best way to resolve his own insecurities was to ghost somebody who had no idea what was even wrong.

 

“I wasn’t sick, I just, I don’t know,” he tried to continue, nervously scratching at the back of his neck. “I guess I psyched myself out after Friday night, y’know? Like one second we were hanging out and then the next, I was half naked on the ground and you had gone. It was just weird. It’s not like it’s your fault or anything though. I’m just fuckin’ weird about everything.”

 

“Did you not want me to do anything with you?” Bokuto asked, his own shame beginning to bloom in the pit of his stomach. “You had been dropping hints all day, and I thought what we were doing was okay and--”

 

“No, it’s not like that!” Kuroo interrupted as soon as he realized what Bo was getting at. “It’s not that I didn’t want it because like, I mean, boi, I did. I just suck at all this kind of thing and it might be a little easier on my gay-ass emotions if we just kinda moved on from it.”

 

Immediately, Bokuto’s expression fell. “Like how? Do you not wanna be friends?” 

 

“I do, I do! I had a lot of fun hanging out with you and I want to again but it’s more like, I wanna keep doing  _that_ , so I wanna try to forget about what we _did_ .”

 

“You mean me giving you a blowjob behind the stand?”

 

Way to be fucking subtle. Heat began to prick at Kuroo’s neck and ears and he sucked in a breath. “I mean, yeah. I wanna try to just, pretend it didn’t really happen. For the sake of us becoming good friends and shit.”  __  
  
Good job, dipshit. You're gonna make him think you don't like him. 

“That makes sense,” Bokuto nodded, taking a moment to process the proposition he had just been handed. “I’m cool with that! Does that mean we can hang out again soon?”

 

Kuroo breathed a sigh of relief and thanked the universe for creating Bokuto as the kind of person who doesn’t think too deeply into things. His thanks were shortly followed by curses for making  _him_  the kind of person that overthinks things, but brushed it off with a smile and held up his hand for Bo to high five him. “Hell yeah we can, bro. I get off earlier tomorrow if you wanna do something afterwards?”

  
Bokuto’s grin returned quickly as he smacked his hand against Kuroo’s and nodded. “That’s perfect! You should come over to my house and I can show you all the coolest owls that I’ve gotten. I’ll pick you up!”  
  


“Sounds like a plan,” Kuroo agreed, smiling to himself and picking up another box from the ground. “But for right now I should probably work before Kenma comes back and skins me alive. I’ll text you later, aight?”  
  


Bokuto gave him a thumbs up as he started backing away from the stand and merging into the rest of the crowd. “Cool! I’ll see ya later!” He waved one last time and then headed off into the rest of the carnival.  
  


As Kuroo started continuing to restock and deliver other boxes to their respective stands, he was completely relieved that Bokuto had been so forgiving towards his idiocy and general dickishness. He felt a warmth glowing from his chest outward when he thought about seeing Bo again the next day, but knew he had to try to ignore it for the sake of his own poor emotional self and for the sake of being friends with him without making it awkward every time they’re around each other. All he knew then was that he only had to make it through the rest of his shift that day and the next, and then he’d be able to relax and let himself just hang out with Bokuto like normal people. Just bros. Guys being dudes. Straight chillin’. At least, he hoped.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not a super large chapter for something I've been putting off.... sos I'm so sorry. I've been stripped of motivation and school is an asshole so this has been on the back burner for a really long time. Thankfully though, NaNoWriMo is on this November so I (with the help of my stupid lovely boyfriend) will both be writing together every day to try and finish this at at minimum 50k by the end of the month. Thank you anyone that has this bookmarked or anyone that likes bokuroo enough to check up on my little fics because it means a lot!!
> 
> (Follow me on Twitter: @owlfuker, for more bokuroo and bokuto related ugliness)  
> (And follow my boyfriend RJ too now!!: @kkozuken)


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> spyro and almost chill

The next 24 hours dragged on, and by the time Kuroo’s shift was ending that next day, he was practically bouncing off the walls with his impatience. He was doing everything twice as quick, which was off putting to Kenma and his co-workers to whom he was notorious for being lazy as all hell and slow, but he hardly noticed. By the time 5pm rolled around and he got to clock out, he was out of there faster than he’d ever been.

 

**To: hot boi ;)**

**yo i just got off work and im heading home now so whenever you can come get me is chill**

 

Bokuto had offered to give him a ride to his place from work but Kuroo realized shortly after that he had no other way of getting his car back home had he done that. So, he had to reveal his run-down shithole of an apartment complex to this guy who probably lived in a building at least a  _ little _ bit nicer than his own. He didn’t mind much though, as long as he met Bokuto outside and didn’t want to go upstairs into the actual apartment.

 

It wasn’t long before Kuroo was sitting in the passenger seat, Bokuto behind the wheel. He was babbling on about his day as Kuroo grew less and less engaged in the conversation and more focused on where he was being taken. The town Kuroo lived in, as most areas do, had a very distinct neighborhood that was known to locals as the rich part of town. Not just rich either, like, gated community, 9-foot-tall-statue-of-a-horse-in-one-front-yard, my-dad’s-lawyer-could-kick-your-dad’s-lawyer’s-ass, million-dollar-home level of rich part of town. He didn’t even know anyone who had ever gone through the pearly gates into the land of champagne and butlers, yet Bokuto was taking the road that led directly to it.

 

“Uh, dude, you know you can’t take a shortcut through here right?” Kuroo had finally interjected. “You can’t get into this neighborhood without a keycard.”

 

“Huh? I know,” Bokuto replied, puzzled. Realization set in, and as he saw them pull up to the gate and hand the keeper a card, Kuroo nearly  _ gasped _ .

 

“You...you live here?”

 

“Yeah! I didn’t realize it was so far from where you lived,” he smiled obliviously, taking back his card and heading through the now open gates. “I think I live closer to your job than you do.”

 

“I guess so,” Kuroo murmured, trailing off as he drove past literal mansion after mansion, before finally arriving at the driveway of the last place he expected Bokuto to live in.

 

Before him was a multi-level, pale gray villa surrounded by shrubbery and trees that were sprinkled through with flowers that looked so picturesque that there seemed like there was no possible way this was actually a real home, as opposed to the kind of thing you’d see on a postcard. Bokuto parked the car and excitedly gestured for Kuroo to follow him in.

 

_ There’s no way he’s genuinely this oblivious to how amazing this house is, right?  _ he thought to himself, only to realize that Bo really was that unaware.

 

The stone steps that led from the driveway to the heavy, wooden door were almost magic--lined with flowers and greenery and those little statues that are the kind of things that grandmas keep in their gardens. Bokuto explained all the stuff as he went along, saying that his mother was obsessed with home designs and worked tediously on the front yard. Arriving at the door, the trim was unusually pristine for it being the side that has to weather the outdoors, but Kuroo assumed that must also be part of the upkeep that Bokuto’s mom does. The door creaked open, revealing a massive foyer; to the left was a massive dark staircase that seemingly separated two halves of the house, and to the right was an archway leading into a front room. On the wall that faced the door, a golden-framed landscape painting hung above an ivory grand piano with a side table stacked high with books of sheet music. Though the floor was hardwood, a geometric area rug laid beneath the piano, detailed with pale blues and yellows and navy accents to lead the eye. The ceiling went up for what felt like miles, and Kuroo’s eye was met with a crystal chandelier that glistened with incandescent lighting, throwing light across the entire room. 

 

And that was just what he saw upon walking in.

 

Bokuto lead him through the open doorway on the right, which opened up into a living room type of area. The wall facing outwards was entirely windows, overlooking the front yard, and in the framing corners of the room stood mirroring statues, clearly modeled after Renaissance sculpture styles. A stone-lined fireplace was on the wall adjacent to the windows. The mantle displayed a family photo, arranged in the center of potted plants that were overgrown to give the set-up an almost mystical feel to it. The back wall had a bookshelf almost the height of the ceiling, filled with all kinds of books and encyclopedias. Two Victorian chairs faced it at an angle with a small circular coffee table resting between them. Bokuto explained that this room served more of a purpose for guests that his parents wanted to maintain a sophisticated image for, and that through the door to the left was the basement, which had couches and a television and even more bookshelves with even more content. 

 

“I can show you that later though,” he stated casually, as if the first two rooms were just boring show-y things that couldn’t hold Kuroo’s interest. “Oh! I forgot I have snacks for us before I bring you upstairs!”

 

He grabbed Kuroo by the wrist and pulled him back through the foyer and around the other side of the staircase, which appeared to be a dining room. The oak table in the center of the room was big enough to comfortably fit eight chairs, and several bowls of chips and a plate of cheese and crackers was set out. All around the room were more elegant paintings and photographs, potted plants, and sculptures. Bokuto gestured for Kuroo to sit, and he did, still completely awestruck. By the time the two were seated, Bokuto was already chattering on about how his day had been going, and how he got this cool new video game the night before that was all he had been playing, and all kinds of other things before Kuroo finally had it in him to actually speak.

 

“Uh, bro...what do you  _ do _ for a living?” was all he sputtered out.

 

“I deliver pizzas!” he grinned proudly.

 

Kuroo determined that there wasn’t really a way to ask _“no, I mean, how are you clearly loaded and I didn’t know about it?”_ without sounding like a dick, so he just nodded.  
  
“That’s a lot cooler than my job.”

 

“What!? It’s definitely not! I’d kill to have a job as cool as working at a carnival!”

 

“I guess it could be worse,” he shrugged. “You actually like going there though. To me, it’s kinda just become routine. Pays the bills and shit.”

 

“If you ever have an opening you should hire me,” Bokuto said, eyes lighting up at the thought of working there. “Then we could work together and it’d be so fun!”

 

“I’ll put in a good word for you next time we’re hiring,” Kuroo chuckled, starting to snack on the food that was laid out for them.

 

The two continued on with their usual conversations, talking about work and their days and anything interesting that may have been going on in life, all the usual, until Bokuto got too excited to wait anymore and was practically dying to take Kuroo upstairs to show him all of his owls.

 

After storming up the stairs, Kuroo noticed how long and huge the hallway was, and how many doors there were, like, Jesus, how many rooms could they need? Judging by the family photo that was in the front room, Bokuto was an only child. There were at least eight doors. He brushed off the thought though as it was revealed which door was Bokuto’s by him pushing through it and proudly holding his arms out to display his insane amount of owls.

 

“Look at them!” he insisted, starting to pick up several and give them a squeeze.

 

Against the wall was a bookcase, but rather than being filled with books, it was owls. Plushies and porcelain figures and statues of all kinds, with the wall behind the display being plastered with different photographs and drawings of owls. Any possible owl-related object was there, and Bokuto was happily beginning to describe each one, its name, and its origin.

 

“ _ This _ one is Swoops, I found him at the grocery store one day and he was too cute to pass up, like, how could you say no to these eyes?” he asked, holding up a plush owl with big glittering plastic eyes. “He’s so cool.”

 

Kuroo nodded along as he continued to introduce all of his owls, slowly growing more entranced by, not so much as the owls, but just the way Bokuto talked about them. He found himself almost getting lost how ecstatic he was to tell each one’s story, and his train of thought led him into imagining how excited he would get to talk about Kuroo to other people. If he babbled on about meeting him and talking to him and kissing him and--

 

_ Wait, fuck. You can’t be doing that shit,  _ he shuddered out of the train of thought.  _ You’re bros, remember? For fuck’s sake. Just bros. Guys being dudes. Straight chillin’. _

 

“And last but not least,” Bokuto concluded as Kuroo tuned back in. “This is the one that you gave me at the carnival the night we met!” He held up a familiar plush and hugged it close. “I haven’t decided on a name yet; I want it to be perfect.”

 

Now Kuroo couldn’t help but feel the slightest blush spread across his face. Why did Bokuto have to be so goddamn sentimental and cute? It wasn’t helping the whole ‘just bros’ thing. “I’m sure you’ll be able to think of something eventually. I’ll tell you if I come up with any good ideas for him.”

 

“Okay!” he grinned, setting the owl down and going to sit on his bed. It was only then that Kuroo realized how big is room was. And his bed.

 

It had all white walls and a soft dark grey carpet. On the same wall as the owl bookshelf was a desk with all kinds of drawers and compartments, scattered with miscellaneous change and clutter and receipts. He felt a little more relieved to see it; it was a lot less intimidating to see that some stuff of Bokuto’s was just as unorganized as his. Being in such an enormous, well put together house was making him second guess all of his own daily cleaning habits and pretty much all of the cheap shit he owned. 

 

Beyond just the wall with his desk and bookshelf, there was Bokuto’s king sized bed, jutting out from a window framed by billowy curtains. To the right of it was what seemed to be a closet, and a small bathroom that both branched off from that wall. To the left, there was a TV mounted on his wall and underneath was a table with speakers and a couple of game systems, controllers and disks scattered on the floor around it. 

 

“If you want, I can show you how to play the game I got yesterday!” he enthused, leaning over off the side of his bed to start setting up his console. “It’s multi-player!”

 

Kuroo was totally down to play, but what he wasn’t totally down with was being in close proximity to Bokuto while sitting on his bed with no one else around. As much as he wanted to keep on believing his mantra of them being just bros, guys being dudes, straight chillin’, it’s not like he could deny exactly how gay he actually was. And he was nervous as all hell that one move could make him melt again and just toss out the attempt at being just bros completely.

 

Everything was going fine though, actually. The two were playing the new game that Bokuto had gotten, which wasn’t really a new game and Kuroo wasn’t really playing but just watching Bokuto play. The game was an old one for the Playstation 2, an old Spyro game that Kuroo knew Tsukki loved because he would play it for the ‘nostalgia’ and blast it too high when Kuroo was trying to nap. Knowing it was a kid’s game, it fit Bokuto well, but Kuroo thought it looked kind of fun for something so old and so not for someone like him.

 

Bokuto had just defeated a boss when he looked to Kuroo, cross-legged on his bed and a soft smile on his face as he watched the TV. He turned to Bokuto though, when the small purple dragon that Bokuto was controlling stopped in his tracks.

 

“Hey,” Bokuto says, “Do you want to try?”

 

Kuroo smiles a little, nods his head. Bokuto hands him the controller with a smile and hands that lingered a little too long on his own.    
  


Kuroo was, for what felt like the hundredth time that day, kicking himself internally for being so gay around Bokuto. Just the brush of his fingers sent him into some emotional swirl of school-girl level sensations, as if nothing but touch could send him so high up into the clouds that, only if for a moment, he would be able to walk on air. Like each time their skin made contact, he was ripped from reality and brought back to that night under the dart stand, every movement of Bokuto’s hands, his body, his mouth, whether soft or intense, was all rushing back through him in just an instant.

 

_ And holy shit, Tetsurou, what the fuck happened to just bros? _

 

He shook himself out of his thoughts, trying to accomplish the feat of ignoring emotions until they go away, but he had never been good at that. So, he told himself he wasn’t going to ignore them as much as just put them aside for later, and he began to play Spyro.

 

It was a lot easier to be at ease around Bokuto from then on, because most of their interaction for awhile after was Kuroo fucking something up, and Bokuto explaining in detail how to do the next step. It’s not like he just described what to do next either; he got up, went over to the TV, and used his entire body to physically explain what each step was. It was quickly becoming more entertaining to watch him go on about how to play the game than it was to actually play the game himself. By the end of the night though, he was developing a miserable tendency to get a little too into the mini tutorials he was receiving for each task. The last one, particularly, had him locked into watching the movement of Bo’s mouth. It got him wondering if he was ever that animated when he spoke. It was kind of mesmerizing, just the way he was so passionate about something as small as a game about a dragon, like he was his own hype man when it came to anything he was even remotely interested in.

 

“Kuroo?” Bokuto said, pulling Kuroo out of his trance by waving to catch his attention. “Were you listening?”

 

“What? Oh, uh, sorry, I got distracted,” he murmured, blinking a couple of times to try to regain focus.

 

“You were staring at me but you weren’t listening.”

 

Heat rushed to his neck and ears. “I was just, zoning out, y’know? It’s getting kind of late, and I just, like, happened to be looking towards you as I was out of it.”

 

Thankfully, that was a good enough answer for Bokuto because he just shrugged it off. “Are you tired? I can take you home now if you want.”

 

“I mean, I’m a little tired, but I don’t really wanna go home. Maybe we can just take a break from the game for a little bit.”

 

“That works!” Bokuto grinned, shutting down the Playstation and plopping back down beside Kuroo. “What do you wanna do now?”

 

Fuck. “I didn’t think that far ahead.”

 

“We can just talk I guess. I can tell you more stuff about me, and I can learn more stuff about you!”

 

“That’s fine with me,” Kuroo nodded. “What do you wanna know about me?”

 

“Well, what are you studying at school? Or, are you in school?”

 

“Oh, uh, yeah, I go to community college near here,” he began, scratching at the back of his neck like he does when he’s nervous. “I know it’s cheesy, but I’m an art major. As if I weren’t broke enough already.”

 

Bokuto’s eyes lit up though. “You like art? What kind of art do you do?”

 

Kuroo relaxed a little, feeling relieved that Bokuto was genuinely fascinated with what he does. “Oh, well, I like to do traditional drawing mostly. Sometimes I paint though.”

 

“What do you like to draw?”

 

“Animals, mostly. I like drawing fur a lot; I’m really detail-oriented, so cats and dogs are really fun to do even though I complain about wanting to die the entire time I do it.”

 

“That is so cool!” Bo enthused, clapping his hands together and scooting nearer to Kuroo. “Do you have any drawings you can show me? Like, on your phone or something?”

 

“Ah, fuck, I don’t have any pictures on this phone. I can take some when I get home and show you when I see you next though?”

 

“Okay! I can come visit when you’re working.”

 

“That works,” Kuroo smiled, wiping his sweaty palms down his thighs. “What are you studying?”

 

“Zoology!” he exclaimed, perking up even more. “I love learning about animals and I take about a billion classes on birds so it’s like heaven.”

 

_Oh my god that is so cute_ , Kuroo thought as he began to zone out, losing himself in his excitement.

 

“Wait, what?” Bokuto said, stopping in his tracks and a blush forming on his cheeks.

 

“What?”

 

“Did you just...call me cute?”

 

Did he say that out loud? Bokutos puzzled look explains to him the answer.

 

Kuroo didn’t even know what to fucking do. Is he seriously that distracted by this big, bird-loving idiot that he can’t even keep his thoughts to himself? He had no idea how he was gonna weasel his way out of this one, but he felt the pierce of golden eyes send a chill up his spine. Once he brought himself to look back up at Bokuto, he was locked in. His pupils became crystallized fossils of a million years trapped within amber, struck through with bronze. He felt like he was watching it all melt away to let him in as his eyes began to soften, leaning in slightly, drawing Kuroo in closer and closer. They were hardly an inch apart, close enough for Bokuto’s breath to send pricks of warmth across Kuroo’s upper lip.

 

And then he snapped out of it.

 

“I have to piss,” he blurted out, cutting the moment short and getting up. 

 

“Oh, uh, the bathroom is right there,” he said, gesturing to the door that was slightly opened on his back wall. 

 

“I’ll just, uh, find another one,” he stuttered, heading off into the hallway as quickly as he could. Thankfully, the nearest bathroom had its door cracked open as well, so he burst into it and nearly slammed the door shut. 

 

“You fucking _idiot_ ,” he hissed at himself in the mirror, pulling his fingers through his hair. “Nice Scott Pilgrim moment, asshole.”

 

He paced back and forth for a second before giving up and sitting on the lid of the toilet, bouncing his leg up and down.

 

_Okay, so you kind of almost kissed him,_ he thought bitterly, trying to calm himself down. _You can probably just no homo your way out of it. Or call Tanaka for a ride home. But FUCK you can’t get into the neighborhood without a card or a resident letting you in._

 

He tried coming up with a game plan that didn’t involve him having to go back in and face Bokuto for longer than 0.4 seconds, but failed. The longer he was in the bathroom, the weirder it would be to return, so after a few more seconds of internal conflict hell, he splashed some water on his face and attempted to go back into Bokuto’s room as casually as he could.

 

“I can take you home now, if you want,” Bokuto said upon seeing him. “It is getting kinda late.”

 

Kuroo nodded. “Yeah, I have some homework and shit to do anyway, so…”

 

“Is it art homework?”

 

“Uh, yeah.”

 

“Will you send me a picture of it when you finish?” Bo smiled. He didn’t want there to be tension either, and Kuroo thanked the heavens for giving him a conversation transition.

 

“I probably won’t finish this assignment tonight, but I’ll send you a progress update, sure.” He nodded to Bokuto, a little more relieved.

 

“Cool!” he grinned, hopping up and grabbing his car keys. “Don’t forget either!”

 

“I’ll try not to. Remind me in an hour or two so I don’t.”

 

Bokuto gave a thumbs up, leading Kuroo back out of the mansion. The car ride home wasn’t too bad; they listened to the radio as a good distraction, and Kuroo told Bo more about his art. He hadn’t ever really had someone who was really interested in what he did, except for his classmates who were also art majors. It was kinda cool having someone who would like his art from a viewing standpoint, as opposed to the more critical standpoint of another artist who does the same thing.

 

Bokuto eventually pulled up in front of Kuroo’s apartment to drop him off. “I had a lot of fun today, Kuroo!” he grinned as he said his goodbyes. “We definitely need to hang out again soon.”

 

“Of course,” Kuroo smiled back, refusing to acknowledge the blush rising on his cheeks, and stepped one foot out of the car. “Also, Bokuto?”

 

“Hm?”

 

“Text me when you get back home so I know you got back alright.”

 

“Sure thing!” he nodded, waving farewell as Kuroo headed back into his apartment.

 

The moment Kuroo got into his room, he collapsed onto the bed in a ball of nothing but stress, shame, and regret. He needed to pull his head out of his ass and stop being so _gay_  every time he was around Bokuto. I mean, maybe it was just because it was the first time they'd hung out since that night. That had to be it, right? From here on out, it was gonna be all good. No homo. Just bros. Straight chillin’. He refused to let it get any gayer than that.

 

He willed himself up after a few more songs’ worth of existential self loathing, because he actually did have a project to be working on. He picked up his drawing board with the _sketch_ attached and began gently etching away against the paper. The piece he was working on now was a black cat, lying half in the sun and half in the shade of a window. The goal is to portray the effect of the light source in a realistic and visually appealing way, but really it was just Kuroo apparently hating himself enough to take on a challenge.

 

Only a few minutes into his work, his phone buzzed.

 

**From: hot boi ;)**

**I got home ok!! Don’t forget to send me a picture of your drawing!!!!**

 

Kuroo smiled to himself, working on his piece for another hour and a half before giving up and deciding to go to bed. He sent a picture of it to Bokuto first though, and as he lied down, a reply came through. 

 

It was a blurred selfie of Bokuto, his mouth open in shock and awe, and the caption “ **HOLY FUCKING SHIT KUROO THAT IS REALLY GOOD** .” 

 

He couldn’t help but grin as wide as he could and let a blush creep over his face--at least no one was around to see how gay he was being over this. He was growing too tired to mind. He shot Bokuto a reply of “thank you so much I am Suffering” before putting his phone underneath his pillow and dozing off.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two updates only a few days apart from each other. I'm so thankful NaNoWriMo has gotten me off my lazy ass :')
> 
> Follow me @owlfuker and my boyfriend RJ whose helping me out on this fic for nanowrimo too, @kkozuken!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All of a sudden it’s hot. So hot and it’s hard to breathe.

A few weeks of hanging out at work and taking lunch breaks together, and Bokuto finally asked the million dollar question.  


“Can we hang out at your place sometime?” he inquired one night, loitering around the dart stand to chat with Kuroo when Kenma wasn't looking.  


Kuroo stopped in his tracks. “I mean, sure. But my place is kinda boring and shitty, why do you wanna come over?”  
 

“You've been to my house! And besides, I wanna see all your art in person.”  
 

“But why?”  
 

“Because every time you send me a picture you complain because it supposedly looks better in person.”  
 

Oh yeah. “I guess you're right.”  
 

“So does that mean I can come over?” Bokuto looked expectant, his big ol’ eyes hopeful that Kuroo would say yes.

   
So, of course, he did. “Sure.”

   
Bokuto lit up. “Nice! When are you free next?”

  
“Uh, shit, probably this weekend. Friday night we can hang out or something.”

   
They solidified plans for the weekend then, and Kuroo was greeted with a familiar anxious excitement. He swore to himself that he’d do better with controlling his schoolgirl infatuation this time around, and he planned to stick to it.

The day finally arrived, and after helping Bokuto scavenge for parking in the undersized lot, Kuroo led him into his apartment complex. He was nervous, clearly, because he didn’t want Bo to think he lived in a complete shithole, especially in comparison to Bokuto’s house, which is one of the nicest homes available in this town. He tried his best to keep cool though; it probably would’ve wound up way worse had his insecurities gotten the best of him.

“Okay, I am gonna warn you now though,” he began as they were in the elevator on the way up. “My roommate’s not exactly the best.”

“What do you mean?”

“He’s the kind of motherfucker who does nothing but sit his ass on the couch all day,” he grimaced, thoroughly disgusted even thinking about it as they walked towards his door to begin unlocking it. “He’s the kind of shitty, Reddit-using, neckbeard meninist with Cheeto-dusted fingers that is the scum of the earth.”

Bokuto definitely didn’t look too thrilled to have to be meeting the guy that fit that description, but upon opening the door, they were met with a glance from a tall, lanky, blond dude sitting on the couch. His hair was kept short, he wore glasses, and he definitely looked as clean and normal as any other college kid, and definitely wasn’t the greasy, brony type that Kuroo had described.

Nonetheless, he still curled in horror as he saw him. “This is Tsukki. He’s a sociopath and a sapiosexual. Look at him. Disgusting.”

  
Tsukki glared at them, and with a mouth full of unsalted saltine crackers, hissed, “Fuck you.” Crumbs flew out of his mouth.

  
Bokuto awkwardly waved to him before leaning in Kuroo’s ear and asking, “What’s a sapiosexual?”

  
“I’ll explain later,” he told him, shaking his head.

  
Bokuto would most likely forget to think about it again, because he became immediately enthralled in Kuroo’s apartment.

  
The flat could barely be called much more than a studio. Upon walking in, they were met with the kitchen that contained nothing but necessities, with a small round table that seated two people that was in the middle of the room. The only distinction between the kitchen and living room was that it changed from tile to carpet, and all there was to the living room was a couch, a beanbag chair, and a lamp that all faced towards a TV and a Play Station that belonged to Tsukki. The living room led to a short hallway with a closet, a bathroom, and then Tsukki and Kuroo’s respective bedrooms. The rooms themselves could hardly be classified as more than just closets, honestly.

  
Bokuto was completely obsessed with it though.

   
“This place is amazing!” he exclaimed, touching his hand to the wallpaper. “It’s so cozy and vintage! Look at all this!”

   
He ran over to the kitchen and pointed at the microwave. “I didn’t even know people used this in real life! Is it a microwave?”

   
Kuroo raised an eyebrow as he watched him go nuts over everything. “Uh, yeah dude, that’s a microwave.” He heard Tsukki snicker from the couch.

   
Bokuto began opening up drawers and pulling out random things, such as cup ramen and microwaveable mac n’ cheese, asking what each thing is and how it works. His unfamiliarity with broke college life almost made Kuroo jealous, but he was more focused on watching Bo get overly excited about things again.

   
“What’s this on the wall!?” he asked, practically bouncing as he pointed to a dark spot.

   
“Mildew,” Tsukki deadpanned, giving Kuroo a side glance that definitely said he never wanted Bokuto over again.

   
“Wow!” he grinned, starting to make his way towards the hallway. “Can I see your room?”

   
“Oh, uh, fugg, sure,” he nodded. The realization that Bokuto was now going to see his cluttered disaster of a bedroom was only just hitting him.

   
“Fugg?” he asked quizzically. Kuroo also didn’t realize that not everyone speaks in exclusively variations of the word ‘fuck.’

   
“Uh, I guess it’s just my way of saying fuck but uglier.” That was the only way he really could explain it.

   
Bo seemed to like it though apparently. “Wow! Poor people slang!”

   
Tsukki cleared his throat in a way that Kuroo knew meant he not only never wanted Bokuto over again, but in that moment, he just fucking hated him. Kuroo mostly just nervous laughed his way through it, leading Bokuto into his room.

   
“It’s not much but, y’know, I’ve got a bed so that’s all I really need.”

   
He wasn’t wrong either. The contents of his room didn’t expand much beyond a full mattress on the floor, surrounded by piles of blankets and artwork and his laptop. Posters of his favorite bands from high school were taped up all over the place, even some that he had outgrown. His closet had a sliding door that was cracked open because he had let the clothes pile up enough that he couldn’t close it all the way. His dresser sat across from his bed, and on it was a boxy TV with an old DVD player, both of which Kuroo had found at thrift stores and fixed up.

   
“It’s so cool in here!” Bokuto grinned, flopping himself down onto the bed and pulling a few blankets over himself. “It must be so comfy sleeping like this.”

   
“Yeah, I can never sleep if I’m cold, so I gotta stay well prepared for if the temperature drops,” Kuroo chuckled, sitting on the edge of the mattress. “Did you, um, wanna see my art stuff?”

   
“Is that even a question?” Bokuto laughed, sitting up and readjusting so Kuroo could showcase his work.

   
They spent a good amount of time shuffling through papers and sketchbooks, finished and unfinished pieces, and with each one, Bokuto was more and more amazed. He had such an admiration for the arts because of his parents, Kuroo learned, and that also explained why there was so much artwork displayed around his home. Eventually, they ran out of drawings to look at, and Kuroo realized he had absolutely nothing planned.

   
“There’s, uh, not much to really do around here, did you have anything in mind?” he asked, borderline sheepishly.

   
Bokuto pondered for a minute before pointing at the TV. “Why don’t we watch a movie?”

   
“I’m down. What kind of movie do you wanna watch?”

   
“Well, what kind of movies do you have?”

   
Kuroo hadn’t thought about that. He went over and started to dig around in his drawer full of unorganized DVD cases, only to realize he has a lot more box sets of TV shows as opposed to actual decent movies. He panicked, grabbing the first interesting show he found, and held it up to Bokuto. “We could watch Rick & Morty. It’s one of my favorite shows, and we’d probably have a better time watching this than some of the shit movies I have in here.”

   
“Okay!” Bokuto grinned, scooting over on Kuroo’s bed to make room for him. “What’s it about?”

   
Ah fuck. “Um, it’s kinda like if Back to the Future were a little more fucked up. Like if Doc Brown was an alcoholic and Marty McFly was an awkward horny 14 year old.”

   
“So...it’s exactly like Back to the Future?”

   
“Basically. But funnier.”

 

Kuroo popped the DVD in the player and settled in beside Bo, tossing a blanket over their laps. Bokuto snuggled in close, head on Kuroo’s shoulder, and Kuroo tried desperately not to do anything gay, think anything gay, think of thinking of anything gay that he could possibly think of. The first episode they decided on watching was obviously the pilot, but then Kuroo proceeded to only show Bokuto his favorites. On his absolute favourite, Rixty Minutes, the improvisational episode where the voice actors got to go nuts as Rick made a cable box that could get infinite realities of TV. Kuroo gave a gross snorting laugh at one of the jokes, and seized up and went to cover his nose area with his hand, attempting to apologize. But when he turned his head a little he saw the best (or maybe worst in that situation) sight of his life. Bokuto was sleeping on his shoulder, looking comfy with his hand lightly resting on Kuroo’s forearm. He barely made any noise as he breathed through his mouth; it was soft, just like how he looked. He looked soft, warm, and Kuroo felt his heart skip a beat just for a moment. Like a tiny animal asleep in your lap, he didn’t want to move to wake Bokuto up, to break him out of his pure and blissful state. Kuroo hesitantly slipped his fingers through Bokuto’s hair, flattening the strands against his scalp. Kuroo cupped the side of Bokuto’s head and gently laid him down on his bed. He clicked his tongue at the position Bo was in now, head and upper body on Kuroo’s bed while his legs lay in a weird bundle off of the side. Kuroo decided to wake him up. He leans in, whispers into the sleeping face.

   
“Hey, Bokuto, wake up,” he says.

   
Golden eyes crack open and offer him a few blinks, and a voice saying “wha…?” confused and sleepy.

   
“You’re asleep, Bokuto, just crawl up here for a sec,” he says, helping Bokuto to sit up. He does as he’s told, crawling to the top part of the bed and almost immediately collapsing down on the pillows. Kuroo covers him in a blanket, watches Bokuto instantly fall back asleep. Kuroo huffs, looks at his clock, and watches the red numbers flicker from 11:23 to 11:24. He climbs into the blankets next to Bokuto, and uses the remote to pick a different Rick and Morty episode on the TV to watch. He does, and the bright glow of the TV is the only light in the room.

   
After about an episode and a half, the bright light he’s been staring at begins to make his eyes feel heavy and warm, each blink an invitation to close them completely.

   
_just one more episode..._

   
Rick pulls out his gun to shoot an alien, Kuroo’s head nods down. Morty yells something incoherent, the last thing in his mind before he gives in to sleep.

 

All of a sudden it’s hot. So hot and it’s hard to breathe.

 

“You look so good like this,” says a voice from behind him. A hand is on his lower back, sliding up to his shoulder blades to strongly push Kuroo down until his face is smothered in a pillow. All he can do is moan into it as his hands twitch at his sides to try to push himself up but he’s held in place. His ass in the air, legs quivering in a barely working attempt to hold himself up. Something hot flashes in his abdomen and he realizes there are two fingers inside of him, pushing and stretching him open. A chaste kiss is placed on his tailbone, and for some reason the affection makes Kuroo stir just a little more. The voice is near his ear now, breathy and hot, just to give him goosebumps and make the fine hairs on the back of his neck stand up, “Can you take another one, beautiful?”  
  
Kuroo verges forward and mushes his face further into the pillow at the sweet talk he’s getting, flushing scarlet all the way to the ends of his ears and splotchy down his neck. The fingers rub harder on his prostate, and Kuroo tugs and pulls at the pillow he’s buried in some kind of attempt to escape but also push back at the overwhelming pleasure being given to him.

   
“I didn’t hear you,” the voice whispers, “what was that?”

   
Kuroo groans, loudly, before his hair is forcibly yanked up from behind him and he gasps, pants out a “yes.” The person wasn’t satisfied however, as the fingers stilled but pressed just a little harder into him, and Kuroo positively whines out a “please, please….” before his hair is let go of and his head collapses back onto the pillow. Another finger wiggles in beside the two, and they’re reaching into him and stretching him open in a slow but sensual burn that makes Kuroo’s hips push back against the fingers.

He’s flipped over onto his back, gasping for a breath that he didn’t know he was holding. The person above him was none other than Bokuto.

“B-Bokuto…!?” Kuroo says, eyes open and bewildered at the guy above him, travelling down his body, all whipcord muscles and sweaty skin. He swallows the saliva building in his mouth, looks back up into Bokuto’s eyes. He smiles confidently.

“You looked so pretty while you slept, I just couldn’t help myself,” he says, bringing a hand to Kuroo’s face, thumb swiping the little bit of drool that formed at the side of Kuroo’s mouth. Two fingers slip easily back into him and farther inside of his ass as Bokuto kisses Kuroo open mouthed and hot against his panting lips. Kuroo opens his mouth for a breath and Bokuto slips him a bit of his tongue, to tease him, to make him want more. When Bokuto pulls off and goes to do it again, Kuroo catches his tongue between his lips, sucks it for a moment and then bites the bottom of Bokuto’s lips. He laughs, curves his fingers in deeper while sticking the third one back inside of him. Bokuto presses back into Kuroos prostate, hard, relentlessly fucking into him and Kuroo throws his head back and moans loudly. Bokuto laughs again, captures Kuroo’s lips in his own, let’s Kuroo moan broken into Bokuto’s mouth. Kuroo can feel himself reaching his peak, and he brings his hand down to his untouched dick, stroking quickly and desperately as Bokuto sucks and bites on his lips. Bokuto whispers mantras of “beautiful, gorgeous, cute, so so pretty,” into Kuroo’s mouth. The praise has him coming quickly, Bokuto’s name on Kuroos lips as Bokuto continues to whisper seductively “so so good” again and again against his ear until Kuroo sees sparks behind his eyes. Cum painting his chest and Bokuto’s above him, he sees Bokuto grin with half lidded sparkling eyes. He says something that Kuroo doesn’t catch right away.

   
“W-what?” he whispers, voice hoarse and quiet. Bokuto says nothing, but his lips read  _wake up, Kuroo_  
  
He opens his eyes, hands twitching and body coming back to life in a hot sweat. He hears the faint sound of the television and Rick Sanchez’s voice, “When you die in a dream you die in real life, Morty!” Kuroo’s eyes blink rapidly, trying to take in what’s going on. He feels dirty, sweaty and wet in his pants as Kuroo blinks his sleepy eyes open and takes in the man lying next to him. Bokuto is sleeping soundly, chest slowly rising with the blankets. The realization sets in quickly.

   
Kuroo whispers, “Fuck! Fuck, fuck oh my god” angrily under his breath as he whips the blankets up over himself and stands up from the bed. He feels the wetness in his pants and feels disgusted as he runs to the bathroom, turns the lights on and cringes from the sudden blinding light. He checks his pants and in his underwear, and low and behold, he fucking came in his pants.

   
“Are you fucking kidding me!?” Kuroo says, looking up into the bathroom mirror and leaning in to stare at his dark hazy eyes, “Are you in ninth grade again Kuroo? What are you doing!?”

   
Kuroo’s appalled at himself. He cleans himself up with toilet paper before he’s running back into his room for a change of clothes. He slips on loose boxers and tries to crawl back into bed and immediately go back to sleep. He can’t, eyes glued open and staring at the boy sleeping soundly next to him, his sweat on the sheets turning cold and annoying on his flushed hot skin, a silent reminder.

   
Kuroo can’t take it. He stands back up, runs his hands through his hair. He paces around his room biting his fist, runs out to the living room and past Tsukki, who is lying and drooling on the couch to the kitchen. He shakily goes to make himself some coffee, realizes they’re out of coffee, runs back to his room and loudly searches for some pajama pants, grabs his keys, his wallet, and bolts out of his apartment and down the street at 2:30 in the morning.

 

He bursts through the front doors, breathing heavily. The eyes of about 3 people, all cashiers, fall on him. He doesn’t pay them a passing glance, running to the back aisles. Kuroo swings a freezer door open and pulls out strawberry shortcake ice cream, sits down on the cold grocery store floor with his back against the freezer doors, and pops the lid. Icy mist from the open door froths out onto the ground, cooling Kuroo’s skin and nipping him through his pajama pants. The ice cream wasn’t completely hard, thank god, and Kuroo is too far gone at this point to care about what he’s doing; he’s lying on a grocery stores floor at 3am already, so he pushes his social normalities aside and sticks his hand into the ice cream tub, scooping it out and eating it like an animal. He’s mumbling to himself, angry but confused and he’s so damned exhausted he doesn’t want to deal with anything else anymore. Just lie on the ground and eat ice cream until he dies. His head is swimming, the lights above him way too bright and blinding his eyes, the only sound is the soft hum of the freezers. His head pounds with each scoop of ice cream, and every time he closes his eyes images of Bokuto from his dream flash behind his eyelids. He tries to get those pictures out of his head, but he soon realizes telling yourself not to think about something over and over is stupid because you just think about it more. The memory, which Kuroo guesses he could call his favourite, would be the time Kuroo and Bokuto were on the ferris wheel at the carnival. A head of black and gray hair silhouetted by the pretty orange and pink sunset in the distant sky, sun dancing on his skin like some sort of fairy tale. Warm. Kuroo felt warm in that moment, simple and easy to put into words. Warmth that travelled from his heart up his arms, reaching his neck and pulling a gasp from him whenever Bokuto flashed a smile. Kuroo put the tub of ice cream down and folded his arms over his legs, tucking his head inside the crook of one arm. More memories, the view of Bokuto from behind as he tugs him like a child towards another roller coaster, he can almost hear the hurried footsteps on the stone walkways. Excitedly waving his hands at a kids video game, ecstatic and invested in something he’s never heard of, he’s never seen someone get this passionate over. Smiles and glances and pretty yellow eyes, long lashes resting onto rose dusted cheekbones as he slept peacefully on Kuroo’s shoulder. Kuroo smiled to himself.

   
The announcement of the stores closing brings him back to his position on the cold floors of a grocery store. He sighs, heavy and weighted, hoping such a large breath will take these weird pitiful feelings with it. It take Kuroo a few minutes to convince himself that he’s not allowed to just go to sleep right then and there, or else he’ll end up in the newspaper tomorrow morning. He stands up, sways a little, closes the door behind him as he neatly snaps the lid back onto the ice cream. He walks up to the cash, grabs himself a soda and a chocolate bar because he’s just that exhausted, and plops it all on the belt. Every time Kuroo blinks his eyes burn, and he wants desperately to scratch them, but instead he pulls out his wallet. The person working, a tiny girl around his age, maybe in highschool, with a pretty blonde short haircut, who seemed a little too friendly to be working the night shift at the local grocery store, smiled at him. Kuroo mustered a smile back but he knew he probably looked absolutely insane at the moment. She asked him something, but his head was pounding, so he leaned in, closing his eyes and tried to concentrate when he asked what she said.

   
“Would you like a bag?” she said, and Kuroo tapped his debit card on the machine as she asked. He chuckled to himself, raspy and worn out.

   
“I think I have enough,” he says, and she doesn’t seem to get it. She gives him a nervous laugh and he grabs his stuff and turns to leave. He’s not thinking well enough so he quickly turns on his heels and looks at her.

   
“Y’know because I’m tired,” he says, points at the bags under his eyes, “I have bags under….my eyes” he sighs. She smiles a little at Kuroo’s attempt to relieve the tension from before.

   
“I can see that,” she laughs a little. Kuroo smiles a bit at that, before turning around and strutting out of the store and back into his car.

   
When he gets back home, he goes to put the sodas in the fridge for tomorrow and get ready to face Bokuto again before going back to sleep, but he’s stopped. The lights are on in the apartment when he opens the door, someone’s rummaging around and someone’s yelling. He peeks his head inside, but he sees nobody. He steps inside, slips his shoes off, and walks around to the kitchen where the noises were coming from.

   
“Give it to me!”

   
“He’s dead! Give me the phone!”

   
Kuroo’s met with Tsukki and Bokuto tugging the house phone back and forth, the dial tone can be heard from it. Tsukki is just in his boxers and looks incredibly tired, Bokuto looks scared before his face lights up. Strong arms grab him and wrap under his shoulders and lift him up ever so slightly, and he hears the phone clatter to the tiled floor of his kitchen.

   
“Kuroo! You’re safe!” Bokuto laughs, sounding relieved, he hugs him tighter and lets out a yawn. Kuroo fights the blush and bewildered expression in his eyes at Bokuto hugging and pressing into him so tightly, and looks to an annoyed Tsukki.

   
“Wha-” Kuroo’s about to ask, but Tsukki beats him to it.

   
“Don’t leave the house in the middle of the night, asshole,” Tsukki doesn’t yell, but there’s warning in his tone and he punches Kuroo on the shoulder, harder than expected from such a lanky kid.

   
“Fine! Jeez…” Kuroo sighs, and by that point his feet are back on the ground, but Bokuto still has his hands and arms draped around him. Tsukki pushes past him, bumping their shoulders together as he walks by. He flops himself back down onto the couch with his face so stuffed into the cushions it looked like it would be hard to breathe. His arms and legs are up at odd angles, Kuroo always thought Tsukki looked like some skinny spider with spangly long legs, especially when he slept.

   
“Did you buy stuff?” Bokuto says, arms releasing around him tiredly in favour of lightly touching the plastic bag in Kuroo’s hand. Kuroo takes a moment to answer before he jumps a little, “oh! Oh, yeah I did.”

   
Bokuto gives a sleepy hum to answer and Kuroo puts the ice cream in the freezer before it completely melts. “Do you wanna go back to bed? I didn’t mean to wake you up or anything.”

   
“Hm? Oh, no, you didn’t!” he insisted, yawning to counter what he had just said. “I just kinda woke up and noticed you weren’t there and I thought someone kidnapped you or something. I wanted to call 911 but Tsukki wouldn’t let me.”

   
“Oh my god, Bokuto,” Kuroo chuckled, running his fingers through his hair. “I woke up craving ice cream and I just kinda needed to get out, you feel?”

   
“I guess so,” he shrugged, leaning his head on Kuroo’s shoulder. “Can we go back to bed though?”

   
Kuroo nodded. “Yeah, I need sleep too.”

   
A clearly exhausted Bokuto seemed pleased with that response, letting Kuroo help him back down the hallway and into bed. He pressed his nose into Kuroo’s neck as they laid down, his sleepy grin sending a warmth through Kuroo’s chest.

   
“I was..so worried about you…” Bokuto murmured, drifting off as he spoke. “I didn’t...want you to be...kidnapped…”

   
“Well, that's, good of you to say, morally” Kuroo sighed, tension driving itself up his spine in little bursts that are making his head hurt and his arms shake. Bokuto seems to be unaffected by anything, and proceeds to wiggle closer every time Kuroos slightly pulls away. Bo’s arms were now wrapped around his midsection, pulling him into a big hug. He was initially trying to avoid the feelings he got from Bokuto being so snuggled into him, but he gave up, as it was nearly 4 in the morning, and he was getting such a happy and warm glow now that he just wanted to bask it in, just for now. “I’m here now though, and I’m not kidnapped.”

   
“I’m...so glad…” Bo smiled one last time before falling asleep again.

   
Thinking back through the night made Kuroo feel almost guilty. Feeling so shitty and stressed out over a dream about someone he actually--as he was starting to realize--cares about seemed so stupid and extra. It may have been the middle of the night, and he may have been disoriented, but nonetheless, he still knew he couldn’t push away all of his feelings forever, because clearly his subconscious will come back and bite him in the ass. Or fuck it. Either way, it results in a lot more emotional turmoil than necessary.

  
Those were thoughts for the morning though. For now, Kuroo planted a small kiss on Bokuto’s head, pulled the covers over them both, and went back to sleep beside him.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hiiii thank u for continuing to put up with me and this gay fic ily all
> 
> school is about to kick my ass but I'm 100000% committed to finishing this by the end of November for NaNoWriMo. Thanks for reading!!
> 
> (My twitter: @owlfuker)  
> (My bf's twitter who's writing this with me: @kkozuken)


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> more alcohol

 

Once in their sophomore year of college, Tanaka had invited Kuroo out to a party in the dorms. He accepted, because that was his first year living off campus and he missed the good ol’ days of getting wasted three times a week with clusters of pimply strangers and getting shut down by RAs. He hadn’t been drinking as much lately due to that though, so when he completely miscalculated exactly how much he could (and should) drink, he ended the night projectile vomiting all over Tsukki’s legs and having to be driven home while he flopped around on the floor of the backseat. 

 

The hangover he felt the next day was somehow not nearly as bad as the emotional hangover he had after waking up, stomach aching from too much ice cream, and Bokuto sleeping beside him still.   
  


The first rational thought he had was to go shower. Cleanse himself from all the confusing hell of the night before. Letting scalding water beat against his back and saturate his hair was therapeutic for as long as it lasted, but he knew he couldn’t avoid any more shit. He promised himself in his last moments before falling asleep that he couldn’t keep shoving away the feelings any longer, or else they would definitely only get worse. Besides, it’s not like they were bad feelings - just stressful for him. He didn’t have the emotional capability to sustain a healthy relationship right now, and especially with his doubt that Bokuto even felt the same way. Some people are just looking for sex, and with the way Bokuto acted when they were out at the carnival that night, it was clear that’s all he really wanted from this. So, Kuroo saving himself the heartache of a rejection seemed like the best route.    
  


That definitely didn’t get rid of the crush though.   
  


He stepped out of the shower, spending only a minute trying to brush through and style his hair, but giving up because it never stays. Pulling a clean shirt over his head, he looked long and hard at himself.    
  


_You have to just relax, accept what you’re dealing with, and move the fuck on,_ he told himself mentally, over and over.   
  


He eventually concluded that he should probably talk to someone about everything, but that was still too far off for him to think too long about. So, he just shut off the light to the bathroom and headed into the kitchen to start making breakfast.

  
“You went to the grocery store at 3am last night and neglected to get anything of substance,” Tsukki chastised from the couch. “We have nothing for breakfast.”

  
Kuroo not-so-gently knocked his head into the wall out of distress, groaning so hard that he made his throat scratchy. “Fuck this. We have coffee right?”   
  


“No, you didn't get that either.”   
  


“Oh yeah. I forgot about that,” he groaned, substituting his beloved Folgers with tea and grabbing the biggest mug they had. He poured about seventy-five percent tea and twenty-five percent vodka. And also taking a swig from the bottle before putting it back in the liquor cabinet and taking a seat next to Tsukki.   
  


“Well good morning, sunshine,” he snickered after seeing Kuroo’s day drinking. “What happened last night that’s got you getting fucked up at 10am?”   
  


“I had a dream that was...unpleasant. I kinda woke up in a panic and had to leave.”   
  


“Like a nightmare kinda dream?”   
  


“Not really. More like,” he took a moment to figure out how to explain it without sounding like a little bitch. “Like, a dream that should be good but since my emotions are all fucked, it freaked me out.”   
  


“Damn,” Tsukki nodded his empathy. “That sucks.”   
  


“Yeah. It does. Which is why,” he held his mug up, “vodka exists.”   
  


“Amen.”

  
The two watched TV together in silence for the remainder of the morning between their brief moment of unity and Bokuto waking up.  
  


“What time is it?” he murmured, groggy and stumbling onto the couch beside Kuroo.   
  


“Almost 11,” he stated, patting Bokuto on the shoulder. “You needed the sleep.”   
  


“Do we have any food?”  


  
Kuroo smiled at the thought of Bo considering this apartment a ‘we’ thing. “Nah, I was gonna run out and get McDonald’s or something if you wanna come.”  
  


“Don’t drive, Kuroo, what the fuck,” Tsukki interjected, gesturing to his spiked drink.    
  


“Oh yeah, I forgot about that. Bokuto, if you drive, I’ll pay.”   
  


“Sure, sure,” he nodded, not bothering to ask why Kuroo couldn’t drive, thankfully. “Give me a minute to wake up though.”   
  


“There’s tea made if you want some.”

  
“I’m not a big tea guy,” he yawned, leaning his head against Kuroo’s shoulder, making his heart skip just a little. 

  
He let the silence rest over them in the time it took for Bokuto to adjust to being awake. For such an energetic guy, he sure did take some time to get to a point of functionality in the morning. Maybe that was why he was so high energy for the rest of the day.

 

Kuroo was right. The entire rest of their day starred a giddy Bokuto. The two of them went out for breakfast and spent the rest of the day watching more Rick and Morty until Bokuto decided he had to go and Kuroo figured he should work on his projects for school. It was a little hard to do that though, considering he had been spiking all of his drinks all day and had stabilized at a nice level of tipsy by the time Bokuto left. As soon as the door shut behind him, Kuroo immediately pulled out the remainder of the bottle of vodka and two shot glasses.

 

“Tsukki? You down? It’s sad if I just drink alone.”

  
“It’s sad if you drink alone but it’s even sadder when I drink with you because I hold my liquor and you don’t at all,” he chuckled, getting up anyway. “But, it’s been awhile. So I’ll take you up on that.”

  
Kuroo poured two shots, clinking his glass together with Tsukki’s before downing it without even a chaser. And then another. And another. And another. And another.

  
Kuroo’s clear end goal was to get shit-faced, and he succeeded. By the end of his series of shots, he could hardly stand up without stumbling over himself, and even Tsukki was lightening up. The two started searching through Netflix, trying to find the weirdest thing they could possibly watch. They both are very giggly drunks, which was actually how they wound up getting along at all in the first place, so eventually they turned on some terribly animated kid’s movie and watched it for about ten minutes before Kuroo decided to call Kenma too.

  
“Hello?” Kenma answered, clearly confused as to why he was being called on a Saturday night when Kuroo is off.

  
“Keeeenmaaaaaa,” he cooed, giving a snorting laugh with it. “Are you working?”

  
“No, are you drunk?”

  
“Yes, so come over.”  
  


“No.”

  
“Pleaaase. Tsukki’s here too.” Kuroo cupped his hand around his mouth and the phone speaker and stage whispered, “and I know you think he’s hot.”

  
“Christ, stop it,” Kenma groaned. “I don’t feel like getting wasted on your couch with your roommate.”

  
“But it’s so fuuun, and you never hang out with me anymore.” He wasn’t wrong. Kuroo and Kenma had been best friends since they were kids, but once Kenma got him his job, the two were usually too tired of seeing each other at work to wanna hang out even more outside of it. Kuroo let a moment of silence linger between the phone lines before adding, “please. It’ll be like a throwback to high school. I’ll even put on an old playlist.”

  
“Fine. Just give me a minute to change and I’ll head over.”

  
Kuroo grinned as wide as he could and gave a thumbs up to Tsukki. “Nice!!! See yaaaa.” And he hung up.

  
Kenma made his way over within the hour, and Kuroo’s greeting to him was a big bear hug and then handing him the remaining vodka in the bottle. “It’s not a _whole_  bunch, but you’re teeny tiny so you don’t need that much more.”  
  


“How endearing,” Kenma snickered, rolling his eyes before taking a sip.   
  


Kuroo tripped back over to the couch and leaned into Tsukki so there could be room for Kenma to sit with them. “What are you watching?” he asked, glancing at the TV for the first time.   
  


“Sky High, biiiiitch,” Kuroo cackled, putting his arm around Kenma. “I used to watch this shit when I was like, tiny and emo. I think Warren Peace was my sexual awakening, but looking back, he’s so ugly.”  
  
Kenma couldn’t help but laugh at him. “First of all, you have terrible taste if you ever thought he was hot, and second, oh my god, how much did you drink, Tetsurou?”  
  
“Too much, probably,” he shrugged. “I needed it though, don’t go being all... _judgy._ ”

  
“I won’t, but you should tell me why you needed it.”  
  
Kuroo pressed a finger against Kenma’s lips and shushed him. “It’s a secret. I’m just tryna watch my shitty Disney Channel original movie. Don’t get me emo.”  
  
“Fair enough,” Kenma concluded, taking another swig. He finished the bottle relatively quick, and it wasn’t long before all three of them were flopped over on each other, watching shitty old movies and laughing at just about anything.

  
The night was lighthearted and relaxed, all of them doing nothing but making senseless small talk and lying around. Kenma and Tsukki weren’t particularly known for being hardcore partiers, and Kuroo was drinking to cope with his emotional turmoil, so going out and doing something didn’t exactly seem up his alley for the time being. Kenma was always the first to fall asleep though, because if there’s anything to know about drunk Kenma, it’s that he gets exhausted after only an hour or two.

  
Once he knocked out, Kuroo figured he and Tsukki should just go chill in his room, because if they woke Kenma up, he would probably skin them alive. They continued their parade of mind-numbing television but with the added comfort of Kuroo’s fifteen-year-old mattress and blanket pile.

 

“Remember when we were in, like, sophomore year of high school, and you were always too pussy to sit within three feet of me because you didn’t want anyone to think you were gay?” Tsukki snickered, kicking at Kuroo’s legs under their shared blanket. “Just because I came out first and you were in denial.”

  
“Oh, fuck off, I just didn’t want rumors to start. I didn’t care when we hung out one on one.”

  
“That’s fair,” he shrugged, patting Kuroo’s shoulder. “Look at you now.”

 

They both burst out laughing, and as it faded out, there was a hazy lingering tension there. Tsukki and Kuroo’s relationship was a lot of them just being bitter and bickering and getting on each other’s nerves, but when it came down to it, they wouldn’t have ever lived together if there was no comradery. And it especially came out when they were drunk. Kuroo, in a moment of impulse, glanced over at Tsukki, grabbed him by the chin gently and leaned in to kiss him slowly, eyes closed. It took him until after he had forced his tongue into Tsukki’s mouth to realize he wasn’t kissing back. Kuroo pulled away to face a wide-eyed Tsukki, who sucked in a breath and blinked in shock before speaking.

  
“What in the _fuck_  was that?”

 

Kuroo opened his mouth to try to respond, but when nothing came out, Tsukki only continued. “Is this some kind of weird, repressed childhood thing? I don’t know if you thought me roasting 16 year old you for ‘no homo’-ing your way out of being friendly was like, an invitation for anything, but I assure you, it was _not_.”  
  


Tsukki continued his slurred, shitfaced rambling about how freaked out he was until Kuroo finally found the first words he could muster up. “I think I’m in love with Bokuto.”   
  


As if he weren’t baffled to begin with. “You what?”

  
“Okay, uh, maybe not, like, in love with, but I have a really gross debilitating miserable ugly giant crush on him. And I am in hell.”

  
Tsukki pressed his palms to his temples, rubbing them in circles and squeezing his eyes shut to temporarily sober up. “What does that have to do with the shit you just pulled here? Shouldn’t Bokuto be the one to have to bleach his mouth after receiving the kiss of death?”

  
“Hey, fuck you, I just,” Kuroo found himself struggling to articulate his thoughts and feelings again. “I just don’t know. I have literally been drinking since I woke up, and Bokuto slept over last night, and I had some messy fucking emotional crisis, and I haven’t let myself process through it at all because I really don’t want to, and I’m a really slutty drunk, and I don’t know how to feel about anything right now, so my obvious solution was to just somehow act on my drunken slutty urges, and I want you to be Bokuto right now, but you aren’t, and I am thoroughly confused, and I can’t remember anything I’m saying for longer than four seconds, and I am literally just spitting out every thought I have, so--”

 

“Sh, sh, sh,” Tsukki shook his head. “Stop talking. For like, a minute. Holy shit.”

 

The two sat in silence while they each tried to piece together their scattered thoughts. After a while Kuroo slipped his eyes shut and just let his head hang there, trying to think. The only thing each of them knew confidently was that they should definitely never do anything even remotely romantic or sexual in their lives, but the rest was a disaster. More so, for Kuroo.

  
“How about,” Tsukki began finally, clapping his hands together and pointing them at Kuroo, “we go to sleep, hopefully don’t remember anything from tonight, and if we do, we deal with this then. Because you have a whole mess of shit going on and I do not wanna deal with it at midnight after downing half a bottle of Smirnoff.”

  
“That sounds like a real good plan,” Kuroo nodded, giving him a thumbs up. “But your bitch ass has to get up and turn off the light.”

  
Tsukki groaned loudly in protest, but hauled himself up off the mattress to do it anyway. Kuroo rolled over, half of his body pressed against the wall, but he was growing too exhausted to care. All he wanted to do right then was ignore all of whatever just happened and pass out for twelve hours.

 

So, he did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in the words of rick and morty's Rick Sanchez, i hope ya'll are ready to get riggity riggity wrecked soon


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang plays cards against humanity, Tsukki gets a boner over love live!, angst ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *space jam theme voice* y'all ready for this ..?

Day two of Kuroo’s emotional hangover and he was oh so lucky enough to have an actual hangover alongside it. Rolling over, he found himself pressing his face into what he thought was Tsukki’s back, and was met with a raspy growl in response that Kuroo’s common sense knew better than to fuck with. He rocked back over to his other side once more.  
  


“Sorry I tried to make out with you,” he apologized into the void, eyes shut tight with his forearm pressed over his face.   
  


“What are you talking about?” Kenma’s muffled response sounded. Okay, so maybe he hadn’t exactly apologized to the void as much as to the person beside him who was definitely not Tsukki.  
  


“When did you get here?”  
  


“When Tsukki woke up and kicked me off the couch this morning,” he muttered, turning his head towards Kuroo and just barely opening his eyes. “Did you deadass make out with him?”  
  


“Christ, no,” Kuroo defended. “Or, uh, maybe? I don’t know. I’m still waking up. Let me die.”  
  


“Let me know when you figure it out,” Kenma groaned, pressing his face back into the pillow.  
  


_Please, god, Tsukki, tell me you made coffee_ , Kuroo thought in distress, trying to muster the willpower to haul himself out of bed so he could go pee.  
  


It took about eight minutes, but he eventually did, but as he worked his way into the kitchen, he learned that Tsukki had not made coffee, he went out and got good Starbucks shit without him. And then Kuroo remembered for the third time that they've been out of coffee for days now.  
  


“Tsukishima Kei, I hope you fucking die,” Kuroo hissed, slamming his head against the cupboards in rage. “You could've at least brought some for me and Kenma.”  
  


“You’re the one who never went shopping for more of literally anything,” Tsukki retorted. “It’s your own goddamn fault there’s no coffee left. Plus I deserve it after that shit you pulled last night.”  
  


Kuroo wanted to argue back with every fiber of his being, but he knew it was useless. It was his fault for not going shopping like he needed to, and Tsukki did kinda deserve it after Kuroo’s weird emotional projection onto him. Giving up, he trudged back into his room, digging in his closet for a hoodie so he could run out and get caffeinated so he doesn’t literally die.  
  


“Kenma, what do you want from McDonald’s?” he sighed, pulling shoes on and slipping his wallet into his pocket.  
  


He half-heartedly lifted his head up from the pillow and turned to look at Kuroo. “Why McDonald’s? Do we not have standards anymore?”  
  


“When you have no money and no groceries, you also have no standards. Egg McMuffin?”  
  


“And an iced coffee please. Lots of sugar.”  
  


“Got it. You owe me.”  
  


Kenma flopped his face back into the pillow as a response. Kuroo rolled his eyes and headed to the door, but was stopped by Tsukki calling out to him.  
  


“By the way, I ate the rest of your ice cream, dickhead,” he smirked, like he was playing some spiteful little game.  
  


“Jokes on you, fuckboy,” Kuroo snickered back. “I ate most of that ice cream with my sweaty, dirty hands.”  
  


He didn’t wait around for a response. He took off to the nearest McDonald’s, getting breakfast for two, and trying to emotionally prepare for the fact that, yeah, he did remember the night before, and yeah, he was probably gonna have to talk about it when he got back. But, I mean, at least he had a bagel to console him through the tough times. That’s what he was able to tell himself to resist the urge to crash his car before dealing with confrontation. Besides, he wouldn’t talk to Tsukki about anything until after Kenma left, so he at least had some time to sort his shit out.  
  


Upon re-entering his room with food, Kuroo found Kenma actually sitting upright and being semi-human for a moment. He made his way over, tossing the bag with a greasy yellow M on the side between the two of them as Kuroo took his seat. Kenma sipped graciously on his coffee and thanked Kuroo with a mouthful of Egg McMuffin.   
  


It only took a few minutes of silent chewing and swallowing before Kenma addressed the elephant in the room. “Did you...earlier, did you say you made out with Tsukki?”

  
Kuroo pinched the bridge of his nose. He had forgotten that Kenma knew. “Uh, I tried to. I was really drunk though and I have a lot of fuckin’ turmoil going on sexuality-wise.”  
  


“Anything you wanna talk about?”  
  


“I’d really rather not.”  
  


“That’s fair,” Kenma shrugged, continuing to eat his McMuffin but not ceasing to speak with mouthfuls of bread and egg. “You can do much better than Tsukki though.”  
  


“Are you just saying that because you want him to yourself?”  
  


“Fuck off.”  
  


“Fine, I guess I’ll just interpret your ambiguous answer however I want,” he teased while Kenma rolled his eyes. The two continued to make mindless chatter, eating and complaining about their headaches, until Kenma eventually had to head back to his place to work on homework and shower so he didn’t have grimy, day after musk anymore. Which was a blessing for Kuroo’s nose, but not any other part of him, because once Kenma was gone, he slowly and extremely tentatively turned and sat beside Tsukki on the couch.

  
“Yes?” he asked, raising an eyebrow after Kuroo had been sitting there in silence for a little bit too long.  
  


“I didn’t mean to be gross last night. I’m just having a lot of really fucking weird emotions right now.”

  
“For fuck’s sake, Tetsurou, it’s like you’ve never had a crush before.” Tsukki paused what he was doing to look directly at Kuroo. “Get your shit together. You are a grown ass man acting like a bumbling school girl over the most oblivious guy in existence. Put on your goddamn big boy pants, and either tell him, or get over it. What’s the worst possible thing that could happen?”

  
“He could say he doesn’t like me.”

  
“Oh, and god fucking forbid that,” he barked sarcastically. “That’s not the end of the world, you can still be friends even if he doesn’t want you to get his dick wet. Why has he gotten into your head like this?”

“I don't  _know_ , that’s why I’m having this _crisis_ ,” Kuroo spat bitterly, accentuating the words 'know' and 'crisis' by bringing a hand down to slap harshly at the tops of his knees. “You clearly aren’t any help, I shouldn’t have dragged you into this. My feelings are growing to be a lot stronger than just a schoolgirl crush, so if you’re gonna tell me to just man up and get over it, I’d rather not go to you for advice, thank you very much.”  
  


“Well, here’s a thought then: instead of just having this non-stop pity party for yourself and your oh-so-confusing feelings, why don’t you take a minute, sober up, figure out exactly what you’re feeling, and then talk to Bokuto? That’s a better idea than day drinking and then trying to fuck your roommate.”  
  


Kuroo fumed for a minute, wishing he could be pissed at Tsukki for being such a blunt asshole, but he knew he was right. “Fuck you and your wise tough love. It’s annoying that I can’t be mad when you’re right.”  
  


“I know, and that’s why I still stand as your voice of reason through all of your bullshit,” he smirked. “Now, can I get back to what I was watching, or do you need anything else?”  
  


“I’m good,” Kuroo nodded, standing up again. “I think I’m just gonna shower and then have some soul-searchy art time.”  
  


“Have fun,” Tsukki said finally, waving him off and pressing play on the TV again.  
  


As Kuroo stood in the shower, head still a bit cloudy from the booze, he mulled over the points Tsukki had made. What _was_  getting Kuroo so worked up over this? He’s aware that he’s gay, and it’s not like he hasn’t gotten rejected from someone he likes in the past, so what made this so different? He figured it must be that it’s not just a crush, it’s someone he’s growing really close to as a friend. They talk all the time, Bokuto visits him at work, they hang out relatively often, and all of that could be made more tense than it already is if he were to accidentally pull shit like he did last night and blurt out his feelings. Or maybe it was the reversion to middle school aged feelings about it: being excessively nervous about it, getting easily distracted by him, and especially the dream he had? Bokuto’s excitable, child-like nature made this all the more difficult, because it was giving Kuroo these fluttery feelings that were so sugar sweet that they could rot your teeth out in a heartbeat. He was essentially Benjamin Button-ing in the relationship department, and by the end of his shower, he finally recognized that as the source of his distress.  
  


So, the only real solution he had to move forward was to keep on being around Bokuto, as friends, until his feelings started to stabilize and give him confirmation that this is real, adult attraction rather than some nagging schoolyard infatuation.

 

* * *

 

        Several more weeks of routinely balancing work, school, and his nonstop texts to Bokuto, and Kuroo finally found the spare time to have Bokuto and Kenma over. Though, Bokuto was a bit more willingly.

 

“You can’t get your wallet back until you play cards with us,” Kuroo teased, refusing to let Kenma’s glare faze him. Kuroo had snagged his wallet while at work that day, and was now presenting Kenma with the ultimatum of either play Cards Against Humanity with him and Bokuto, or be broke and dangerously driving with no license until he did.  
  


“You are fucking scum, you know that?” he growled, pushing his fingers through his hair.  
  


“Yes. Now, come get drunk with us.” Because where’s the fun in Cards Against Humanity without a little liquor? That, and Kuroo had held off on drinking since that night with Kenma and Tsukki. He wasn’t about to make the same mistake of trying to kiss someone again, unless it actually was Bokuto.

  
Kenma rolled his eyes, but did reluctantly take a seat on the couch beside Tsukki. Bokuto and Kuroo rested side by side on the ground facing them, cards set up in the middle.

  
“How do we decide who goes first?” Bokuto asked, shuffling around his cards in his hands.

  
“Whoever provided the most liquor gets to go first,” Kuroo replied. “Meaning sapiosexual over there.” 

  
Tsukki’s nose scrunched up and eyebrows drew together in a disgusted look that Kuroo took lots of joy in making fun of. He gave a playful smirk back.  
  


“Absolutely not, I’m watching something.” 

  
“Fine, fine,” Kuroo allowed. “Go then,” he nods to Bokuto.

 

The rule was that whoever won each round got to take a shot, while anyone who didn’t had to continue sipping at their beer. Bokuto had brought the game, and he had a couple cards that he had made himself, filled with random inside jokes he had going with his friends. Some of them made no sense, but that’s where it actually wound up being more fun. By the end of the first game, which went by rather quickly, Kuroo had won, so he was the most tipsy out of everyone. It also was him that proposed a second game, which is where shit really began to hit the fan. One win into the game made by Bokuto with the “Altar Boys” card, Kuroo flops onto his back while it’s his turn and proceeds to claw his hands up Tsukki’s calf.

 

“What the fuck,” Tsukki all but spits out at Kuroo, halfheartedly trying to wiggle his leg free while also trying to continue to watch his video. He gives up and pauses it, but keeps his earbuds in.

  
“Play with us, it’s more fun with more people,” Kuroo mumbles.

  
“I bet,” Tsukki says, taking out one of his earbuds.

  
“Please Tsukki, I’ll go buy you some more ice cream.”

  
Tsukki ponders that idea for a moment, before kicking Kuroo off with a little more force this time and standing up. He sits down next to Kenma and crosses his legs.

  
“Sure, but you’re also gonna clean the bathroom again,” Tsukki says, smiling. Kuroo waves his hand and agrees, and they all get into it and play.

  
It’s been only about an hour and a bit but Tsukki and Kenma are already a little tipsy. Bokuto, through slurs and giggles, ordered some pizza and breadsticks. Kenma, as Kuroo knows, is a silent but deadly player; he’s hard to make laugh when he’s the czar, and he is leading with 8 points. Bokuto is second, with 6 points, Kuroo third with 5, and lastly is Tsukki with 2 points, that he is visibly very bitter about.

  
Kuroo’s the czar for this round, and the black card played is “Trust me, I’m ___.” He places it down and watches the faces of the bunch snicker to themselves as they flip through their options, trying to find the funniest or the one that will make Kuroo laugh the most. They place their cards down. When Tsukki puts his down a bubbly drunken laugh makes it’s way out of him, and he leans forward, his own head near his crossed legs as he giggles. Glasses askew and a little blush on his cheeks, his laughter almost sounds manic.

  
“Look at mine, Kuroo,” he manages to get out. Kuroo looks down, smiling too as when Tsukki gets like this it’s when Kuroo remembers why they’re roomies in the first place. Tsukki’s card reads ‘a box.’ Just….’a box.’ 

  
Kuroo chuckles a little but Tsukki is losing his fucking mind, tears threatening to spill down his cheeks as his laughter is probably starting to hurt him low in his stomach. 

  
“A box! Just…. _ oh fuck _ , just a box!” 

  
Kenma snickers a little, and then he’s laughing a little bit at Tsukki too. 

  
“It’s so mundane,” Kenma comments, and his laughter grows until Tsukki eventually wipes the tears from his eyes and slurs a “go on”.

  
Kuroo forgot to look through the cards while Tsukki was having an episode, so he gets back to it. Kenma’s card is “completely naked and covered in indian friendship bracelets,” and Kuroo loses his shit when he sees Bokuto's play, which is “slowly, sensually fucking a pancake.” 

  
He surges forward and little and let’s out a very ugly gut busting laugh. “Trust me, dude,” he says in between giggles, “I’m slowly and sensually fucking a pancake.”

  
Bokuto laughs then too, covering his mouth with his hands as he watches Kuroo react. 

  
“Like! You have to confirm it to the person!” Kuroo keeps making himself laugh harder every time he speaks, so he decides in his hazy mind to stop babbling and give Bokuto the win. 

  
“Fuck, okay though Kuroo, like….” Bokuto says, looking towards Kuroo and leaning in a little, whispering loudly. “Does that card like…? It’s weird, I’m getting major deja vu when I look at it and I don’t know why…” 

  
Kuroo looks up to the ceiling, mouth open in thought, trying to rummage through his memories to help Bo out a little.

  
“No, no I don’t remember anything but like, I think I’m getting deja vu too… what the hell..” 

  
Kuroo searches his mind more,and they ponder together for a moment while Kenma taps impatiently on his knee, Tsukki taking a swig of his vodka. 

  
“Do we have some kind of connection with like,” Bokuto stutters from the alcohol induced hiccup, “p-pancakes…?” 

  
Kuroo’s head is swimming too hard to comprehend anything around him, and he knows he’s not going to be able to help Bo get anywhere with this. The two share a confused look, before Kuroo grunts out a “huh, that’s weird.”

  
Just then, there’s a knock on the door, and Bokuto is quick to jump up and wobble around trying to get his footwork steady before he dances - literally dances, in long strides and waving arms - towards the door. 

  
An orange mess of hair is standing at the door, in a little black uniform with a work hat that doesn’t do much to keep the orange curls tamed. He’s bubbly when he hands over the pizza with the breadsticks and drinks on top and says, “Here’s your pizza!”

  
Kuroo stood up too so he could wobble towards the door, leaning a hand on the wall as he smiled at the kid and reached into his pocket for his wallet. He realizes it’s not there and pats around, turns and starts to frantically check his apartment while Tsukki and Bokuto laugh at him. In the time it took Kuroo to locate his wallet, Kenma had slipped over to the door and started hitting on the pizza boy, who had begun blushing furiously at the encounter. Drunk Kenma gets very blunt and very slutty, so Kuroo shooed him away only after Kenma scribbled his number on the pizza boy’s arm. Kuroo did find his wallet and gave the kid the money, and afterwards, stumbled around and kicked the door closed with his foot.

 

The rest of the night is spent in a haze of childish grins, ugly snorts, and dumb jokes that makes the alcohol in all of their systems bubble up into laughter. Kuroo feels warmth in his stomach that blooms into his chest, and when a hand inches its way onto Kuroo’s, fingers snaking in between his own, he doesn’t feel off. He feels light, lighter than air, and he giggles and presses his bedhead hair into Bokuto’s shoulder. He hears a little gasp and Bo’s hand is squeezing Kuroo’s hand, reassuring, and Kuroo thinks he could just fall asleep right there. Instead his hands seem to move on their own, and his other arm swings around to wrap loosely around Bokuto’s waist, moving his body so he’s basically lying on the floor with his head muffled into Bokuto's thigh. They stay like this for a while, as their game has died down and they’re all laughing and telling stories. Kuroo notices Kenma picking the mushrooms off of his pizza slice, and then handing it to Tsukki, who Kuroo knew loathed mushrooms. Kuroo slurs, filter completely gone. 

  
“You’re fucking, gay, Ken-maaaaa, you’re gayyyy,” he giggles, and then Bokuto does too. Kuroo’s lying down in his lap, head facing up in Bokuto’s crossed legs as Bokuto threads his fingers through Kuroo’s hair as he looks down at him with half lidded, glazed over eyes. Kuroo ignores it to make fun of Kenma for being a homosexual. Kenma’s lips turn up in a playful smile.

  
“Says you. You’re gay too, look,” he says, lazily lifting his arm up to point at Kuroo’s head that was in Bokuto’s lap.  
  


They all laugh for a while before Kenma gets up and states he’s going to go to the washroom.  
  


“Tsukishitt-ma...ahaha…” Kuroo slurs, very much drunk at this point. Tsukki snorts a little at the dumb name that he wouldn’t have laughed at if he was sober. They giggle and drink until Kuroo gets up to check on Kenma, partly because Kuroo could be an annoying drunk, and partly because Kenma had been gone for almost twenty minutes. He knocks on the door a little harder than he initially thought he was going to.  
  


“Kenmaaa?” he groans. There’s silence, and Kuroo presses his ear to the door.  
  


“Are you dying..?” he says, laughing a little at the question. He hears a light jingle, tapping fingers, high pitched singing, and Kuroo pounds on that door.  
  


“Are you playing Love Live! in my bathroom again!?” he whines.   
  


“No!” Kenma finally answers him, but Kenmas favourite girl (who Kuroo hears about almost endlessly), Rin, yells out something during the song and Kuroo groans yet again.  
  


“I did not give you booze for this! Come back out!”   
  


Thankfully, a drunk Kenma is not a confrontational one, and he soon gets out of the bathroom.  
  


Sitting back down together, Kuroo waves to Tsukki who is staring off. “Have you ever seen Kenma play his stupid anime idol game?”   
  


“It’s not stupid..” Kenma mutters, not looking away from his phone as he messes with his settings. Tsukki shakes his head.  
  


“Play a Master song, Kenma, it’s fucking lit.”  
  


Kenma does, rearranges his team first and then picks out a song to play. He cracks his knuckles, neck, then thumbs, as Tsukki leans over him a little. It only takes about a minute or so, but Kenma almost full combo’s the song, and sighs down at his hands when he’s done.  
  


“Usually I can full combo this, but…” Kenma says, and turns his head to look up at Tsukki, who is staring at him with half lidded eyes, mouth slightly open, lips shiny and staring at Kenma’s. “But… I’m..drunk…” he finishes, eyes flickering down to Tsukki’s lips.  
  


Before Kuroo knows it, the two are making out on their apartment floor, Kenma pulling himself into Tsukki’s lap and Tsukki looking like he’s struggling to keep up. Kuroo laughed a little to ignore how grossed out he was that two of his best friends were dry humping in his living room, and looked to Bokuto with a drunken hope he’d be able to find a similar seat. He finds him sleeping on the floor with the rim of an empty beer bottle still in his mouth. Kuroo smiles, and doesn’t think much of it when he crawls beside Bokuto and snuggles in close on their carpet floor, setting the beer to the side. Kuroo only, _finally_ , falls asleep when Tsukki and Kenma fall to the ground with a thud, and a “how about we…. just lie down…” from Kenma, before they both also grew silent with drowsiness, and soon, sleep.   
  


* * *

 

         
        The morning after, everyone awoke in a groggy pile of disorient in the middle of Kuroo and Tsukki’s living room floor. Kuroo refused to open his eyes for the first few minutes of being awake, especially since he was the last one to wake up. He assumed it was Bokuto in the bathroom, because he could hear Kenma and Tsukki murmuring to one another on the other side of him. It wasn’t until Bokuto came back and laid back down beside him that he even so much as moved in a way that indicated he was awake. He, being his totally suave self, rolled over and pressed himself against Bo in a way that made him still seem asleep. 

 

“Aw, look at that little fucker,” he overheard Tsukki snicker. “I think he loves you, Bokuto.” Kuroo seized up with anxiety at hearing that because Tsukki was the only one who actually knew he _did_  love Bokuto.  
  


Thankfully, he said nothing more and all Bo gave as a response was a chuckle and a big bear hug to a “sleeping” Kuroo. 

  
Eventually though, Kuroo did officially get up, and the four of them shuffled around, cleaning up cards and paper plates and greasy napkins. Once the apartment had been picked up enough, Kenma and Tsukki dipped out, refusing to answer when asked where they were going.

  
“10 billion dollars says they’re going to bone,” Kuroo snorted after the door closed.

  
“Are they dating? Why would they be fucking?” Bokuto asked curiously, before Kuroo realized that Bo had fallen asleep before their little makeout session.  
  


He explained what happened as Bokuto let out hysterical laughter at the thought of seeing it. The two kept on with their reminiscing of the night before, each one filling in the other’s holes of hazy, liquor-filtered memories. It turned into yet another peaceful day; doing nothing with Bokuto was so much nicer than doing nothing when alone. He didn’t leave until some time after Tsukki returned, messy haired and without Kenma. Kuroo and Bokuto snickered about it to themselves for the last minutes until he finally departed.  
  


* * *

 

      The following days were quiet and simple, Kuroo going through his same cycle of school and work and sleep. Eventually, one evening began as just another uneventful Wednesday night at the dart stand, and Bokuto was sitting cross-legged, trying to toss darts--even though he knew the balloons wouldn’t pop--and making small talk with Kuroo. “What are you doing this weekend?”

 

“I’m actually heading out to visit my mom for the weekend,” he smiled. It had been a couple months since he went to visit home; he had been getting too caught up in school and work and Bokuto. “I leave Friday morning.”

  
“Really? You never tell me about your family,” Bo commented, hopping over the counter and picking up all of the darts that had bounced to the ground.

  
“Well, I have a sister, Kita, who’s two years older than me. She’s married and lives out in Europe because she’s all artsy and poetic and shit, which is where I learned all my artsy shit,” Kuroo explained. “And I have a younger brother, Fumio, who’s a freshman in college; he’s studying to be a nurse in Boston in the States because apparently at least one of us needed a stable career. And then I have my mom, who is the absolute best woman to ever exist on this hellscape. I don’t know how she does it, she’s so fuckin’ sweet and wise and shit. I like to visit whenever I can because I’m only a couple hours away, as opposed to my siblings who are scattered throughout the globe. But my only issue is that she’s definitely a prier and it can get irritating to be with her for extended periods of time.”

 

“What do you mean?”

  
“Like, she pries into my personal life.” Kuroo sighed and hopped up with Bokuto to sit beside him, their legs dangling over the edge of the stand together. “I’m gonna get there and she’s gonna have her hugs and kisses and hellos, but then it’s gonna be a bombardment of,” he puffed up his chest and did his best impression of his mom, “‘How’s school going? You’re eating enough right? Tell me about work, oh what do you mean there’s nothing to tell, think of something! Show me your art, you’re so private! Don’t you want your poor old mother to appreciate her son’s work before she _dies_?" But she’s only like 50 so it makes no sense.”

  
“She cares about you, is that so bad?” Bokuto laughed.

  
“No, but it’s just that nonstop for three days. And if she gets on the subject of boys, she _never_  stops.”

  
Bo cocked his head. “What do you mean by boys?”

  
“Like, her asking me if I have a boyfriend, and when I say no, she proceeds to list every single gay or gay-seeming or straight-but-maybe-I-can-work-my-magic-and-convert-him guy that she can think of. She’s been trying to get me laid for years, it’s weird.”

  
“Your mom knows you’re gay?”

  
“Uh, yeah? Your mom doesn’t?”

  
He shook his head, starting to fiddle with his thumbs. “We’re not really all that personal, my parents and I. It’s all a lot of surface level stuff. Like, growing up, we only really talked at dinner if they were home, and even then it was just ‘how are you? Your grades okay?’ and then they’d go on about whatever else was going on in their lives.”

  
“Aw shit, man, and I’m over here complaining that my mom wants to know more about me,” Kuroo sighed, putting his hand on Bokuto’s shoulder. “I’m sure they’re just busy though. If you tried coming out, they’d be so proud of you.”

  
Bokuto smiled softly. “You think so?”

  
“Well, hell yeah! I mean, you’re fuckin’ cool, so the people that raised you are cool too.”

  
“So I should come out? When’s a good time to do it?”

  
“That’s up to you I guess. You can’t really pick a perfect time because that doesn’t exist, so my advice is just do it whenever you’re ready.”  
  


Bokuto nodded, staring off in thought for a moment before looking back at Kuroo. “I wanna do it now.”  
  


“Right now? Like, tonight?”  
  


“Yeah! My parents are actually both here tonight, and I don’t know when the next time they will be after this. Plus like, YOLO, y’know?”  
  


“That’s true,” Kuroo shrugged. Bokuto looked confident in his choice, even excited. “I can go with you if you want. I get off at 8.”  
  


He lit up. “Would you really? That’d be so great!”  
  


“I’m totally down. All the moral support you can get is good, right?”  
  


Bokuto nearly tackled Kuroo with a hug. “Right! Thank you!” He let go of a now blushing Kuroo and hopped down back to the outside of the stand, grinning with excitement. The two continued on with simple chatter after that, trying to fill up the hour and a half before they could leave. Once they finally did, they each grabbed sodas from another stand and then headed out to Kuroo’s car.  
  


“I can take you back to get your car afterwards,” he noted as Bokuto jumped into the passenger seat. “It won’t get towed or anything, I told Kenma.”  
  


“Awesome!” Bokuto was practically bouncing, and although he was clearly eager, Kuroo also could sense a bit of anxiety that bloomed underneath. The closer they got to his neighborhood, the more that showed through. Kuroo figured it would be best to offer his own experience.  
  


“Hey, uh, do you wanna hear about how I came out to my mom?”  
  


Bokuto nodded, beginning to chew on his lower lip and stare expectantly at Kuroo, who continued after gaining approval.  
  


“Well, I wasn’t the kind of kid who everyone, like, knew was gay. You know how some people are like that? Like, Kenma, for example, didn’t shock anyone when he came out. And Tsukki did a little, but he was twice as nerdy as a 14 year old, so it’s not like it was super out of nowhere. But with me, I was always a bro type. I played sports, y’know, volleyball and I did track for a little while. And I was super super hyper-conscious of the fact that my two closest friends were gay. A lot of times, I didn’t even wanna be seen too close to them anywhere or stuff like that, I had that whole hyper masculinity complex going.”  
  


He glanced back over at Bokuto to make sure he was still involved before he continued. “So, when I realized like, oh shit, I might like guys, I was a fucking mess. I was almost seventeen, I had a girlfriend--yeah, that was rough--and I was basically having an existential crisis over this. And my mom could obviously see it. Kita had gone off to college and so my mom was like, nervously attaching herself to me and Fumio, so anytime one of us was acting off, she got even more nervous. So, a few days into my self-doubting breakdown, my mom comes into my room and finds me flipping shit, like I’m super shaky and I keep trying to draw but nothing is coming out right so I was crumbling up papers and throwing shit. She sits me down and asks me what’s wrong and I, being an angsty teenager, refused to tell her. She’s not stupid though, she knew something was wrong, but _because_  she’s not stupid, she also knew that I just needed time alone. 

  
“A couple hours pass, I skip dinner and I just kinda hole up in my room that night, starting to feel more shitty about making my mom all worried. So, after I hear my brother go to bed, I swallow my pride, and I go knock on her door and I just start crying. Like, ugly ugly crying. So, she does that motherly thing where she lets me lean on her shoulder and cry and she’s rubbing my back, and once I finally calm down enough to speak, I just blurt out that I’m gay.”

  
Bokuto’s brows had slowly grown more and more concerned as he got more invested in the story. “What did she do after that?”

  
“She smiled. She would’ve laughed, but she knew that would upset me. She was so relieved that it wasn’t something more serious that was wrong, and she just looked at me and told me that it makes no difference to her, as long as I’m happy. And then I cried more.” Kuroo laughed at the memory.

  
“That’s so sweet,” Bokuto smiled, seeming just a little less nervous now. By then, they were pulling up to his driveway.

  
“Yeah, it was sweet for about a minute and then she laughed and told me that she should’ve known I was gay because of how fucking dramatic I was being,” Kuroo snorted. “She was just teasing, obviously, but it was helpful. Made it all feel more normal. And then she started harassing me about dating boys, and what was once comforting, grew to be very annoying in years to come.”

  
“That’s still sweet though,” Bo insisted. “And at least when I come out, I don’t have to deal with breaking up with a girl afterward; what did you do?”

  
“I was honest with her. I mean, I kept dating her like a month after that because I was hella fucking nervous about coming out to everyone and having to dump her, but it wasn’t the most serious of relationships, so she didn’t take it to heart or anything.”

  
“That’s good then. Sounds like pretty smooth sailing.”

  
“It was. There was the occasional homophobic asshole, but the only people who were consistently dickish were Kenma and Tsukki, and they just heckled me because of the whole hyper masculine, in denial straight boy trope that I carried out for so long. They eventually stopped teasing after a couple months. I'm still a bro though and they're not gonna be able to change that.”  
  


“That’s still really good though,” Bokuto grinned before looking at the house in front of him. “I think we should go in now.”  
  


“You’re right,” Kuroo agreed, reaching down and patting his hand that was resting between the two seats. “You’ll be okay.”

 

Bokuto gained a new resolve, and practically leaped out from the car, too excited to close the door behind him. Kuroo gets up and out of the car to watch him run up the front entrance, the porch, and then into his house. He closes the car door that Bo had left open and leans on it, arms crossed with a leg relaxed. He takes in a breath, closes his eyes, and breathes it back out.   
  


He felt almost like he shouldn’t be in this position right now, outside of Bokuto’s family home waiting for him to finish coming out to his parents. It almost felt as if this was the wrong moment. Like, Kuroo had worked to get Bokuto to like him in the beginning, but the end result was unsatisfied and they were actually destined to meet for this moment right now. That after this the end of any tension will be gone, Bokuto would move on if he hadn’t already, and most importantly… Kuroo would move on. The thought scared him. Maybe the best idea was to move on from him, but a bigger part of Kuroo--what he wanted more--was to get it all to work. It clouded his one track mind, the road curved and confusing when Kuroo could usually only make himself deal with things if they were simple.   
  


He’s in the middle of thought when he hears something loud, and looks up. He scans around before he hears a thundering sound coming from near the house. Kuroo cautiously walks up the curving walkway to the door, checking in the bushes with only his eyes as he does. A squirrel leaps out and rushes away, and he smiles and lets the tiny bit of anxiety forming at the bottom of his spine to alleviate itself. He sighs to calm his nerves, leaning his back against a small tree near the walkway. He’s practically shocked back up onto his feet when another ear-splitting scream comes billowing out from above him, and Kuroo hears continued yelling. He swallows, runs his hands through the back of his hair and pulls them through his scalp as he sucks in his bottom lip and chews, realization that Bokuto’s parents aren’t taking this super well was dawning on him. The crash of something glass makes Kuroo unable to think as he runs up the steps, mind blank besides the idea that Bokuto was in danger and he needed to get up there as soon as possible. 

  
The house is lit up in pretty oranges from soft lighting and candles, flames causing light to dance on the walls and the golden framed painting of a landscape. Kuroo hears more yelling and he turns, bolting up the dark wooden staircase so fast he thinks he may slip and fall.

  
He runs down the hall, feet jumpy as he checks each door that’s open already and twists the doorknob of every one that’s closed.

  
He almost runs past when he hears the yelling grow louder from another, smaller hallway, and he runs down that one as well, before turning into the first room and almost being blinded by silence and the feeling of eyes all over him. 

He doubles over for just a second, not realizing how fast and how far he’d been sprinting, catches his breath before standing up and leaning his forearm on the wall beside him. He swallows. 

 

“Hey,” is all he can muster. 

 

It’s silent for not even a minute, only seconds, but every moment passes by like he’s counting down days on a calendar. The room looks like Bokuto’s parents bedroom, so large he could hold a party just in there. A huge king sized bed with a chandelier and bookshelves, a fireplace and pretty high glossed hardwood flooring. Bokuto’s mother wasn’t a particularly small woman, tall and a little chubby with a very mom-like brown bob. She had a mole under her lip and soft freckles on pale skin, but hard brown eyes that looked smoldering at the moment. When Kuroo looks towards Bokuto’s father, he can tell where Bokuto’s genes come from that make up his build. His dad was bigger than both him and Bo, 6”3, maybe even 6”4. Big with toned arms, but age had visibly gotten to his physique, part of his size in the fat that stuck to his frame. There was no doubt this guy was strong though, big and angry was an understatement. Light golden eyes like Bokuto and jet black hair shaved down but had visibly grown out a little, streaked with pale grays from age. Kuroo looked at him and felt like a twig, just looking at him made him feel inferior and small, and to add onto it all he was _fumi_ _ng_ , red blotchy on his sweaty olive skin. 

 

The silence finally stops, but is only broken with a voice that nothing but shatters the boy beside him. 

  
“Is this your fucking boyfriend?” His voice is low, hot and angry like the words are burning over a blue fire. His mom just stares at Kuroo as he straightens his back.

  
“No,” he hears his voice crack, “I’m just a friend, I drove him here.”

  
“I can’t fucking believe this, what about that girl you dated forever ago?” his mom steps forward just a little. Bokuto slicks his hair back with his hand, eyes focused on the ground.

  
“It was real...just, I mean…. guys mean alot to me too, it’s not-”

  
“Stop it, I didn’t,” his dad stops, steps forwards, steps back, and Bokuto shoots straight up. “I didn’t raise you to be like this!” he all but yells. 

  
“What about my grand kids!?” His mom’s eyes widen and mouth falls open, she had just realized this. 

  
“I can… there’s always, adoption,” Bokuto’s voice is just above a whisper, and Kuroo had never heard it that softly before, even when he was about to drift off to sleep.

  
“They aren’t the same! They won’t be yours! They won’t be _mine_!” she stomps her foot.

  
“Mom...listen..” Bokuto says, voice wavering.   
  
“No, I’m not listening to this bullshit anymore,” his dad waves his hand, as if swatting a fly.   
  
“You think you can just come in here and tell us you want to be a faggot? Like everything we’ve done for you has been for nothing?” He booms, and Bokuto tenses at the word, shakes his head.   
  
“No? No what?” his mom stutters in, but doesn’t give Bokuto enough time to answer.

  
“And you’re going to bring someone else here to rub it into our faces too!? Are you fucking kidding me?” Bokuto’s dad lets out a disbelieved stream of laughter.

  
  
Kuroo watches, dumbfounded, as all of this unravels in front of him. He doesn’t feel like this is real, like it’s a movie and the credits are going to play any moment. Like every coming out PSA he’d ever seen. Then, something happens that Kuroo thinks he’ll never be able to get out of his mind, etched into his memories for the rest of his life.

Bokuto starts to cry.    
  


  
It starts with shallow hiccuping, hands shaking to reach for his face as tears come quick down his cheeks that he swipes up quickly with the bottoms of his palms. His legs and arms start shaking as his cheeks and neck bloom red, eyes going puffy as he starts to sob. Shoulder tensed, he gives in and snaps away from his parents disapproving gaze to smother his face into his hands, open his mouth, and give out a throaty, sad garble of heavy cries. They’re heartbreaking, such a sweet, happy person unraveling into pieces Kuroo never wanted to ever see before. An arm grabs Bokuto’s and yanks him roughly nearer to the source of his sadness, and Kuroo bolts forward. Adrenaline pumping through him, everything goes by in a blur, and all he can register is the stinging all around ache now blooming into his cheekbone and jaw, already growing sore and pin prickly pain searing through.   
  


“Fuck!” he hears, but realizes it was him, and feels himself thump to the ground. Through the commotion Bokuto squirms free and runs from the room.   
  


Kuroo looks up, one eye temporarily blinded with his body flooding it with hot tears, he stares up at the man.    
  


“Get out of my house,” he says, clear, low, demanding. Kuroo gets up, using the wall behind him for leverage while he holds his cheek with the other hand. “Tell him he’s not allowed to step foot back in here,” he says while his wife flees to a bathroom connected to the bedroom. Kuroo nods, can’t think of anything else but to go find Bokuto, help him, console him.

  
He spits out a “fuck you,” because that’s all he can think of in the moment, and slams the door as he runs down the steps.

  
He quickly checks around the house, and finds Bokuto in his room, on his bed with his legs crossed, a big stuffed owl being cradled in his lap. He’s still sobbing, cries filling the room in the saddest sound Kuroo had ever heard. He stops, goes to reach his hand out, stops again, and puts it down. His mouth opens, closes, opens again, he doesn’t know what to do. He steps forwards.

“Bokuto…” he says, reaches a hand out finally to touch along Bokuto’s back. He hits him away, hard, and Kuroo jumps back.   
  


“You said…” he hiccup's, voice nasally from a stuffed nose, “this wouldn’t happen..”   
  


Kuroo’s heart sinks, but he doesn’t respond to that.    
  


“Bokuto, we have to leave now,” is all he can think to say. Bokuto smothers his face into his owl.   
  


“Why!?” he screams into it, and Kuroo feels tears forming in his own eyes, he had never seen him like this and never knew he was capable of this.   
  
“It’s... it’s not safe here right now,” Kuroo whispers, and it makes Bokuto stand up. It makes him go to his wall of owls and pick out two more, grab some clothes from his dresser, and follow Kuroo down the hall. He passes him in a fit of rage, stomping down the staircase and slamming the front door in Kuroo’s face.    
Eventually Kuroo starts the car, and as soon as they leave the complex, Bokuto begins to sob again, loudly.    
  


Kuroo thinks he should do something, pat him on the back, but he’s driving. He decides to pull into a McDonalds drive-thru near his home.   
  


He buys Bokuto some chicken nuggets and fries, and gets him the biggest chocolate milkshake they have. Bokuto slurps on the shake and downs the food, tears never resting to stream down his full cheeks, eyes staring blankly ahead at the road. Kuroo has to force himself to pry his eyes away from the sight, mind almost unable to register this person without a smile on his face. Kuroo drives back to his place for him to spend the duration of the night, both in complete silence with only the soft hum of the engine to fill the space of tension.  

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> side note if u got the pancakes reference from the cards against humanity scene ur allowed to yell at me for referencing my own fuckin bokuroo fics in other bokuroo fics


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bokuto and Kuroo, in the midst of their drama, go to visit Kuroo's mom, who is inspired by Brent's mom from the movie GBF

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to say real quick that I read all of your comments and I'm always eager to see if there is a new one and even if I don't respond to them I assure you I love love love them and appreciate them all so thank u dudes.

Bokuto was still engulfed in his restless sleep when Kuroo woke up that morning. It was almost 9, and he knew he shouldn’t leave Bo, but he wanted to make food ready for him when he awoke, so Kuroo made his attempt to sneak out of bed without waking his friend.  


He was successful, and he began brewing coffee and trying to make mediocre eggs and bacon, but Kuroo had never been one to cook well. Once he finished with a half decent breakfast laid out, he set it aside in the microwave to stay warm for Bokuto, and sat at the table to call his mom.  


“Tetsurou!” she exclaimed on the other end, after only a few rings. “Don’t you have work this morning?”  


“No, mom, I don’t have to be there for another couple hours.”  


“That’s good then! What has you calling today then?”  


“I, uh,” he scratched the back of his neck, picking at the little hairs along his neckline. “I kinda have to bring someone with me this weekend. Maybe.”  


There was hesitation. “Who?”  


“My friend, um, Bokuto.”  


“...are they.....a boy?"  


He sucked in a breath. “Yes, mom. He’s a boy.”  


It was almost as if you could hear her smiling through the phone. “Well, any friend of yours is welcome. You should’ve given more notice though, I’ll have to make sure I have enough food to feed everyone.”  


“Well, ma, I didn’t plan this. I mean, he had a really rough night and he doesn’t have anywhere to stay except with me so...please, just, be your usual welcoming self but be sensitive with what you say. I’m not even sure if he wants to go, but I think that’d be better for him than to stay alone with Tsukki.”  


“I got it. You know, I’m proud to have raised someone who gives like you,” she sighed happily. “Bokuto sure is lucky to have you as a...er…”  


“A _friend_.”  


“Of course.” She almost sounded dejected. “Well, I’ll make up the guest bedroom, unless you’re planning on staying in your old room together--” to which Kuroo interjected with a “no,” “fine, fine--and prep some more. Make sure you call me when you leave tomorrow morning! I can’t wait to see you.”

  
“I can’t either,” he chuckled. “I’ll talk to you later, mom. Love you.”  


“Love you!”  


It stung to hang up after that, not for his own pain, but for Bokuto’s. Coming from someone with is own family being so open and loving, it was difficult to wrap his head around Bo having such cruel parents. He had no siblings to turn to, no grandparents. If Kuroo hadn’t believed in fate before, he sure as hell did then. He wondered where Bokuto would’ve wound up had he not had Kuroo to turn to.  


_Probably not in this situation_ , his thoughts so rudely interjected. But that also was true: it was Kuroo’s fault for all of this. Or, at least, it felt like it was. He had encouraged Bokuto to come out, even though he clearly should’ve known more about his family dynamic before pushing him into doing something like this. His mind turned into a battlefield of “it’s your fault” versus “but at least you can help him now” and it created the kind of headache that not even a pill could fix. His subconscious was hurting, and all he really felt that he could do was sit back and watch.  


After returning home the night before, Kuroo felt like he was holding a child--Bokuto, sipping on a milkshake, too breathless from the crying to even be able to say anything, and Kuroo sensed how broken he was, like a fragile bird who fell from the nest. He had leaned into Kuroo, staining through his shirt with tears, eventually look up at him and asking if they could watch Rick and Morty again because being with Kuroo and watching that made him feel happy and calm, reminding him of the first night they had spent together. It wasn’t until a few episodes in that Bokuto finally was able to relax, tired emotionally and physically, and curling his body against Kuroo’s. He let Bo fall asleep on him eventually, and it was a relief to see him peaceful, even if just for a moment. That didn’t last long, as Kuroo woke up with him several times that night due to tossing and turning with the occasional muffled cry, and each time, Kuroo would just hug him back against him and try to undo the damage he had done.

  
That memory. That first night. Kuroo didn’t think he would ever forget it.  


He tried poorly to take his mind off things until Bokuto woke up. He had been watching TV from the kitchen when a very exhausted Bo shuffled into the room, sitting across from him at the table and resting his cheek on his palm.

  
“Hey, good morning,” Kuroo smiled, getting up to get the breakfast he had saved. “I made you some food.”

  
Bokuto returned his smile absently, glancing up at him as he placed the plate in front of him. “Thanks.”

  
Kuroo had never seen him look so terrible. His eyes, once liquid gold, were now frozen over into a hollow, flat color. It was like the light literally had drained from them, and the circles beneath were a dark purple. Kuroo hoped that the reason he seemed even more drained than usual was because of how tired he was for the first hour after waking up, even on a good day. But Bo had spent the night dancing along the lines of painful consciousness and the ignorance of sleep, and Kuroo had beside him the entire time. He didn’t really know what he could do to really make a difference in a situation like this, so he did the little things he knew could help.  


“So, uh, I called my mom this morning,” Kuroo began, catching Bokuto’s attention after his eyes had been fixated on the strip of bacon that he was breaking into tiny pieces before eating. “She said that you could come with me this weekend. If you want. Y’know, see my hometown and meet my mom and kinda get away from everything going on around here.”

  
“I don’t wanna intrude or anything though,” he mumbled. “I appreciate the offer, but you deserve a weekend with just your mom after you haven’t seen her.”

  
Kuroo almost let it go, because he was growing nervous of pushing Bokuto into doing anything else because clearly it didn’t work so well the last time, but he couldn’t let him just wallow all weekend. “No, I mean, I insist. My mom was excited when I told her I might bring someone. Please come with me.”

  
“Look, I don’t know if I feel like sitting with you and your mom for three days while I just get it beaten into me that you have better parents than I do,” he snapped.

  
“What the fuck? I’m just trying to be polite so you don’t sit and mope around my goddamn apartment for three days.”

  
Bokuto went quiet, eyes fixated angrily at his plate. “I just don’t think I should go. I’m not in the mood.”

  
“You’re being a real asshole right now, you know?” Kuroo hissed. “You weren’t this angry last night. I’m trying to help you out.”

  
“Yeah? Just like how you tried to help me out with my parents?” he growled back, starting to raise his voice as he went on. “‘Oh, Bokuto, come out, it’ll be fine! It was fine for me and clearly my experiences are the same as every other queer kid on earth!’ Maybe I should stop taking your fucking help because it’s gotten me nowhere.”

  
“I know it’s my fault, okay?! I didn’t want it to end up like this!”

  
“And, what, I _did_?”

  
“No, I…” Kuroo ripped his fingers through his hair, feeling his chest start to sink. “I’m sorry.”

  
Hearing his apology was a reality check of Bokuto. He let his shoulders relax, leaning back against his chair and taking a few breaths. “I don’t know if sorry can fix this.”

  
Panic traveled through him. “What do you mean?”

  
“I don’t know,” he spat, standing up. “I’m gonna get out of the house for awhile.”

  
“Do you want me to bring you to your car?”

  
“No.”

  
Bokuto bitterly walked over to the door, trying and failing to not slam it behind him. Kuroo tried to take a sip of coffee, but his hands were too shaky to keep it steady. His mind was moving too slowly to understand how to keep up with the physical anxiety he was feeling, the overall sense of doom and hell and every possible negative thought that could have crossed his mind in that moment came rushing through all at once, stampeding through him and leaving him hurting and broken so badly that he had no other choice but to cry. His body was wrought with furious, violent tremors as he tried to keep in everything he was feeling in that instant, but as seconds turned into minutes, he couldn’t keep himself under control anymore. He crumpled in on himself, forcing his weight up and into his own bed before completely collapsing to lose his shit. He maintained a death grip on his pillows, forcing his face into them as deep as he could, letting his throaty, heavy sobs be muffled. He felt like a fucking idiot, like he even had a right to be upset right now when he gets to wake up tomorrow and go visit his family, his safety net, that still loves him and is there for him through everything. It was his own fault for driving away the person who meant this much to him, and in that process, ruining his life too. _Like, hey, if I’m gonna destroy all the good things I have going for me, why not take Bokuto with me?_ He had heard what Bo said, what if sorry couldn’t fix this? What if all the initial hurt never wore off? All he could think was that maybe Bokuto really would be better off without him.

  
Kuroo forced himself out of that mindest. Overthinking had clearly never done him good in the past, so it definitely wasn’t a good idea now.

  
He didn’t feel well enough to actually get up and do anything though, so the next hour consisted of him lying in bed, listening to sad slow songs until he eventually began to feel like a person again. He went out into the living room, where Tsukki had finally woken up and taken his usual seat on the couch, and sat beside him. He must’ve really looked like hell, because not even a second after seeing him, Tsukki winced.

  
“Are you okay? You look like complete shit.”

  
“Thanks, I’m just dandy,” Kuroo sourly replied. “Life is good.”

  
“What was last night all about?”

  
Tsukki had been awake and watching TV when Kuroo stumbled in with Bokuto, and the few seconds it took to walk from the doorway into Kuroo’s bedroom was all he had needed to see that something was seriously going wrong. Tsukki was smart though, keeping to himself about it and not bothering the situation. Later on into the night, he tossed two water bottles into the room as his own way of sending condolences, but there was still no explanation for him to find.

  
“Bo, uh, got kicked out. It was messy. I don’t want to get into it.”

  
“Where is he now?”

  
“I wish I could tell you,” Kuroo sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose and tilting his head back so it pressed into the back of the couch. “We got into a fight this morning.”

  
“Ah, yes, that shit is rough,” Tsukki nodded. “You should call Kenma about it. Mostly because he’s better at dealing with you than I am and also because you don’t look fit to work for the next approximate three years so, maybe tell him you’re sick.”

  
“Thanks for the advice,” Kuroo almost snapped back. He did figure he could call Kenma though, but not until after he got back up to look at himself in the mirror.

  
Christ, Tsukki was not wrong. Kuroo had always been one to have an ugly aftermath of crying, his face splotched with red and eyes still a little bloodshot, the circles under them were almost as bad as Bokuto’s earlier that morning. A bruise had formed on his jaw, up his cheekbone, and bled into his eye from the punch he took the night before. His eye’s red all around it, bursts of yellow making the bruise ugly, and part of his eye is threatening to swell shut. His hair is more of a disaster than usual, if that were even possible with his abnormal sleeping position habits. He runs his fingers through it, back and then forward and then pulled them all the way down his face, dragging down the skin in frustration. There isn’t much he could do to fix the hellscape that had become his features, so he gave up on brainstorming solutions and just hops in the shower.

  
He tries to be as quick as possible, refusing to allow in the extra time for his mind to wander into forbidden territory. Drying off and getting dressed as quickly as he can, once the door was closed behind him in his own bedroom, he dials Kenma’s number.

  
“Yeah?” he answers in a voice he uses when he thinks the call is work-related.

  
“I fucked up,” was all Kuroo manages to croak out, starting to lose his composure again after having to prepare to talk about everything that just happened.

  
“Shit, hold on,” Kenma murmurs. The sounds of shuffling and adjusting came through the phone before a reply. “Sorry, I wanted to be somewhere I can actually talk. What happened?”

  
“I made Bokuto come out. Or, maybe I didn’t _make_  him, per se, but I pushed him into it when he didn’t know better and I’m a terrible person because I was being selfish and not thinking of consequences.”

  
“Consequences? Like what?”

  
“Like, he got fucking kicked out, Kenma,” Kuroo admits, his voice finally cracking for real, his eyes welling up once again. “He got kicked out and it’s my fault.”

  
“Wait, wait...how is that your fault? You didn’t know how his parents were gonna react.”

  
“That’s the thing though. I told him how great it was for me coming out to my mom, and I don’t even know his family. I should’ve considered his safety, but I didn’t, and now he hates me and his family is pissed at him and I’m just pissed at myself for being such a moron.”

  
“Okay, slow down. First of all,” Kenma insists, pausing to let Kuroo take a breath before he continues. “This isn’t your fault. I guess you shouldn’t have pushed him to come out if he shouldn’t do that yet, yeah, but he also should know that too. If all it took was some convincing from you to make a decision like that when he knows his own family, then he probably hasn’t thought about it enough. It’s neither of your fault’s that this happened. It’s Bokuto’s parents who are the idiots here.”

  
Kuroo gives himself a moment to absorb all of what has just been said. “Hey, Kenma?”

  
“What?”

  
“What the fuck would I do without you?”  


His smile could almost be heard through the phone. “You’d go nuts. For someone so booksmart, you’d think you’d be able to reason with yourself a little better, but either way, that’s what I’m here for.”  


“Will you just be my live-in voice of reason for the rest of my life?”  


“No, that’s Tsukki’s job,” he teased. “Now I am at work though and I have to get back. You’re coming in later, right?”  


“Yeah, I will.”  


“Good because we’re understaffed and I was going to cut your hands off if you decided not to show. Speaking of which though, I really do have to go, so I’ll see you later.”  


“Okay,” Kuroo agreed, taking in a deep breath. “Thanks. I’ll see ya.”  


They end their phone call, Kuroo taking a moment to suck in as much air into his lungs as he could, letting it out slowly. Kenma is right--it isn’t really either of their faults. It’s Bokuto’s parents who were being vicious, and the two of them just reacted in ways that people who are hurting do, lashing out at themselves and each other and just trying to find some sort of reasoning that this had happened. But it was beyond their control. There isn’t anything left for them to do except try to relax, and talk it out.  


But Kuroo had no idea when Bokuto was coming back.  


Thursday rolled on into Thursday evening, and Kuroo eventually had to go to work, despite Bokuto still being gone. He left a key under the mat just in case, and then headed off.  


Working Thursdays was always Kuroo’s favorite, because it wasn’t so empty that it was boring and it wasn’t so crowded that he was overwhelmed. It was the nice medium of “it’s almost the weekend so people are starting to trickle in, but it’s not like a Saturday where literally everyone is there.” During a particular time where there had begun to be a lull, the stand was approached by a familiar, dual-colour haired boy.  


“Bokuto,” was all Kuroo managed when he saw him. He stood up straighter, his eyes softening.  


“I didn’t mean to get so mad earlier, sorry,” Bo mumbled, keeping his eyes glued to his feet. “There’s just a lot going on.”  


“I know. And I just,” he struggled to find his words. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry that this had to happen, I’m sorry some of it’s my fault, I’m sorry.”  


“Me too,” he nodded. “I’m sorry for getting angry at you, I know you were just trying to help.”  


“Yeah, yeah…” They let the space between them fill up with sounds of carnival rides and commotion from around them, but it still felt like silence hung heavily onto their shoulders.  


“If you want, uh,” Kuroo finally began again. “You can still, y’know, come with me tomorrow. To see my mom.”  


That was what brought Bokuto’s eyes up. “Really? Even after me being a dick?”  


“Of course, I mean, I was being a dick too,” he shrugged. “Plus, like, I know you said it might make you feel shitty, watching me and my mom and stuff but, she’d take you in like you’re her kid too.”  


“Oh god,” he chuckled halfheartedly. “I forgot I said that. I didn’t mean that, I was just in a shitty mood and all.”

  
“I get it, yeah...but, seriously, the offer is still there.”  


Bokuto nodded. “I’ll go then. But only if I get to make the car ride playlist.”  


“Oh, hell no, how can I trust that you’ll be as good as me at making them?” Kuroo teased, trying to bring back the air of lightness that usually sits around them.

  
It began to work. “What, you don’t believe me? I am the king of road trip playlists. I’ll prove it to you.”  


“I guess I’ll have to take your word for it then. But I get to be in charge of snacks then.”  


“Fair enough,” he shrugged, shooting Kuroo one of his goofy grins when their eyes met. They managed to shift back into keeping the mood simple and light, Bokuto climbing over the counter and sitting underneath the ledge after awhile just so he didn’t seem like the one big weird guy who always is lingering there. Before his shift ended, Kuroo snuck Bokuto a small penguin plushie that came in with their new shipment of prizes. The pink fluster of his cheeks when Bokuto grinned from ear to ear made stealing from work completely worth it. They left the carnival together, the warm fuzzy feeling sitting in Kuroo’s core. That night at home, they packed up bags together, they brushed their teeth together, they crawled into bed together, and god, it felt like that’s how it always was supposed to be. It felt so whole, like that entire time, they were just filling up the space between birth and meeting each other and being with each other like this, in the most domestic of ways. In that moment, with them lying under the Christmas lights Kuroo had draped over his window, the glow piercing through heavy darkness, illuminating the highlights of the white in Bokuto’s hair, the marks of his face, Kuroo would have kissed him. He would have grabbed him by the face and never let go. There wasn’t a doubt in his mind that he would do it, if not for the instant that he caught Bokuto breaking. He had looked over at him to say goodnight, but it came out ragged, his eyes shining with fresh tears before he quickly rolled over to face against Kuroo.

  
He rolled with him. Kuroo gently wrapped his arm around Bokuto, pulling the two into a spooning position. He felt the shaking of Bo’s chest as he tried with everything in him not to cry, but he failed anyway. They didn’t really need to say anything to each other; Kuroo wasn’t much good at consolation and Bokuto didn’t really wanna talk, and after all of the tensions from that day, they didn’t wanna risk getting themselves into another fight. But just being together, in their embrace, finally having a physical sense of stability and care, was enough for both of them to eventually drift off peacefully.

 

 

 

Kuroo’s alarm blared at 8am the next day, forcing him to roll away from Bo and turn it off. He heard Bokuto groan as it went off too; neither of them really wanted to get up and drive for four hours. Kuroo pressed his face into Bokuto’s back before letting out a muffled yell of exhaustion and forcing himself to sit up.

  
“I can make breakfast while you shower,” Bokuto murmured, craning his neck so he could look at Kuroo. “Then when you’re eating, I’ll go.”

 _  
Or we could totally just shower together,_ Kuroo thought. _Or? Not though? You fucking idiot we aren’t dating?_  His out loud response actually wound up just being, “Okay, that’s cool.”

  
The two went through their system of shower, breakfast, switch, and then before they knew it, it was 9am, they were waving goodbye to Tsukki (who grumbled a ‘good riddance’ under his breath), and heading out to Kuroo’s car.

  
They had packed relatively light, mostly due to the fact that Bokuto had very limited clothing options seeing as he still had to go back to his house and finish cleaning out his stuff. He was only a bit bigger than Kuroo though, so borrowing clothes wasn’t a huge deal. It also made Kuroo very lowkey fluttery to see Bo wearing his stuff. Beyond that though, they had necessities, some of Kuroo’s art stuff because he knew his mom would want to see him work, and their plethora of car ride snacks that all piled up next to Bokuto’s feet on the floor of the passenger side.

  
“Y’know, we don’t really need this many greasy snacks this early in the morning, but like, YOLO,” Kuroo shrugged, popping open a bag of chips that he munched on as he drove one-handed.

  
“Where else would we get our energy though?” Bokuto insisted as he sipped on his soda.

  
“Very true,” Kuroo nodded.

  
The rest of the ride went smoothly. Bokuto did end up coming in clutch with a really good playlist with tons of their favorite songs, and the couple hours spent together almost didn’t feel long enough. They were still maintaining their unspoken oath of “please let’s keep things very surface level because we’re both too emotionally fragile to get deep right now,” and it was going swimmingly. Before they knew it, they had reached the winding road that led into Kuroo’s mom’s neighborhood.

  
It was a nice place, lots of big brick houses and dogs being walked, it was just excessively far from everything. The closest anything there was to her house was a gas station that was a ten minute drive. The home was nice though: brick with brown and white paneling, a big open window in the front room, a tire swing in the front that Kuroo and all of his siblings have broken a bone on at some point. It was always nostalgic for him to come back home, and knowing he got to be there with Bokuto made him feel warm.

  
They each grabbed their bags, Kuroo deciding he’d return for his art supplies later, and headed up the porch to the door. His mother was home, so the door was unlocked, and upon walking in they were met with Kuroo’s dog before anything or anyone else. And he damn near dropped all of his shit.

  
“Hey buddy!” he exclaimed, leaning down and giving out as many pats and belly scratches and kisses as this giant fluffy dog could take. “I missed you!”

  
“What about me?” his mother frowned, rounding the corner from the kitchen and heading over to the door. “Your poor mom has missed you so much.”

  
Kuroo grinned, standing up to give her a massive hug next. “I missed you too, Mom, I wouldn’t forget to hug you.”

  
His mom was a tiny, chubby woman, with long messy dark hair that was pulled up into a ponytail. She had thick-framed glasses that she kept propped up on her head, and was basically in a perpetual state of wearing super mom-like sweaters. When she saw Bokuto though, she shot Kuroo a glance with a raised brow before pulling Bo in for a hug as well.

  
“It’s so good to meet you, Tetsurou over there talks about you nonstop.” She smiled over at a blushing Kuroo, who insisted that he didn’t. He actually hadn’t mentioned him by name to her but that one time, but she was just doing her matchmaker schtick only two minutes into their visit.

  
“Thank you so much for letting me stay!” Bokuto smiled, looking around. “I love your home!”

  
It was a pretty cute place, beige and brown walls matched with wood floor and some dark green carpet that led up the stairs. Lots of quotes and cute knick knacks decorated the walls, mismatched chairs and rugs everyone, but somehow it felt put together as a home would. Kuroo knew his mom took a lot of pride in the weird little things she managed to compile, so her smile in response was full of satisfaction. “Thank _you_  so much!”

  
But it left for a moment as she reached her hand up, rather high to rest her hand on Kuroo's bruised cheek, "what happened here...?"   
Kuroo laughs a little, "oh, I just fell is all..."   
His mom shakes her head, sighs, and rests her hands on her hips.

  
"You've always been a terrible liar, Tetsu." 

  
Kuroo arches a brow and hears the faintest of giggles behind him. 

  
"Fine, uh, I'll tell you later, it's not that bad though." 

  
His mom rolls her eyes and crosses her arms with a smile, before Kuroo decides to change the atmosphere a little.  


“I can show you where you’re staying, Bo,” Kuroo insisted, giving his mom a side glance that undoubtedly read ‘do not embarrass me please for the love of god,’ before leading Bokuto up the stairs.

  
He opened the door to a small room that was mostly empty with the exception of a few shelves and a queen-sized bed that rested in the corner. The walls were pale gray and the carpet was cream. “This is the guest room, so you can put your stuff in here.”

  
Bokuto nodded, tossing his bag on the bed before Kuroo continued. “Wanna see my room? It’s cringey as hell because I haven’t changed it since my emo phase in high school.”

  
“Um...is that even a question?”

  
“You are so right,” Kuroo grinned, pulling Bo out of the guest room and down the hall a little further. The last door was his, and upon opening it, the most prominent aspect of the bedroom was the billion posters that were halfway off the walls. “I’ve honestly been too lazy to take them down for the past four years, so...here’s this mess.”

  
Bokuto clapped his hand over his mouth to hold back his laughter. Any emo or alternative band that you could think of had a poster with its place on Kuroo’s walls. That was all that had really been left behind too, considering Kuroo had needed to take as many of his belongings as possible with him when he moved. It was mostly posters, a full bed, and a desk that was still cluttered with old notebooks and sketchbooks and anything else an angsty 17 year old boy would have had.

  
“Why haven’t you gone and thrown this stuff out?” Bokuto inquired, touching his hand to an Asking Alexandria poster. “Like, you graduated how many years ago?”

  
“It’s been three years, yeah,” Kuroo chuckled. “I’m just always too lazy to do it when I come home, and mom says it reminds her of me more when she comes in to clean. Plus no one’s ever in here when they visit because of the guest room and the other two bedrooms that belonged to significantly less cringey children. I’m the only person who ever goes in her to actually hang around, and I’ve never bothered to change anything.”

  
“How late did your emo phase go if all of this was still up when you graduated?”

  
“Well, I had a bit of a scene phase in middle school, as one does,” Kuroo explained. “But then I got all fuckboy-ish for awhile and then for the last year of high school I wasn’t full on emo outwardly, but I still listened to all of the respective musicians.”

  
“And then what happened?”

  
“It faded out about halfway through my first year of college. I made friends who had better taste than all of the bullshit Kenma would recommend to me, and we both eventually outgrew all of it. But it’s still fun to make fun of.”  


“I can tell,” Bokuto snickered, wandering over to the cluttered desk. “Do you have any angsty poetry?”  


“No, oh my god,” Kuroo snorted. “I wasn’t _that_ emo.”  


“You can never be too sure,” Bo shrugged, turning back around and flopping onto the bed. “Glad I get to have a little taste of the life of high school you.”  


Kuroo lied down beside him. “I’m glad too. I’m actually really excited to have you here this weekend.”  


“Why’s that?”  


“Because you get to hang out with my mom and I can show you all the cool shit around town that I used to do when I was in high school. It’s like being nostalgic but with someone who, thankfully, didn’t carry over from those dark ages.”  


“Well, didn’t Kenma and Tsukki know you in high school?”  


“Yeah, but they’re the exceptions,” Kuroo elaborated. “See, I’ve known Kenma since I was practically born, he used to live down the street. So that shit was a lifelong bond. And Tsukki I met through volleyball and we were both so jaded and bitter about life and school that we bonded and the bond stuck because we both wound up going to the same university.”  


“And Kenma?”  


“He does his school online.”  


Bo nodded in understanding. “Sounds cool. I like going to college with other people though.”  


“Yeah, but Kenma’s different. We all thought he had social anxiety or some shit, but then it turned out he just has zero tolerance for anyone who’s a fucking idiot, so he didn’t wanna put himself through the hell of dealing with the pretentious kids who are English majors.”  


“Is that what he’s studying?”  


“Yeah. He loves learning about it, he just hates having to hear people’s cheesy poetry and short stories or whatever. He’s more technical about it all, and if the plot sucks, he gets so salty about it.”  


Their conversation had trailed off so far into countless topics, that they didn’t even realize it was almost dinner until Kuroo’s mom called up the stairs to ask if they were ever coming back down. Because that totally didn’t make it seem like they were upstairs fucking.  


Dinner was just as nerve-wracking though, because then began the seemingly endless game of twenty questions from Kuroo’s mom.  


“So, Kuroo, how has studying been?” she asked sweetly, sipping on her wine.  


“It’s been pretty good, y’know, lots of hand cramps and having to buy pencils every month,” he teased.  


“Oh hush, you say that as if you don’t enjoy it.”  


“I don’t think anyone can enjoy carpal tunnel, Mom.”  


Worry overtook her expression. “Carpal tunnel? Have you spoken to a doctor about it?”  


“No, it was a joke, I’m fine,” Kuroo insisted. “My wrist does get sore after awhile though.”  


“You should talk to a doctor about helping that though. Better to prevent an injury before it happens.”  


He nodded. “I will, don’t worry.” Knowing fully well he was not going to see a doctor, and the best medicine he had was tylenol and viciously shaking his sore hand around until the numbness and pain subsided before he would get back to work.  


“Well, what else is new? You never tell me hardly anything anymore. How’s work, is Kenma still giving you a hard time? You know, if he ever does, you should remind him of the time he shit in the kiddie pool. Take him down a notch.”

  
“Mom, that literally was twenty years ago. And mentioning that to size myself up stopped working when we were like, fourteen.” He heard Bokuto suppress a giggle at that thought.  


“Well, don’t let him get too pushy either way.”  


“He’s my boss, that’s his job.”  


“Oh, you know what I mean,” she waved him off, rolling her eyes. “You know, you have so many stories with Bokuto. Why is it that I’m only just now meeting him?”  


Kuroo felt the nerves rising up the hairs of his neck. “I don’t talk about him that much. I’ve mentioned him, sure, but I know I just haven’t really said his name.”  


“Is he the same boy as the one you mentioned from work? The loud one?”  


“No, no, that’s Tanaka,” he corrected, looking over at Bokuto who was still smiling from watching the interaction. “Bo is, um, the guy I mentioned who likes owls.”  


“Oh, I remember now!” Kuroo’s mother exclaimed, turning her attention to Bokuto for the first time since the conversation about him had started. “Tetsurou mentioned your collection, he said it was cute.”  


“Oh, did he?” Bokuto laughed, looking over at Kuroo.

  
He felt his face flood with heat. “Mom, that’s not how I said it.”

  
She shot him a knowing look. “Sure, sure, whatever. But I do remember him talking about you now. What are some of your other interests though, Bokuto? Besides owls, at least.”  


The conversation completely shifted after that. It became a lot less of an interrogation between Kuroo and his mom, and a lot more of Bokuto babbling excited responses to each of her questions, which prompted more questions, which prompted more responses, and the cycle continued. It sent flares of delight throughout Kuroo’s chest; it was a really nice feeling to know that your love interest and your mom were getting along so well. He knew that even if his mom were completely against him dating, even she would be able to give her blessing to their relationship.

  
He shook his head, _don’t think like that._

  
It was still a pleasant thought to have theoretically, but he needed to fight with himself to keep his mind out of the gutter.

  
After they all cleared their plates, Kuroo was the one to offer to do dishes so he could let his mom and Bokuto continue on with their conversations. By that point, they had transitioned into talking about a particular movie that they both loved from the 80s, one Kuroo had spent his entire childhood watching countless times alongside her. It was soothing, hearing only the sound of his two favorite people in the world chattering back and forth as well as the rushing of the sink. It was another sensation of home to him, one that tugged at his heart and made him long for the domesticity with Bokuto that he had been learning the full wonder of in the last two days. As each second ticked by, he found it harder and harder to keep his longing under control, so luckily, as he sat back down at the kitchen table, Bokuto excused himself to the upstairs bathroom.

  
The instant he was gone, Kuroo’s mother looked at him. “You like him, don’t you?”

  
“I don’t really wanna talk about this with you, Mom--”

  
“Oh, shush, I’ve seen you making googly eyes at him all night and I can see why. He’s sweet, he’s charming, and he’s easy on the eyes. Why don’t you just go for it?”

  
“Because, it’s...complicated.”

  
She shook her head, clicking her tongue disapprovingly. “Tetsurou, you and your desire for simplicity, I will never understand it. I feel like you’re just afraid of falling in love.”

  
“Yeah, I mean, I kinda am,” he admitted. “It’s hard to process…” he pauses, and in a mocking tone says, “love”, before continuing. “Like, I can barely work through easy stuff, so something as huge as a serious relationship just feels like it’s beyond my emotional capacity.”

  
“Will you let me give you a word of advice?”

  
Kuroo sighed, staring into her eyes which were filled with nothing but love and hope. “Sure, hit me.”

  
“Stop holding yourself back. You’ve done this ever since you were young--you let fear control the way you handle things. You’re afraid of what, rejection? Embarrassment? Yeah, those aren’t fun emotions to deal with ever, but it only took me two minutes to realize that this boy means so much more to you than I think even you realize, and the risk is outweighed by how happy you would be if you just, y’know, went for it.”

  
He took a moment to sift through all of what had just been said. His mom was always good at seeing right through him. He knew she was right--she knew him better than anyone did--but it was still stressful for him to really process. Nodding and letting out an agreeing sigh, he finally replied. “Thank you.”

  
“Of course, love,” she smiled, her soft, close-lipped smile that left little crinkles near the corners of her eyes, like a fork pressed into soft dough. It was infectious, so naturally, Kuroo smiled too.

  
It wasn’t long before Bokuto returned, livening up the conversation as he had before they left. The three of them decided to get a bunch of blankets from the laundry room and all pile in on the couch to watch a movie before turning in for the night. Bokuto had easily assimilated into their little family as if he was returning home too, so Kuroo, buried under comforters between his mom and his best friend, had never felt the kind of joy he was experiencing right then. The movie they turned on was the aforementioned 80s movie that his mom and Bokuto loved--Pee Wee's Big Adventure. As a jaded teenager, Kuroo always thought the movie was stupid with bad humor, and granted, it wasn’t the greatest, but it matched his mom’s humor which flooded him with nostalgia, so seeing it again after a few years was a comfort.

  
By the end of the film, Kuroo’s mom hadn’t managed to stay awake, neither had his dog. Brie, the big old fluffy dog beside him, named after his mothers favourite cheese for some reason, feet were twitching as she slept deeply with little snores coming from her nose every once in a while. It was nearly 10pm and she was dozing off, so he gently shook her and reminded her that she should go upstairs. Giving him a kiss on the forehead and a goodnight, she left Kuroo and Bokuto to themselves.

  
“Okay, it’s official,” Bokuto announced as soon as she left. “I love your mom. Please adopt me.”

  
“I’m sure she’d love that,” Kuroo laughed, shaking his head. “I’m so glad you guys like each other so much though. You’re probably gonna pass up Kenma on her list of my friends that are her favourites.”

  
“What an honor,” he chuckled, his smile quickly being wiped away as silence settled between them. His distractions faded, and Kuroo noticed the slightest glint of tears blooming in the corners of Bokuto’s eyes.

  
“It just...sucks, you know?” he began, looking over at Kuroo, lip trembling. “Like, I could have this too. But my parents just don’t love me enough.”

  
“Bo…” Kuroo soothed, pulling a now crying Bokuto against him. It wasn’t ugly crying like the night before, but a steady stream of tears as he tries to keep himself together. “They love you. They just have their own bigotry to work through before they can understand. You’re still their son, and they care about you just as much now as they did before. They just...have their own shit going on that’s making them assholes.”

  
“I know you mean well, god I do, but this isn’t new,” he sniffed. “It’s not like they had movie nights under blankets or home cooked meals or even something as small as asking more about me. They’ve always been distant, they’ve always treated me like I’m stranger, Kuroo. They just separated themselves more and more from me and they’re less of parents than they are just people who live down the hall.”

  
Kuroo tried to speak, but he was cut off by Bokuto continuing. “Don’t take this personally, like I’m angry that you have a good family or something, because if there is anyone who deserves it, it’s you, but...I’m just angry that my family had such a massive window of time to change and be good and be happy and they just …...didn’t.”

  
“Then fuck them,” Kuroo spat out, lifting Bokuto back up so he could look at him. “Fuck them, if they can’t see how wonderful you are then you shouldn’t dare waste time on them. They don’t deserve you, Bo. If they’re too blinded by their own egos to look and see their interesting, amazing, beautiful fucking child, then they don’t deserve shit.” After finishing his rant, he realized how _gay_  it sounded, but at that point, it was too late and he didn’t even care as his face heated up more and more as the seconds ticked by at Bokuto staring at him, wide eyed.

  
Bokuto smiled, getting even more teary as he did. “Thank you so much. For everything.”

  
“Anytime,” Kuroo grinned back, pulling him into a hug again. “And fuck it, you’re officially part of my family now. My mom’ll love you no matter what because that’s just how she is, and Kita and Fumio would see just as clearly how fuckin’ cool you are.”

  
“I’ll gladly accept that invitation,” Bokuto nodded, before pulling away from the hug just enough to press his forehead against Kuroo’s, noses brushed against each other’s.

 _  
God, is it still the wrong time to kiss him?_ Kuroo struggled with thinking. He did just invite Bokuto to be like a brother to him, or did he know Kuroo meant it in a different way? He thought back to his mother’s advice about just taking the chance without being so terrified of falling short. One second turned into two, and before he could even realize it, he and Bokuto had been like that for much longer than just a lingering moment. Kuroo’s breath was shaky, leaning towards him in fragments of millimeters. Bokuto’s eyes gave off a similar vibe, and Kuroo notices his fingers twitching together in his lap. When he looks up again Bokuto is staring right into him, eyes half lidded, just a little, mouth slightly open. The light from the television illuminated his cheeks and pretty long eyelashes so beautifully. God, he wanted to kiss him so badly, he had no idea why he wasn’t just doing it. He finds himself slowly leaning in, subconsciously, but he wasn’t leaning in for a kiss, just to get closer at this point. Before he could make up his goddamned mind about _actually_ kissing him, though, Bokuto sat back, a fiery blush on his cheeks.

  
“Maybe, uh, we should sleep,” he stuttered. “We didn’t get a whole lot of rest last night so…”

  
Kuroo nodded a little too eagerly. “Yeah,” Kuroo says, blinking wildly. He takes in the situation and then snaps his body back so quickly he thinks he may have hurt his back or something. “Yeah, yeah,” he repeats, blinking and staring off into nothing, he continues on. “Uh, the movie totally tired me out a lot too. Plus, I know tomorrow Mom wants to take us out to breakfast and she’ll kick my ass if I sleep in too long.”

  
“How could we ever sleep through eating pancakes?” Bokuto teased. Deja vu flashed through both of their minds again though. What the fuck was their connection with pancakes that made them feel so strange? They brushed it off anyway.

  
They headed up the stairs together, completing their usual bathroom routine together before saying their final goodnights and splitting off into their respective rooms. Kuroo had a hard time going to sleep though, lovesick regret overflowing his mind.

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EVERYTIME I MENTION PANCAKES I LOSE MY SHIT AND I APOLOGIZE FOR SLIPPING BAD INSIDE JOKE MEMES INTO FICS THAT PPL THAT DONT KNOW ME READ
> 
> I APPRECIATE THAT YOU ALL HAVE STAYED THANK U


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was gonna merge these two chapters together bc this one's just under 3k but I didn't and it's finished so here's 2 chapters in a day even if it's short!

Bokuto’s invitation into Kuroo’s family because living reality by the end of the following day. They went out to breakfast, and then Bokuto got the grand tour of Kuroo’s hometown as they drove around afterwards, and then his mom treated them to candy and chocolate from their local sweet shop in the downtown area. Once they were back home, Kuroo worked on his art while the three of them just continued chatting and keeping each other company until nightfall. They watched another movie after dinner that night, except this time, Kuroo’s mom knew when she needed to turn in, so she avoided the issue of falling asleep on the couch. After she went upstairs though, Kuroo and Bokuto continued on watching.  
  


The difference was though, that after she left, Bokuto leaned his head against Kuroo’s shoulder and wrapped his arm around his torso. Kuroo felt his heart rate pick up, and honestly, how could it not? He was being snuggled into by someone who there’s surreal amounts of romantic and sexual tension with. He tried to just pay attention to what was playing on the screen, but it was difficult to do when he was too busy being hyperaware of every touch, every breath, every slight movement coming from the body beside him. It was getting to the point of being unbearable right as the movie began to end. Saved by the fuckin’ bell.   
  


Bokuto sat up and stretched as the credits rolled. “I think I’m gonna shower tonight so I don’t have to worry about it tomorrow morning.”   
  


“Good plan,” Kuroo nodded, standing up to put some desperately needed distance between the two of them for the moment. “I’m probably gonna just lie down.”   
  


“Okay!” he grinned, leading the way for the two of them to go up the stairs. Bokuto stopped in his room to get clean clothes before heading off into the bathroom, and Kuroo just went directly to his room in an awkward jog, trying his hardest not to slam the door behind him.   
  


He let out a shaky sigh of relief, the tension that had built up through the movie getting to him so much more than it had before. He threw his shirt off, heading to the downstairs bathroom to brush his teeth as quickly as he could, so he could go back upstairs and seclude himself long enough to get off.   
  


He turned the light off, and a comfortable amount of darkness settled around him. The only light that came through was the faint streaks of yellow light from the street lamp that shone through his window. He hadn’t been able to jack off in the last few days due to Bokuto being around or just being too tired to, but that was definitely catching up to him right then. He lies down on his back on his bed, blankets covering just up to his calves. He reaches a hand down, palms himself through his boxers until he starts reacting to his own touches. He closes his eyes, runs his free hand through his hair, wishing it wasn’t just his own hand tugging and pulling. Thoughts of Bokuto flooded his mind, reminded of the dream he had however many nights ago, he plays it again in his mind before he’s letting himself spring free from the now very tight confinements of his underwear. He lets out a shuddering sigh, a lot louder than he anticipated, so he claps a hand over his mouth. He moves his hand up, rubs the tip slowly with his thumb just how he likes it before quickly beginning to move his hand up and down at a fairly quick pace. He starts going at it, desperately seeking a bit of relief.    
  


“B-” he stutters.. “Bokuto…”   
  


He’s sighing and gasping, eyes lidded and clouded over in a lustful haze. He chokes on a rather harsh breath in, can feel the familiar warm feeling of orgasm starting to stir in him. But it was all fun and games until he heard a light knock on his door. He froze in his tracks, trying to take a second to calm down before answering because he had been closer to finishing than starting, before frantically pulling the blankets over top of himself. “Uh, yeah?” he croaks out, clearing his throat after hearing how raspy it was.   
  


Kuroo wasn’t sure if it would’ve been worse if it was his mom or Bokuto, but it wound up being the latter. “Hey, uh, what are you doing?” he asks, creaking the door open and then closing it behind him.   
  


Kuroo thanks the darkness for masking his vicious blush. “I, uh, nothing, why?” he lies.

  
“Oh, I’m not really tired enough to sleep,” he shrugs, sitting on the empty side of Kuroo’s bed, which prompts Kuroo to sit up too, backing up just a little to put some distance in between them. “Plus, I thought I heard you saying my name, so I wanted to see.”  
  


Kuroo is about ready to lose his shit. He shifts, beginning to feel his heart racing. “I, uh, I don’t really, um, I-I...wasn’t saying anything, uh, I think,” he manages to stutter out. He makes a mental note to work on _not_  being so loud about who he was thinking about while getting off.   
  


“Are you okay?”   
  


“Me? Well, y-yeah, I’m just, um, fine, y’know, just...chillin’.”   
  


Kuroo swallows, hard, and uses his hands to discreetly cover the bulge showing in the blankets. Bokuto smiles fondly as a response.    
  


“You sure you weren’t saying my name or anything…?” he says, practically purring.   
  


“Yes!” Kuroo snaps, and before he knows it he’s rambling again.   
  


“I had this crazy, weird fuckin’ dream man,” he starts, and clears his throat again in a failing effort to calm his voice and heavy breathing. “I was with you and we were in this nice park, and then like...uhm…. Michael Buble, just like, came out of nowhere. He...he was like ‘who are you’ and for some reason you couldn’t speak? So I had to answer for you, but like, Michael was hard of hearing, so I, had to say it a bunch of times…” he trails off at the end of the sentence, hands frozen in the air mid-animated from explaining his made up dream, when he notices Bokuto staring at him. Bokuto’s looking at him with one raised eyebrow and an amused look on his face. He looks down, hands twitching like he wants to reach out, and then back up at Kuroo.    
  


“W-what…?” he asks nervously.   
  


“Then what’s this right here…?” Bokuto says so softly Kuroo almost doesn’t hear. When he looks down to follow his eyes to where Bokuto is pointing, he notices he took his hands off of his stupid, fuckin, raging god damned boner, and it hasn’t gone down very much by the time his story was finished. Bokuto slides his hands up the sheets, curls them a little in his fist and starts to slowly tug it down.   
  


Kuroo stutters, looks at Bokuto, then around his room. He blurts out the first thing he can think of.   
  


“You know, dude, Michael Buble, he’s a real uh, hottie…” and Kuroo wants to die.   
  


It was growing clearer by the second that Bokuto has known exactly what was going on from the start, he’s just being a dick about it. Kuroo’s breathless stumbling over words as he tries to explain himself further, only gets worse, and as it gets worse, he gets shakier, and by the time he finds a resolution as to what he should do, Bokuto has most of the blanket covering Kuroo in his fist, eyes still locked on him, and Kuroo is practically turned into a goddamn mess of hormonal desire.   
  


It’s dark, but Kuroo can see Bokuto’s expression clearly, unsure but hungry, as he tugs the blanket down a little more, leans in just a _lit_ _tle bit_ more. Eventually, Kuroo lets out a shuddering sigh when the blanket is tugged off, and reaches his hand down quickly to cover himself. He tugs his eyes away, turning his head and closing them as the blush across his face deepens. His hand is slowly moved away, and Bokuto leans in, hands now on either side of Kuroo, body hovering above him as he reaches into his personal space and slips his head down to rest their foreheads together.   
  


“I know what you were dreaming about,” he whispers, and Kuroo’s heart skips a beat. Kuroo feels the fighting spirit in him bubble up, running on pure instinct.

  
“N-no you don’t…” he sighs, right onto Bokuto’s lips. They’re so close, so close he can feel Bokuto smile softly, and then one of his hands is sliding down his torso to touch lightly at his navel. Kuroo hitches in a breath, and Bokuto moves his hand lower. Traces one single finger up the base to the tip of his cock, and Kuroo instinctively and involuntarily, bucks his hips up, hard and fast enough for his dick to make an obscene smack against his stomach again when his hips make their way back down.  
  


“Yeah, I do,” he whispers.   
  


All in the same instant, Kuroo pulls himself forward to thread his fingers through Bo’s hair, pushing him forward so their lips can crash together. He works both of their lips apart, and lets out the softest whine as he did. They let their tongues wander through the open space created within their mouths, Bokuto resisting the urge to smile as he gently but strongly presses Kuroo down harder into the bed. Working his kisses along Kuroo’s jaw, he pauses at his ear. “How much longer were you planning on lying about what you were doing before you were gonna let me help?”   
  


“I-I don’t… know…” Kuroo breathes, trying to keep his chill for at least another few seconds. “But, Bokuto…”   
  


“Hm?” he pulls his head up enough to be able to look at Kuroo again.  
  
He wants to say ‘I don’t want this to just be sex’, but he loses that thought when Bokuto gets impatient and roughly bites and sucks at a spot on his neck, nose pressing firmly into his skin and forcing Kuroo’s neck to move a little to the side.  
  


Bokuto grins against Kuroo’s flushed skin. He whispers mantras of Bokuto’s name into the air and it just spurs the other on. Grabbing and roughly moving Kuroo around even more impatiently, and Kuroo lets him. 

  
“Bo-Boku… _fuck.._ _._ ”  
  


Bokuto licks at his neck, hand ghosting around his dick. “That’s not my name,” he whispers into his skin, so Kuroo can feel each word pressed down there, firmly, “maybe you should say it properly.”   
  


Kuroo gasps and throws his head back at that, it’s entirely too hot and he’s remembering how he had felt weeks ago in the shack at the carnival. But now it was even hotter, sheets soft and comforting as Bokuto whispered filth into him, palming up and down Kuroo’s dick and watching him fall apart underneath his touches.   
  


“ _Bokuto_ ,” Kuroo whines, hands fumbling at the sheets, eventually scrambling up to grab loosely at Bokuto’s back. Bokuto hums approval into his skin and Kuroo positively melts.  
  


“Hey,” Kuroo groans, and Bokuto looks up at him, still loosely getting him off. Kuroo grabs Bokuto’s face with his hands and pulls him forwards, slotting their mouths together and takes over the kiss with the eagerness he’s been suppressing for _so fucking long._ When Bokuto moans into the kiss Kuroo practically loses his shit, sitting up immediately to straddle Bokuto’s thighs, sticking his hand down Bokuto’s cute little owl pajama pants to pull out his hard dick. Kuroo feels like he’s losing himself, he isn’t thinking rationally anymore, overcome with a crash of all of the feelings he’s been bottling up. He’s grabbing around the sides of Bokuto’s chest, raking his nails along them and leaving pretty red trails in his wake, pulling Bokuto closer as roughly as he can, desperate thoughts swimming around on repeat in his mind.

 

_closer, more, mine._   


 

Biting his lips, Bokuto lets Kuroo take over for a moment and just supports Kuroo’s hips as he grinds their cock’s together while sitting in Bokuto’s lap. Moaning into each others mouths, latched lips broken momentarily to puff hot air onto each other, before quickly and passionately repeating the rough kissing over and over until they can’t kiss anymore and just pant into each others mouths.    
Kuroo’s thighs are shaking, and Bokuto is holding him and following Kuroo’s movements as he grinds down into him, pushing and pulling his ass away and then back towards him. The friction is way too good for them to keep completely quiet.

  
“Kuroo,” Bokuto says, and Bokuto’s voice, hoarse and low with arousal, makes Kuroo burry his face into Bokuto’s nape, biting him, in order to muffle the loud moan that makes it’s way past his trembling lips.  
  


“Kuroo, Kuroo,” Bokuto says, latching onto Kuroo’s neck and sucking so feverishly Kuroo thinks he may pass out, right now, or of embarrassment if anyone (especially his mother) was to see the dark, dark purple hickey that will no doubt be taking the place of Bokuto’s lips.    
  


“Kuroo, I’m… I’m cumming…!” he groans into him, and Kuroo feels filthy and high at the same time, stopping his grinding to quickly pump Bokuto himself. Kuroo doesn’t know what he’s saying or what he means when he repeats “please, please, please,” over and over into Bokuto’s ear and leaves him with warm goosebumps. Bokuto groans, cries out, and he cums first, a pretty pink blush spread all across his cheeks and neck as his eyebrows draw together and eyes shut tight. Pushing his hips up into Kuroo’s hand, he rides it out as he paints Kuroo’s stomach all over. Kuroo simply stares at Bokuto as he comes down, taking it all in, before there’s a hand on his dick as well, and he arches his back forwards with a choked gasp.   
  


“I’m not forgetting you,” Bokuto whispers, kissing Kuroo again with vigor and Kuroo lets himself drown in the kiss, let’s Bokuto push his tongue inside and taste him as much as he wants to. Kuroo hums high pitched “mmh”s into Bokuto’s mouth as he starts to buck, uncoordinated, into Bokuto’s hand. Bokuto’s other hand is on the small of his back, guiding his hips up and away and Kuroo doesn’t feel it coming when he let’s out a choked really, _really loud_  full fledged moan into Bokuto’s mouth. He surges forwards, pressing himself into Kuroo to try to stifle it even a little, as Kuroo clutches to Bokuto’s back and rakes his nails along the skin again, scratching as he cums so hard he see’s white flash behind his eyes.   
  
Kuroo pants heavy against Bokuto's shoulder, before he's dropping and falling backwards until his back hits the bed and his head hits the pillow again. Bokuto giggles and crawls over top of him to watch as he comes down. Kuroo opens his eyes and see's Bokuto watching him, and he panics.   
  
"Uh..." he says, breath coming out in shallow puffs, "y-yeet.." he says, raising his fist up slightly in the air to pump it towards the ceiling.   
  
Bokuto laughs, loudly, burying his face in the crook of Kuroo's neck.   
  


The two clean up sleepily before falling side by side into their pillows. Breathing heavy into his, Kuroo pulls Bokuto as close to him as he could get, turning so he can keep kissing him. These kisses were softer--breathless afterglow kisses that he never wants to end. While Kuroo runs his fingers all up and down Bo’s neck and through his hair, Bokuto traces up along Kuroo’s lower back and hips with only the tips of his fingers.    
  


“Hey, Bo?” Kuroo mumbles against his lips, heart pounding in his throat as his stomach twisted, telling him not to say it.   
  


“Hm?”   
  


“I like you so much.”   
  


Bokuto breaks the kissing by grinning too much to bring it back. “I like you too.”   
  


Kuroo can't help but just laugh, so elated he felt like floating. “Fuck...I’ve wanted to say that since the day I met you.”   
  


“I kinda figured that out awhile ago,” Bokuto chuckles. “You’re terrible at being subtle sometimes.”   
  


“Oh, fuck you, why didn’t you say something? Put me out of my goddamn misery.”   
  


“Why would I do that? It was cute.”   
  


Kuroo feels himself turn red all over again. “You’re a dick, either way. But for right now, you’re a dick that should go to sleep because I’m tired.”   
  


“Me too,” Bokuto smiles, wrapping his arm around Kuroo’s torso, curling into his side. “I hope you didn’t think I was gonna go back to my room or anything like that.”   
  


“Oh, god no,” Kuroo insists, planting a kiss on the top of Bo’s head and pulling the blanket over them more. “I like this more.”   
  


“Me too.”   
  


“You know what else I like?”   
  


“What?”   
  


“The fact that this beautiful poster of the ultimate sex god daddy, Kellin Quinn, got to watch me nut on a hot guy,” he snorts, yanking down a Sleeping With Sirens poster that hung within reach above his bed. He waves the poster in Bo’s face. “I bet he’s jealous.”   
  


Bokuto bursts out into ugly laughter, pushing Kuroo’s arm away. “Oh my god, way to ruin a cute moment. But I also am so thankful that the entire 2010 Warped Tour lineup got to watch us fuck.” He gestures around the room, soliciting a cackle from Kuroo.   
  


“Sounds like emo me’s wet dream,” he continues, letting his and Bokuto’s chuckling die down into sleepy breaths. They curl in closer together, and it doesn’t take long for them to doze off. It's the easiest either of them have been able to sleep in a long time. That was another thing Kuroo notices: sleeping with Bokuto was immensely more comfortable than sleeping alone ever had been. And now, with all of his sexual and romantic tension relieved for the night, it was simple to slip into a sound sleep.

 

 

 


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> u know the kid from the jhonny jhonny yes papa video? how he shovels sugar into his fucking mouth? reading this chapter is like doing that.

That morning, Kuroo woke up to being the receiving end of sleepy kisses, trailing all along his jaw. He rolled over to face the source, and opened his eyes only to be staring into a familiar pair of melty golden irises. He couldn’t help but smile, not wanting to be pinched if this were really a dream.  
  
But it wasn’t.  
  
“Morning,” Bokuto grinned, planting another kiss on his cheek. “Any sexy dreams about Michael Buble?”  
  
“Oh, fuck off,” Kuroo stretched, too tired to protest him effectively. Instead, he cuddled into him as he relaxed, pushing his face into the crook of Bo’s neck. “I’m actually awake, right?”  
  
“I’m still kind of asking myself that, but I wanna hope yes.”  
  
“God, my mom is gonna be so smug when she finds out,” Kuroo chuckled, soaking in every blissful bit of contact between them.  
  
“What do you mean?”  
  
He realized they hadn’t exactly established a relationship or anything out loud, and Kuroo felt his blush returning once he became aware that he jumped the gun a little bit. “I mean, uh, she always was on my case about finding a boy. So, I kinda figured you’d be that boy.”  
  
“Is this your romantic way of asking me out?”  
  
“Maybe? Only if you say yes.” Kuroo pulled his head up to look at Bo.  
  
“Of course,” he grinned. “I’ve been waiting long enough, god damn.”  
  
“Did I really keep you waiting that long?” Kuroo asked sheepishly. “I always just thought you didn’t feel the same way.”  
  
“You know, I think _you're_  more oblivious than you _think_  I am. Adding a bro onto the end of a sentence doesn’t make the content way less gay.”  
  
“Okay, you know, fuck you, bro,” Kuroo teased, pushing Bokuto away more. “Maybe I was just being friendly. Letting you know you’re a bro to me.”  
  
“Uh huh, sure,” Bokuto laughed before mimicking Kuroo’s voice. “Oh, Bo, you’re so beautiful and you’re the only reason work is bearable oh here let me gaze into your eyes and lead you on,  _bro._ "   
  
Kuroo covered his face with both hands, groaning as he dragged them down in embarrassment. “Am I that bad?”  
  
“No. But it was still _pretty_ bad.”  
  
“If I was so terrible, why didn’t you make the first move? Like, come on, I was dying over here.”  
  
“Because it’s really funny to see you try to no homo your way out of everything, I’m actually a little sad that I have to see that era of you go away.”  
  
Kuroo groaned again, rolling over and mashing his face into the pillow before forcing himself up. “We should probably go and eat. My mom usually goes out to get dog food and stuff on sundays, so if we prep some food before she gets back, it’ll make her day.”  
  
“But I don’t wanna get up,” Bokuto whined, pulling at Kuroo’s arm. “Can’t I just enjoy the first morning I have where I don’t have to suppress being gay with you when we wake up?”  
  
“No, because we have plenty of other days to do that,” he smiled, kissing Bo’s forehead before actually getting up off the bed. He pulled a sweatshirt over his head and hiked up a pair of skinny jeans before being stopped by Bokuto, who was now standing up too.  
  
“I wanna wear that hoodie,” he stated in a way that made it seem more like he was asking to. “It’s my favorite of yours.”  
  
Kuroo went pink as Bokuto stepped up to face him, tugging on the sweatshirt by the pockets, using a cheesy pouty face to convince him. “Honestly, fugg you,” Kuroo mumbled,  
taking off the hoodie so Bokuto could wear it. “I need to wear this to cover up my neck as much as possible.”  
  
“That’s another reason why I want this hoodie,” he smirked, slipping on the hoodie. “I wanna admire what’s left of last night.”  
  


As if Bo didn’t already just look cute in his clothes to begin with, Kuroo turned into a gay, blushing mess when Bokuto pulled him in to kiss him again, running his fingers up and down Kuroo’s bare chest and neck, touching at the sensitive spots that were purpled with marks from the night before, which of course, sent a chill through his entire body.

  
“Don’t be so... _gay_ …” he murmured, wrapping his arms around Bokuto’s waist.

  
“But I like being gay with you, I’ve had to wait this long, I don’t wanna stop being gay,” he laughed, continuing to trail his hands just a little too close to the button of Kuroo’s pants, to which his response was to flinch and make a semi-inhuman noise that was a mix of surprise and desire. It kinda killed the moment though, admittedly.

  
“We can be _that_  kind of gay later,” he promised as he pulled a different shirt over his head, paired with an older sweatshirt he dug out of his closet. “But right now, I wanna make some food and be a good little Christian boy with mother dearest for the next few hours before we leave.”

  
“Fine, fine,” Bokuto nodded, giving Kuroo one last quick kiss before the two headed downstairs.

  
The two went through, making breakfast in almost a daze. Kuroo became so much more aware of each brush of Bokuto’s fingers against the small of his back, the soft smiles that would overtake his expression when their eyes met, it was like the feeling of finally getting a new prescription when your old glasses are three years overdue. He was seeing everything so much clearer now, and all he wanted to see was Bokuto. He craved to retrace back through every moment they’ve shared, and do it over, but this time with him being less fearful, and just acting without overthinking. He would’ve kissed him so many times, he would’ve held him a little closer, begged him to stay a little longer. If his emotions were a mess before, then fuck, they definitely were now. Kuroo couldn’t understand how he hadn’t seen so many of the signs that pointed to this outcome, from weeks and months before. It was surreal that he deprived himself of the pure joy welling within him, just because he was being a pussy.

  
His follow up thought was what really helped him come to a more concrete idea on all of this: fate. Maybe it wouldn’t have been right to get together before any of this. Maybe some god out there instilled it in Kuroo that he needed to be afraid and wait until the absolute best moment for things to work out in his favor.  
  
Or maybe he was just thinking too much again.  
  
He refused to let himself get too caught up in himself again, so as an act of rebellion to his own weird habits, he pulled Bokuto towards him again so he could hug him close.  
  
“You’re the one who said we shouldn’t be so gay,” Bo teased, squeezing Kuroo and lifting him up just enough that his toes still brushed the floor.  
  
“Shhh, just let me contradict myself for a minute,” he murmured against Bokuto’s skin, swaying with the movement of the two’s shifting feet. “Mom’s not home yet so just...let me be close to you.”  
  
Bokuto laughed because there’s not much else to do when someone says something as, well, _gay_  as that. Kuroo only let their embrace linger for another few seconds, before he heard the French toast start to burn. And Bo responded to that fuck up by heckling him every time he went to make the next ones.  
  
“You know, if you’re the French toast king, you make them then, dickhead,” Kuroo responded, rolling his eyes. “I refuse to take this abuse from you.”  
  
“Maybe if you didn’t suck at doing anything over a stove, I wouldn’t have to harass you,” Bokuto insisted, stepping up beside Kuroo to try to help him cook all of their food evenly.  
  
Right around then was when they heard the closing of the front door. “Oh god, are you boys awake and is my kitchen on fire?” Kuroo’s mom called out, kicking her shoes off and shuffling in to see the two of them trying to make breakfast. “You could’ve waited until I got back so I could help, you know.”  
  
“We wanted to surprise you,” Kuroo defended, pointing to the table that was nicely set up with plates and silverware and toppings for the French toast. “Cooking is just hard.”  
  
She shook her head, smiling to herself. “You should’ve let me teach you more when you still lived here. You were always too busy being bitter to let me do anything with you for awhile.” She walked over to the stove and took over the pan.

  
“It’s never too late to help your poor son out with his terrible skills. Show me your master ways.”  
  
Kuroo’s mom gave Bokuto the job of making the sausages in the microwave while she gave Kuroo a step by step tutorial on how to properly make French toast, including her little tips on how to make certain things better. By the time all three had finished up everything, they were all starving and completely ready to eat the meal they slaved over.

  
They had planned to leave after breakfast, so the conversation rambled on for nearly two hours. It was mostly Kuroo’s mom, giving her detailed accounts of things in her life that she had forgotten to talk about in the last two days, and Bokuto responding to her questions in such a way that she probably could’ve recited his entire life story back to him by the end of it. Kuroo was having such an amazing time with it though, starry-eyed, listening to Bokuto babble on with his mom who he loved just as much. It was different now than it had been before, ever since the last night. It wasn’t just Kuroo’s mom and his crush, it was Kuroo’s mom and his actual boyfriend. The same boyfriend he waited excessively long for. And also, it was the same boyfriend who he wanted to hurry up and leave with already so he didn’t have to spend any longer than necessary resisting the urge to hold his hand or kiss him or any of all the gay thoughts that raced through Kuroo’s mind every time he looked at Bo.

  
The time for them to leave eventually swung around, and Kuroo’s mom practically refused to stop hugging either of them. “Please come back soon, it gets so lonely around here with all my kids gone.”  
  
“I will, Mom,” Kuroo assured her, giving her a peck on the cheek before prying her off of him. “I’ll plan with Kenma around what time I can get the most days off work and I’ll stay extra long. You know I’m just trying to save up to move and I need all the hours I can get.”

  
She nodded understandingly. “Just please make some time for me soon, okay? And please, bring Bokuto back next time! I love him to death.” Her and Bo exchanged smiles.

  
“I’d love to come back if Kuroo will let me,” he assured her, leaning forwards and locking his hands behind his back in a weird playful stance. “Thank you so much for letting me stay.”

  
“Of course, any time!” she grinned. As they left, she continued to wave goodbye from her porch, and Kuroo honked his final farewell as he took off on the road back home.

  
At the first stop light they reached, Kuroo pulled Bokuto in and kissed him, quickly but with all the passion he could muster. It left both of them a little flustered, but neither of them could stop smiling. The whole way home was just them listening to music and talking and sometimes Bokuto would take Kuroo’s hand and trace his thumb in little circles against it.

  
They got to be about an hour from home when Kuroo pulled off into a particularly empty rest stop, the sun was close to setting and the sky was turning a pretty shade of dark orange. Kuroo cracks his neck and stretches a bit but doesn’t get out of the car.

  
“Do you have to stop and pee or something?” Bokuto asked. “Or if we’re going in to get food, don’t judge me for only getting ice cream.”  
  
“No, I just really didn’t wanna wait til we got home,” he shrugged. Before Bokuto could question what he meant, Kuroo pressed his lips against Bo’s, working up the intensity steadily but quickly. It definitely caught Bokuto off guard. Kuroo undoes his seatbelt as well as Bokuto’s in the midst of their kissing, and Bokuto finally slips his eyes shut as they both begin to puff hot breaths onto each other in between kisses. Bokuto moans and Kuroo feels a shiver shoot down his spine and grow in his core. He reaches a hand across the space in between the two seats and rests it on Bokuto’s thigh, slides it up and over and squeezes him through his pants. Bokuto sighs into Kuroo’s mouth, and for the first time since he met this idiot, he feels he knows exactly what to expect.

  
“I’m gonna suck your dick” Kuroo says, bites Bokuto’s lip and then moves to his jaw, listening for Bokuto’s hitches so he knows where to linger.  
  
“H-here?” Bokuto sighs shakily.  
  
“Did you forget that the time you did this to me was in public, while I was working…?” Kuroo stops to say against Bokuto’s skin. He lets out a little laugh.  
  
“Yeah, true.”  
  
Kuroo continues, mapping out the parts of skin that make Bokuto jump, sucks into the nape of his neck as he moves his hand in small circles, squeezing and using the flat of his palm to press against him. Bokuto bucks up a little, and Kuroo takes a bit of pride in that. Bokuto grabs Kuroo’s hand to stop him for a moment, and Kuroo looks up.  
  
“Do it already,” he says, eye contact making Kuroo shiver and nod his head, unzipping Bokuto’s jeans. Kuroo knows this, but he’s a dick, so when he pulls Bokuto’s pants down a little to reveal his underwear, he presses the flat of his tongue against the wet spot growing there. He mouths against the fabric, dampening it with his tongue even more, before Bokuto is tugging at his hair impatiently, and they aren’t particularly soft tugs either. He get’s the hint, pulls his underwear down a little and pulls Bokuto out in his palm, slowly starting to jack him off, mouth still ghosting puffs of hot air around it, and Bokuto groans heavy. Eventually, he gets tired of Kuroo’s teasing, starting to push Kuroo down a little when he starts giving teasing licks to Bokuto’s head. Kuroo welcomes it, opens his mouth and lets Bokuto push and direct his head a little when he sinks down on him. Bokuto bucks up into Kuroo’s mouth, bumping his dick at the back of his throat and Kuroo coughs a little, but doesn’t pull off completely. He’s no rookie at sucking dick, with his last two boyfriends and little drunken college flings, he’s had quite a bit of experience. So, he puts it to good use, bobs his head a little up and down and then sets up a pretty fast pace. He’s a little unsure until Bokuto’s hand fists in his hair when Kuroo swallows around him and Bokuto _pulls_. Kuroo knits his eyebrows together and moans around him, arguably enjoying himself a little _too_  much. He can feel his back protesting with little jolts of pain at the odd sideways angle he’s in to be able to pull this blowjob off in the first place, but he’s too into this to care at this point.

  
“Kuroo,” Bokuto says, and his voice is low and raspy and raw and Kuroo just about loses his mind right there.  
  
“You don’t know how much I think about this,” Bokuto says, tugging his hair again, and Kuroo can’t stop his unrestricted moaning when he does that. Kuroo starts going faster, sucking more harshly, eyes squeezed shut and putting his fucking soul into this. Bokuto lies back for a moment, and Kuroo can _feel_  Bokuto’s stomach muscles quivering.

  
“D-dude…” Bokuto let’s out in a shaky sigh. He pulls off of him for just a second with an obscene popping noise he thought wasn’t even possible, and lets himself breathe for a moment.  
  
“...dude?” Kuroo laughs a little, and Bokuto does too, but Kuroo get’s right back to it.  
  
Bokuto’s bucking up into Kuroo’s throat just enough to still let Kuroo do as he wishes. Hands yanking and pulling harder the closer he get’s to orgasm. Bokuto’s close, Kuroo can tell by the shaking in his legs and stomach and that harshness of his strong fingers in his scalp. Bokuto curls a little into himself and whispers out mumbles of words he can’t understand at first, before they turn into actual words.  
“You want me to fuck you…?” Bokuto whispers harshly, words almost caught in his throat and Kuroo is lost in this. He makes a ‘mmhmm’ sound around the cock in his mouth, swirling his tongue around more, coming up and popping off for air before sinking back down onto it.  
  
“Huh?” Bokuto says, yanking his hair again, and Kuroo has a flashback to his dream a while ago, eyes hooded as his head spins to try to try to tell if this is real or not. The car grows warm, just like Kuroo’s cheeks the longer Bokuto stares down at him. He grips his dick a little tighter than before, and the other hisses through his teeth.  
  
“Really,” Kuroo says, licks the tip of him with his whole tongue, slowly, the drag making Bokuto’s cock move up with Kuroo’s tongue, and spring back when he finally pulls his tongue back into his mouth. When Bokuto opens his eyes to look at him, with the most confidence Kuroo thinks he’s ever had during a situation like this, finishes his sentence with a direct eye contact and a soft smile as he continues to pump Bokuto lazily in his fist.  
  
“Really, _really bad_.”  
  
It’s Bokuto’s turn to become flustered now, and Kuroo gets back to work, prideful in his major win.  
  
“Fuck, fuck yeah, okay, okay I will,” Bokuto mutters, letting his head fall back against the headrest and rolling his hips up into Kuroo’s mouth.  
  
Kuroo goes fast, and Bokuto is already painfully hard with all the teasing, so it happens quickly; Bokuto bucking unapologetically into the mouth around him, holding Kuroo’s head in place and clenching Kuroo’s little curls in his fist until they pull harshly against his scalp. Kuroo moans as he cums, getting most of it in his mouth but pulls off instinctively when it overwhelms him. He get’s a little on one of his cheeks, and some on the side of his mouth and chin. He’s breathing heavy, trying to catch his breath, and Bokuto’s tight fist turns into a soft hand threading through Kuroo’s hair and soothing the itchy burn left behind by his treatment. Kuroo pulls up, trying to slow his breathing as he reaches into the glove compartment for some napkins he keeps in there, wipes the cum off of his face and crumples it up. He places it in his lap so that he remembers to take it inside and throw it out. Bokuto is trying to catch his breath as well as he tucks himself back into his pants.  
  
“What about you…?” he rasps out, looks at the obvious tent Kuroo was pitching.  
  
“I will save this boner for later,” Kuroo pats his crotch twice, smiling. Bokuto huffs out a laugh.  
  
“Then we’re going home right now.”  
  
Kuroo smiles a little to himself, closes his eyes as he lets a blush creep over his cheeks.

  
He had said ‘home’.

 

* * *

 

  
They stumble through Kuroo’s front door after he unlocks it with shaky hands, trying to slip off their shoes Kuroo finds himself pushed against his apartment door when it closes. A knee is lodged in between his legs and Bokuto begins to rock him slowly but harshly so Kuroo’s back makes a thump against the door every time he grinds his knee against him. They aren’t kissing, staring at each other before Bokuto dips down to suck a dark bruise into Kuroo’s neck that he _knows_  he’s gonna need to cover up with something later.  
  
“I love you,” Kuroo whispers against Bokuto’s lips when he raises his head back up after he’s finished with his hickey. Bokuto smiles, cups his neck with his hands, rubs circles into the sides of Kuroo’s neck so he can feel the fluttering pulse, “I love you too.”  
  
“Well, I fucking hate you guys,” Tsukki yells from the couch.  
  
The two chuckle a little but then resume their kissing, stumbling along to try to get to Kuroo’s bedroom without breaking contact.  
  
“You two are ugly,” Tsukki mutters, and Kuroo laughs again.  
  
“I swear, Tetsurou, you better keep it down,” Tsukki warns. Kuroo smiles, breaking his kiss to just be pressed against the hallway wall again, hands roaming to squeeze his ass and make him jump a little. He turns to Tsukki as Bokuto places feather light kisses up his neck that make him shiver.  
  
“Don’t worry Tsukki, I’m not that loud,” he sighs.  
  
“You will be today,” Bokuto laughs into his skin, and Kuroo blushes but smiles at the same time.  
  
“Heh, put your headphones on,” Kuroo laughs, sticking his tongue out at his roommate.  
  
“Gross!” Tsukki says as Kuroo is pulled towards the bedroom. Kuroo slips off the shoe he hadn’t gotten off yet and throws it at Tsukki before running off with Bokuto back to the bedroom. He hears a ‘fuck!’ which makes him, very, very happy.  
  
Not as happy as it makes him to be on his back, legs places over Bokuto’s shoulders as he reaches down to finger himself open, he’s just taken in a third finger, bottle of lube discarded somewhere on the bed. Bokuto is watching and drinking in the sight, running his long, pale fingers up along the insides of Kuroo’s thighs, making the muscles jump under his light touches. Kuroo’s moaning, pushing back against his fingers that forces a harsh dry breath out of him each time. His eyes are closed, wrapped up in the pleasure he’s giving himself to even remember what’s going on. Bokuto notices that Kuroo looks like he’s close already, and paws at Kuroo’s hand until he reluctantly pulls his fingers out of himself with a gasp and a groan.  
  
“Incredible,” Bokuto starts, sliding his hands up Kuroo’s chest as he leans in, dicks bumping together, and Kuroo grumbles low in his throat, “you’re absolutely incredible.”  
  
Kuroo doesn’t mean to let out a whine, but he does, and Bokuto makes a pleased hum in return, so soft Kuroo barely notices.  
  
“Stunning,” he says softly, tweaks a nipple with one finger before just placing his heavy hands there, pressing down, and Kuroo’s floating in heaven. He scrabbles for Bokuto’s hands, grabbing him by both of his wrists with his hands, looking up at him with eyes blown with arousal and pretty, flushed, tanned skin.  
  
“What is it, babe…?” Bokuto smiles down at him. Kuroo groans.  
  
“Jesus fucking Christ,” he mumbles, reaches an arm up to cover his eyes. Bokuto pries it off and pins his wrist down. Kuroo panics and brings his other arm up to do the same, and Bokuto laughs something sweet, grabs his wrist and pins that ones against the bed as well.  
  
“Kuroo,” he leans down to speak next to his ear, goosebumps rising all over Kuroo’s body and sending a pulsing heat coiling in his abdomen, “let go, baby.”  
  
Kuroo groans, feels Bokuto’s dick pressing against him, stilling before Bokuto reaches down to cover himself with more lube, condom already rolled on.  
“Let go, baby,” he repeats again, before slowly starting to push himself in. Kuroo groans, hands still pinned to the bed. He wiggles his hips down, trying to get Bokuto inside of him more, bucks his hips up, doesn’t know what to do with them. Bokuto notices Kuroo’s eagerness, and pushes in faster, quickly bottoming out. Kuroo chokes, a noise made when the air is forced from your lungs and you’re trying to suck something back in for dear life. When he does gain a breath again, all he can do it let out a long, loud moan, and grind back down onto Bokuto. He uses his hands pinned to Kuroo’s wrists as leverage when he starts to thrust inside. It feels too good, thrashes a little to get his wrists back and grab Bokuto’s toned shoulders, scratching and digging the nails he did have into the skin. Bokuto smiles and bites the quickly blooming hickey on his neck from earlier in retaliation, and Kuroo let’s out a sound that could only be described, embarrassingly enough, as a yelp.  
  
“You know the first time I saw you,” Bokuto sighs, and Kuroo cracks an eye open, “I was, ah-.... ‘was starstruck.”  
  
Kuroo shivers, “w-what?”  
  
“Like,” Bokuto thrusts a little harder, and Kuroo breath comes out in short puffs of air, “like someone made you and based you off of what I’ve wanted forever.”  
  
Kuroo whines, but it doesn’t stop there. Bokuto sits back on his knees, Kuroo’s long, pretty legs raised a little higher, and it gives Bokuto a better angle and makes Kuroo cry out and Bokuto hiss through his teeth.  
  
“B-but you’re not just beautiful,” he sighs, closes his eyes for a moment and sucks his lip between his teeth. Kuroo files that in his favourite images he’s ever seen.  
  
“You’re kind, considerate, so fucking funny, and you’re just so...” Bokuto laughs a little under his breath, another few thrusts harder than normal as he fucks into Kuroo hard, “ _pretty_.” Kuroo can barely register the words that Bokuto is giving him, as they’re not going through his ears and to his head but more just straight to his cock. He whines, shivers, knows the only thing he can do is push back and hopefully help Bokuto in any way he can to make him cum.  
  
“Bokuto,” Kuroo starts, and after he does start it doesn’t seem like he can stop. “Bokuto, Bokuto, I can’t-...” he trails off, but Bokuto catches him, moves on top of him again and stops his thrusting for just a moment. Kuroo whines, loud and pretty.  
  
“You can’t what…?” Bokuto smiles, eyelids low and cheeks dusted red. Kuroo can’t think, his filter and anxieties completely gone.  
  
“I can’t believe you exist,” Kuroo whispers, voice cracking halfway through. Bokuto’s eyes go wide, and he grins, leans in and gives Kuroo a sweet kiss. Kuroo relaxes into it, forgetting for a moment his desperation to cum. Then Bokuto snaps his hips quickly again and Kuroo’s mouth opens wide, sucking in air as Bokuto watches.  
  
Bokuto lifts a leg over his shoulder, and Kuroo has to adjust to the new angle, prostate being hit and rubbed into practically every other thrust.  
  
“So good,” Bokuto sighs, voice dense, “so pretty and perfect,” Bokuto groans, grips Kuroo’s leg on his shoulder and digs his fingers into the other thigh beneath him.  
  
Kuroo’s vision is black with sparks of white flickering around the edges, eyes squeezed tight with overwhelming pleasure.  
  
“I’m-” he whines at a particularly harder thrust.  
  
“I’m gonna- gonna cum, Bokuto,” he barely get’s out. Bokuto smiles, picks up the pace, and Kuroo has to raise his arms up to place them against the headboard to prevent himself from his head smacking into it with each thrust.  
  
“Do it,” he says, “cum, Tetsurou, all for me,” the last part was a whisper. With one hand quickly scrabbling down to grab hold of his aching dick, his first name on Bokuto’s lips and tongue still bouncing around in his mind. It takes him only three lazy tugs until he’s arching off of the bed with a sharp, quick cry, followed by muffled groans as he tightly presses his lips together. He opens them again to puff out ragged breaths as Bokuto fucks him thoroughly all throughout his orgasm.  
  
“You too,” Kuroo’s voice is raspy and hot, “cum for me too.”  
  
Bokuto curls in on himself, letting go of Kuroo’s leg to grab onto his hips and thrusts in until he stills for a moment, Kuroo’s first name whimpered out of his kiss bruised lips, before proceeding to thrust in shallowly with the last bit of energy he has left.  
  
Bokuto collapses on top of Kuroo, but rolls off quickly knowing how heavy he is. The two lie next to each other on their backs, staring up at the ceiling and panting raggedly, just trying to return back to themselves. Kuroo can’t help but fall asleep right there, exhaustion taking him over and wrapping him in a warm blanket of post orgasm bliss. The last thing he registers before he nods off is Bokuto wiping him clean with some tissues, and climbing into bed with him, snuggling against Kuroo’s chest after placing the sweetest of kisses on his forehead.

* * *

 

The morning after is slow, hazy. Both of them are still left nearly spinning from the night before, and it takes a lot of half-conscious kisses and pulling each other closer before they finally accept that they’re awake.  
  
“We left all of our bags in the car,” is all Kuroo manages. As everything from the night previous came flooding back, he was feeling more and more flustered by it. He was used to having more composure than he did then, and knowing Bokuto saw him like that was embarrassing in a way. He couldn’t find the words to really say anything about it.  
  
“Are you saying we have to get them right immediately now?” Bokuto whined into him.  
  
“No, I’m just saying,” he continued, floundering for an excuse, “that you have terrible morning breath and we have our toothbrushes out there.”  
  
Bokuto laughed, rolling away from Kuroo and onto his back. “Fair enough. I’m a little afraid Tsukki might kick my ass if I leave the room though.”  
  
“Nah, it’s my ass who has to worry.”  
  
“Yeah, especially if it’s already sore, then it’d just be unfair,” Bokuto snickered, causing Kuroo to go red again.  
  
“You’re such a dick,” he grumbled, forcing himself up so he could get clothes on and become a functional human being. Him and Bokuto both threw on clothes from the day prior, heading out to the car to get their things. Tsukki gave them a disgusted glare in passing, but had wisely still had headphones in, so they were spared the extra commentary. The first thing they did after dropping their bags in Kuroo’s room was dig for toothbrushes, because they can’t even imagine how gross they fucking smell, Kuroo especially.  
  
Once they had made their way back into his room, Kuroo shut the door behind them, pulling Bokuto in by his face and Bokuto pulling Kuroo in by the waist, kissing like it was the proper first kiss moment. It wasn’t heated and sexual like last night’s had been, or the one’s in the car, and it wasn’t like the gentle morning pecks they had exchanged while getting ready that day and the day before. This was real; the two of them melding together like all this time they had been searching for someone to fit into them as easily as they did into one another, grabbing and pulling each other closer until there wasn’t any space between them left to fill. This moment was their first breath of air coming up from a watery haze, their first feeling of care and protection that extended deeper than any other physical action, this was their cheesy Bright Eyes ‘First Day of my Life’ moment, and they immersed themselves in it for every second they could.  
  
“So, like…” Bokuto began after that moment eventually ended. “Are we boyfriends now?”  
  
Kuroo nodded hopefully. “I’d love to be. Officially.”  
  
“Officially,” he grinned, hugging Kuroo close. “What do you wanna do now? Like, now that we’re boyfriends hanging out instead of just bros.”  
  
“I mean...I’m not sure. Have you ever had a boyfriend?” Kuroo asked quizzically.  
  
“No, have you?”  
  
“Well, yeah, but my past boyfriends were always the types to go out and do stuff all the time, so we never really did anything at home.”  
  
They both stared at each other in confusion before Bokuto pulled his phone out. “I’m gonna google it.”  
  
The two hovered over Bokuto’s phone, tapping in ‘what do boyfriends do’ to the search bar. Every result was either talking about qualities of a good boyfriend, which wasn’t what they needed, or it was an extensive list of all the possible date ideas that they could have. There was absolutely nothing that actually explained what they were supposed to do when they just are trying to chill.  
  
“Well, maybe we can still do all our bro stuff, y’know?” Kuroo finally said after several failed Yahoo Answers and wikihow results. “So, if you wanna watch TV or play a videogame or something, we can. The only difference is now we can kiss and stuff when we do it.”  
  
Bokuto nodded excitedly. “Okay!”  
  
So, the two of them did just that. With Bokuto leaning against the wall with Kuroo lying in between his legs, head against Bo’s stomach, they began playing video games together. Occasionally, one would do exceptionally well, and instead of going to high five or something like that, they’d be just a little more affectionate, and _then_  high five. When they were more affectionate, there was always a hint of hesitation, where they would ask if it’s not too weird to do something like give casual kisses or things like that. Now that the initial sense of “oh my god I finally can touch you I’m never gonna stop” had worn off, they both realized that they hadn’t really established boundaries, so they would always ask before doing something. Obviously, neither had any issue, and once one was given the O.K. to do something, it was like a weight was lifted off. There was so much more freedom between them now that the tension that used to linger between the two had faded. They didn't have to hide anything anymore, no worrying over if a touch is too much or watching what they say in case it's too forward. Bokuto and Kuroo were able to just be happy and together for one night.

  
But eventually that night did have to end, and the next days were going to be a lot less pleasant.

  
They gave themselves a couple more days before Bokuto knew he had to go back home to gather the rest of his things. Kuroo spent time rearranging his room, compiling boxes to pack Bo’s things in, and talking the situation through with Tsukki. The night before, Kuroo had made sure to be a bit extra affectionate towards his boy, knowing that it wasn’t going to be easy to go back home after only a little over a week between then and everything that had happened.

  
That morning came though, and Kuroo took Bokuto back to his house to pack up the remainder of his belongings, and then officially move in with Kuroo. They made sure that Bokuto’s parents were out before beginning to take trip after trip of bringing things out to the truck they borrowed from Tanaka for the occasion. It's not like Bokuto was a very materialistic person, bringing along unnecessary vanities, but what took longest to transport was his owl collection. Kuroo wouldn't even think of him leaving it behind.

  
Heading up the walkway into Bokuto’s home was chilling. The air was heavy and gloomy over the two, memories of the last time they had been there kept replaying endlessly across their minds. It was a bitter pain that Kuroo felt just from being near Bokuto, who was trying his hardest to keep it together. They both knew that it was likely that after everything, they would never be back here again. The place where Bokuto had grown up, the place where all of his memories were held, the place where they spent real time together for the first time. Every experience Bo had ever had was here: paved into the driveway of skinned knees and treks to the bus stop in grade school, wallpapers laced through with teenage laughter molded with solemn whispers, each crack in the floorboards, each hole in the wall, each thread of the carpeting had absorbed everything that he ever lived. Twenty-something years of life and laughter and pain and rage. All of it was wrapped up, floating like ghosts within the towering walls of the estate, only to be left behind.

  
Their moving day began feeling more and more like a funeral procession.

  
By the end though, the truck contained Bokuto’s mattress (the largest item and reason for the truck in the first place), a dresser, clothes, games and systems, and owls. There were a few miscellaneous necessities he had thrown in, and several things he only took because he knew that now that he's self-reliant, he could sell them if he ever reached that point, but he didn’t take anything he didn’t absolutely need. He still had his bank account with his savings, and any cash that he had locked up in a safe, so he wasn’t doing poorly financially, but knowing he would have to now start providing for himself so suddenly was still a scary thought, and his little time to process only made him more panicked. Kuroo’s reassurance helped, but the unsettled feeling in Bokuto’s gut grew strong as the two began to head out.

  
Bokuto stood in the doorway before leaving, soaking in the final moments before shutting the door, closing up all of his life behind him and moving on to begin again.

  
The drive back home was tense, silence dripping over them and the mass of Bokuto’s heartache weighed heavy on both of them. Kuroo couldn’t even imagine what he was thinking and dealing with, but just experiencing it second-hand was bad, so he hardly could focus on how miserable it must have been for Bo. It got easier once they were back at the apartment and moving boxes in. Then, the situation felt less like a goodbye and more like a fresh start. Stacking up things in the corners of Kuroo’s teeny bedroom made it feel even smaller, but it was somehow still more comfortable.

  
Once everything was settled and ready to be unpacked, Kuroo plopped down onto his bed and gestured for Bokuto to sit with him. He pulled him into an embrace, Bokuto’s cheek pressing against Kuroo’s chest, his arms wrapped firmly around his boyfriend.

  
“Hey, this isn’t gonna be as bad as we might think,” Kuroo offered, shedding his usual pessimistic outlook for the sake of Bo.  
  
“I know,” he sighed, snaking his arms under Kuroo so the two were both hugging one another. “It just sucks a lot, y’know?”  
  
“You’re right,” he agreed. “It sucks but we can get through it. You’ve got a car and a job and a place to stay. We both can pick up more shifts and earn some money. I’ll help you get on your feet.”  
  
“That’s gay,” Bokuto teased, pushing Kuroo a bit. “But thank you. For actually being here and helping and sticking around.”  
  
“I mean, yeah, why wouldn’t I? I care about you.”  
  
“That feels so surreal,” he chuckled. “Like, holy shit, you’re actually here and you like me and stuff.”  
  
Despite not having to hide his feelings anymore, Kuroo, being a giant queer, still blushed furiously whenever Bokuto said or did anything that made his heart flutter. “Th-that’s gay. But I feel you, like, I feel the same.”  
  
“I honestly, like, I’m really glad I met you,” Bo started, looking up at Kuroo. “Like, everything that happened really sucks, and I blamed you at first but I had to come out eventually or else I’d just be living unhappily. And my parents would have been really bad about it whether I had come out a year ago or a day ago or if I were to come out ten years from now. No matter when I did it, they’re just bad people who would have treated me badly. But, like...the difference is that you were here. I don’t think I could have made it through the first night if I didn’t have you. And that really means a lot.”  
  
Kuroo probably would have cried if he weren’t already blushing and smiling as hard as he was; he wanted to spare just a shred of his dignity. “That’s...really gay...I’m glad I, like, y’know, was able to be there. And I always wanna, y’know, be around and be there for you.” He couldn’t stop stumbling over his words, which only made Bokuto turn pink too.  
  
“I guess I’m just saying that I’m really lucky to have you in my life and also I like you a lot,” he finished, flashing a cheesy smile at the end before Kuroo pulled him up and in even tighter.  
  
“I like you a lot too,” he murmured through his own grin, pressing his face into the crook of Bo’s neck so he wouldn’t have to have himself be seen so flustered. “I-I’ve liked you since like, the moment I saw you, honestly.”  
  
“Me too,” Bokuto smiled, nudging Kuroo’s head back up so he could kiss him. Their lips were soft, moving gently with each other’s like gears only designed for each other, perfectly in tune, in sync. Lying there with Bo on top of him, his boxes full of possessions scattered around his room, waiting to be unpacked, Kuroo finally achieved that sense of home that he wistfully sought after ever since he realized he had feelings for Bokuto. He craved nothing more than this domesticity, waking up with Bokuto, watching TV with Bokuto, hell, even just sitting with him in the room while they both do separate things was enough. The sensation in his chest was like he was so light that his body felt too heavy to hold it all in. He had build up so much care and affection inside of him that every touch, every kiss with Bokuto hardly felt long enough. He could have happily spent the rest of his life lying there with him in that moment.  
  
They kissed for a long time--nothing sexual, nothing really innocent either. Just the two of them finally feeling whole together.  
  
“Do you wanna watch Rick and Morty?” Bokuto finally asked once they had begun to die down a bit.  
  
“Sure,” Kuroo smiled, rolling Bo off of him and onto the mattress beside him so he could get up to turn on the TV. He set everything up and curled up beside Bokuto once more, mounds of pillows and soft blankets surrounding them. It was everything he had wanted out of that first time Bo had come over, that night when he could hardly keep his hands to himself, where his pleasantly vivid dream sent him reeling into a crisis that was the push he needed to embrace the love he had found. It was everything he had wanted, and then even better, he had Bokuto.  
  
They stayed like that, cuddled together, watching a show that was Kuroo’s favorite, and Bokuto’s favorite partly because he loved how much Kuroo loved it. The two eventually dozed off, sleeping better together than they ever would apart. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!!!!!! It's finally done everyone!!  
>  This is officially the longest thing I've ever written! My other Bokuroo fic only reached like 40k I think. I'm so so hype and thanks to everyone who's waited for me to get my shit together since I posted the first chapter way back in like fucking june. 
> 
> While technically we didn't write 50k for nanowrimo, I'm still proud that I've hit 50k regardless of the time frame.
> 
> I wanna thank all u sweet sweet people who comment because I check every day and they warm my gay little heart.  
> And my boyfriend RJ whose helped me get this back up and started again after I left it dormant for so long!  
> Follow me on twitter @owlfuker, and follow RJ @kkozuken !!
> 
> And for a final note this is the last chapter but there will be a lil epilogue thing coming out in the next few days or week or so. 
> 
> Thank you all so much and I love you all that read my stuff bc I just started getting back into writing after being too negative abt my writing to be able to do it and everything you guys do even just a guest leaving a lil kudos and nothing else is enough to help me get me in a positive enough mood to write again. !!
> 
> I'm so excited but this note is too long sos, thank you so much I appreciate everything and I love u guys and I fucking love Bokuroo too. best ship 2k16

**Author's Note:**

> These chapters are probably gonna be short esp compared to my other stuff sorry :(  
> EVENTFUL SOON !!!!
> 
> ((twitter: @owlfuker))


End file.
